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11 Worst Music Artists of the Aughts


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11 Worst Music Artists of the Aughts

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My Lovely Lady Lumps / Guest Contributor: George

The new millennium has not been a good decade for music. With the mass corporate buyout of most local radio stations, the rise of the Emo movement, the death of rock and roll, Napster causing the outrage that it did, the decline of the music album, and the motherfucking Jonas Brothers appearing on the cover of the decrepit remains of Rolling Stone happening all in the same decade, it’s no wonder we endured such a musical holocaust such as the aughts.

The worst part, however, was how much of a waste of potential the aughts were. Come the fuck on, people. America went through two wars, an economic collapse, the absolute worst president you can have and still live in a democracy, the absolute worst vice president ever, unlimited ability to distribute music, and this is the best we could do? Fucking pathetic, the 60s would be ashamed of us.

But who were the absolute worst bands we put up with? Who were the groups and artists that brought music to its knees? Though everyone will have different opinions on what order they should be put in (especially with my last two), I think that this guide captures a fare job of the shit storm that the aughts gave us.

In picking the selection, I had to go by some guidelines in order to be fair. For one, I had to automatically disqualify anyone who was a non-music related celebrity before making an album (Tyra Banks, Paris Hilton, and Lindsay Lohan would have topped this list otherwise) as well as disqualify anyone who rose to musical prominence before this decade (Creed, Poison, and The Backstreet Boys, though the worst of their decades, would be unfair to the competition) and for the sake of fairness, I’ve tried to limit the inclusion of studio bands (with one exception too bad to ignore).

Bear in mind, to conduct research, I didn’t actually buy these albums, I didn’t even download them. I listened to the songs off Youtube with headphones, and threw away the headphones after I finished writing. Also, even though a new act could come out soon, I would really consider them more of a band of the next decade. And they would have to be truly abominable to claim a spot here.

So here it is, the absolute worst “musicians” of the last tragic decade. God, I hope the teens are better.

Click here to read the list.

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That's so funny and completely right!

Has anyone seen the new Rolling Stone? I got my copy in the mail and thought I signed up for the wrong thing. It was someone named Lady Gaga (?) and she hs cotton candy floss hair and double bubble gum bubbles for clothes. I figured out why they had her on there, she released some song called "Pokerface". Save yourself whle you can, and don't listen to it.

Edited by lzfan715
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I assume this was written by one of those kids who "OMG only listens to stuff frum the 70s, it's soo much better! New music suckzz!"

Not that I like any of those artists, but really, did we need him to tell us they sucked? No, not really.

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The writer of this article certainly said what was on his mind, LOL. Those songs off of the freecreditreport.com commericals stay stuck in my head. :P

:lol: Mine too! There's also this ad for education online (I forget the name of the site) that has a song that I find irritating but as soon as I hear it, I'm singing it all day :slapface:

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Don't hold back, George, whatever you do...

Honestly, for just a highschooler he has all the articulation, