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Random Thoughts v.3

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You are lucky then. Not all of us can get the girl we want. For some of us it's a big struggle. If you had been in the dating world trying to get the women you want and experiencing what i have you would have a different outlook.

You can speculate, but cannot presume to know what my outlook is about anything. Nor can say with any certainty that in the 28 years since I moved into my first apartment with my girlfriend, that a different experiene would change my nature. Your so-called "dating world" is merely a matter of perspective. There is only one world out there. A date is a date. The rest is semantics.

*edit to add* And your repeated use of the word "want" is at the very core of your girl troubles. You're supposed to "get the girl" you're meant to be with at that point in time.

Edited by Evster2012

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You can speculate, but cannot presume to know what my outlook is about anything. Nor can say with any certainty that in the 28 years since I moved into my first apartment with my girlfriend, that a different experiene would change my nature. Your so-called "dating world" is merely a matter of perspective. There is only one world out there. A date is a date. The rest is semantics.

*edit to add* And your repeated use of the word "want" is at the very core of your girl troubles. You're supposed to "get the girl" you're meant to be with at that point in time.

Well you said that if i had experienced what you have then my outlook would be different. :rolleyes:

What i mean by the dating world is the dating scene. Where people go to meet the opposite sex. That's not the same situation as a married person's.

So in other words you should hook up with the woman you are "meant to be with" and the not the one you want? if everyone had that attitude about like they would never try and improve themselves. They would only take what they are handed.

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Well you said that if i had experienced what you have then my outlook would be different. :rolleyes:

Actually, I said "Wonder what your viewpoint would be if that ever happened to you." in reply to your blanket statement that my outlook would be different. Try and follow along.

What i mean by the dating world is the dating scene. Where people go to meet the opposite sex. That's not the same situation as a married person's.

I know what the dating scene is. I'm a musician. I play in clubs remember?

And I'm not married.

So in other words you should hook up with the woman you are "meant to be with" and the not the one you want? if everyone had that attitude about like they would never try and improve themselves. They would only take what they are handed.

Those are definitely "other words". I never implied one should "settle". Life is dynamic. It's about chemistry. The way you phrase things makes it sound like a meat market. You speak in absolutes, when what you say is actually theory. It's like saying it's only an island if you view it from the water.

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Actually, I said "Wonder what your viewpoint would be if that ever happened to you." in reply to your blanket statement that my outlook would be different. Try and follow along.

I know what the dating scene is. I'm a musician. I play in clubs remember?

And I'm not married.

Those are definitely "other words". I never implied one should "settle". Life is dynamic. It's about chemistry. The way you phrase things makes it sound like a meat market. You speak in absolutes, when what you say is actually theory. It's like saying it's only an island if you view it from the water.

I am just saying i think you're outlook would be different if you had more bad experiences with the opposite sex.. You said you got ever woman you wanted. If you failed at getting them you would have to have a different outlook i think. That type of stuff alters one's outlook. I think positive experiences make a positive attitude and negative makes negative. It's all in one's experiences.

If you know what the dating scene is then you can't say it's not "another world". It is. It's not the same as what people who are involved with someone experience. It's a whole different ballgame. it's pretty cutthroat. You must see that at your club.

Go back and see what you posted. You said i should go with who i am "meant to be with" and not who i want. Unless you meant something else.

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That's bullshit. :lol:

You didn't answer my question. Was it you who really ended it because you couldn't stand the fact that she was looking at your stupid pimple, or was it her who dumped you?

Also...I can assure you that it's not natural. Natural is not to worriy about insignificant imperfections. I can also assure you that I've been struggling with lack of confidence too, so I know what I'm talking about. My stupid behaviour cost me a lot of opportinities.

BTW, Evster is over fourty. He, as well as the majority of the guys who respond to you are much more experienced than you. I'd bet that even my 16 year old brother is more experienced that you, in spite of his terrible skin.

We weren't a couple. There was no one to dump. Just a woman i was interested in. I couldn't stand the fact she was looking at it. And it ruined my mood and made me feel like crap and even more self concious about it. So i just gave up. And if she keep looking at it must have been distracting to her. Anytime i get one now and try and put some concealer on to make it look not as bad. But you can still tell.

You would never know you struggle with confidence. You are pretty and wouldn't have to be self concious about your looks.

I know Evster is older than me but i don't think he has more experience than me when it comes to bad experiences with women or lack of success with women that he wanted. Different experience. And the same could be true for the others guys.

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I know Evster is older than me but i don't think he has more experience than me when it comes to bad experiences with women or lack of success with women that he wanted. Different experience. And the same could be true for the others guys.

Whoa, hold the phone there bud!! I've had nightmarish-Hell-on-Earth-and-despair-filled-crawl-into-a-corner-somebody-kill-me experiences with certifiably dysfunctional women.

The difference between yours and my experiences is that you get dissed in a matter of minutes by women who don't fly by your rules in the dating game, while it takes me weeks, months and years until I get eroded from the inside and utterly soul-destroyed before I walk away from the table. Maybe your system works better for you, though I see no evidence of that.

I said I always got the girl. I never said I didn't wind up having bad experiences.You have NO IDEA what I've experienced. I've lived several of your lives. You're what 21, 22? You and your possy out pulling chicks? Dude, when you think you've even come close to what I've been through, I'd really like to hear it. I've seen suicide right in front of my face, trips to the ER, mental illness, drug and alcohol addiction, borderline personality disorder. Yeah, I've seen girls turn! I've been fucked up, fucked with and fucked over. I've also done a helluva lot more of the good kind of fucking than you.

Blissful months and years with the "perfect woman" ripped from me with my heart tossed across the room, and the agony of believing I'd never love again.

I've watched every relationship I've ever had crumble (except the current one). You're crying cause the chick won't split a check!

Edited by Evster2012

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Very well put. I still kick myself everyday for giving my first wife the upper hand. I should have bolted when warned by friends back in 1984. But like you, had to learn the hard way. Divorce from hell, expensive, kids went through shit they never should have had to deal with. the only reason the bitch is still breathing is my kids. Remarried but the anger never leaves. It goes away for long periods and returns at times. the fact that she will get part of my pension is enough to burn my ass in itself. Spats will look back someday and realize his problems are pale compared to the ones you mentioned. Hope that if you are in a relationship now that it works out forever. I guess one never knows.

I know one thing for certain: If this one goes south, it will have been my fault. My girl has no issues. ;)

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Happy birthday Alicia!!

:birthday:

So, how'd it go at the DMV??

Fantastic. I got a 2 on my driving test. I don't kow where you are from but here 0 is a perfect and 36 is failing. It was great, I was so happy.

I was a "gentlemen" the other week. And i got used. I let my guard for a second and i got it right between the eyes. She got everything she wanted and i got zero.

So how exactly did you get used? Did you have to pay for the meal? Did you spend moer money on her than yourswelf?

As for your conversation with Ev: Something tells me that Ev got the girls because he respects them all the time and probably doesn't have much set as to what they have to be. I bet he is more willing to accept the real woman and not Little Miss Perfect. And you know what he got? One of the nicest people I have ever talked to. I met both of them on the forum, and even when I was a newbie they were still very nice and patient with me. I think you should be willing to accept someone who is willing to accept you.

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^^Hey! Happy birthday!! And congrats on acing the DMV test! Liberation!!! :cheer:

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Thanks! I love driving by myself or with a friend. It's much less stressful, plus I love being able to drive when I please. I do have to tell my paents I'm leaving but I can come and go as I would like.

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Good for you! That kind of freedom opens you up to a much wider world. And with that freedom comes enhanced responsibility. So now you're the driver. Keep safe and enjoy your newly accessible open spaces (and the ability to venture on impulse)! ;)

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We weren't a couple. There was no one to dump. Just a woman i was interested in. I couldn't stand the fact she was looking at it. And it ruined my mood and made me feel like crap and even more self concious about it. So i just gave up. And if she keep looking at it must have been distracting to her. Anytime i get one now and try and put some concealer on to make it look not as bad. But you can still tell.

Thank you, that's exactly what I wanted to hear. So in the end, it was not HER shallownes that ruined the date, it was YOUR vanity and YOUR obsession with your own little imperfection. She didn't even say a word, she was just looking at it. :rolleyes:

Yeah, she was probably distracted; so would I, because anytime I see a good flesky pimple, I just want to squeeze it out. My bf is a frequent wictim of my "violence".

Maybe it way distracting to her, but the fact is that you have obviously no idea if that made her like you less or not. She was just looking at it, big deal. I'd bet she must have thought that you gave it up because she didn't impress you.

You would never know you struggle with confidence. You are pretty and wouldn't have to be self concious about your looks.

I've had many reasons for being self conscious, and my looks is just one of them. (I didn't say it was just my looks. That's again your distorted version of reality.) I'm also very much aware of the irrational base of many of them. That's why I can cope with it, although sometimes it's still hard.

That's the problem spats, even the prettiest girl could struggle with confidence, though you would never tell. One single bad word heard in your childhood can poison your mind to such an extent that you'll never be able to see yourself objectively again. Sometimes, your perception of yourself can get so distorted that you'll become the main destroyer of your luck. People who don't know me often think that I'm conceited and arrogant (which, after I realized this, made me even more miserable). The very opposite is true. I'm not conceited, I'm just very shy. Maybe because by looking at me, you would never tell that I'm self-conscious, people have concluded that I'm an arrogant bitch. And no one wants to be friends with arrogant bitch, right? This is how "problems" are made.

I know Evster is older than me but i don't think he has more experience than me when it comes to bad experiences with women or lack of success with women that he wanted. Different experience. And the same could be true for the others guys.

Bad experience is often the result of bad attitude... That's why these other guys criticize you so much, because it is obvious from your posts that it is you, and not the women around you, who's the source of your "problems."

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Thanks! I love driving by myself or with a friend. It's much less stressful, plus I love being able to drive when I please. I do have to tell my paents I'm leaving but I can come and go as I would like.

I'm happy for you Alicia!! :yay:

But please think of us still slaving away in drivers ed for weeks..... ;)

How long did you have to have drivers ed?

Edited by ms_zeppelin94

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I had if for one semester, about 3 and a half months for 50 minutes a day.

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I had if for one semester, about 3 and a half months for 50 minutes a day.

whoa...I kinda feel bad for you... I only have to have 30 hours, so it's two weeks from 8-11am. But three hours seems like a long time at 8am when I'm normally crashed on my Aunt's couch...

You're probably a better driver than I will be though :P

Edited by ms_zeppelin94

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Jesus H. if whining were a crime Spatsoid would be 'dead man walking'. Waaaaaa WAAAAAAAA WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

It's not the women, it's Y-O-U.

Yes. Yes it is you.

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Jesus H. if whining were a crime Spatsoid would be 'dead man walking'. Waaaaaa WAAAAAAAA WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

It's not the women, it's Y-O-U.

Yes. Yes it is you.

:goodpost:

But he won't realize.

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:goodpost:

But he won't realize.

Thanks, lol that's as sure as death and taxes. Like a multi-car wreck on the highway, there's nothing anyone can do, but everyone slows down and rubbernecks at it. Then everyone drives on.

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"whats it all about alfie"

c'mon sing it with me granma. my granma used to play the piano by ear and sing. i remember she had the single of -tie a yellow ribbon around the old oak tree and play it over and over.

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Fear Not

Fear not, the false fear instilled during your youth.

Fear not, the truth you are learning.

Fear not, the threats of others.

Fear not, the fear of failing.

Fear not, the unjust leaders we mistakenly elect.

Fear not, the wrongs they cast upon you.

Fear not, the corrupt leaders leading you.

Fear not, the rules the corrupt place upon you.

Fear not, the foreign neighbor.

Fear not, his beliefs.

Fear not, the fabrications the church uses to control you.

Fear not, life.

Fear not, death.

Fear not, Satan, he only exist if you allow him in your life.

Fear not, God, because if you fear your creator you choose to live in fear, I choose not.

MOJO

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One day conservatives are going to have to propose the only practical solution to global warming: DESTRUCTION OF THE SUN!

The voices in my head have stopped and it's making me paranoid because I think I'm not fun to talk to anymore.

Of course, I used rational thought to find that flaw in rational thought. It boggles the mind. Ooh, I should play Boggle.

Why do we need our right pinkies?

Brokeback Mountain killed the dinosaurs

Hey if you get a chance please ask your old neighbor if she still has a piano for sale.

...But that's not the best part, then they come back in with a bowl of pudding and two straws!

I don't give a fart about flatulence!

I'll name my kid Anonymous.

Vin Diesel was the inspiration for Captain Planet.

The only golf course on the island of Tonga has 15 holes, and there's no penalty if a monkey steals your golf ball.

T-Mobile: Stick Together With Chuck Norris.

Global Warming could not effect us in anyway possible.

Sorry, it's very late here and I'm very bored. : D

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One day conservatives are going to have to propose the only practical solution to global warming: DESTRUCTION OF THE SUN!

The voices in my head have stopped and it's making me paranoid because I think I'm not fun to talk to anymore.

Of course, I used rational thought to find that flaw in rational thought. It boggles the mind. Ooh, I should play Boggle.

Why do we need our right pinkies?

Brokeback Mountain killed the dinosaurs

Hey if you get a chance please ask your old neighbor if she still has a piano for sale.

...But that's not the best part, then they come back in with a bowl of pudding and two straws!

I don't give a fart about flatulence!

I'll name my kid Anonymous.

Vin Diesel was the inspiration for Captain Planet.

The only golf course on the island of Tonga has 15 holes, and there's no penalty if a monkey steals your golf ball.

T-Mobile: Stick Together With Chuck Norris.

Global Warming could not effect us in anyway possible.

Sorry, it's very late here and I'm very bored. : D

Amen. Sleep well!

And remember, even if global warming (whatever that is) wipes our asses out, Earth ain't dead. Life will always poke its head up. "I'm baaack". No guilt on geological time. So we failed to achieve a perfect world! A couple million years pass, and they can't find any trace of our existence. Would be nice if we could somehow leave behind the recipe for the Belgian Waffle.

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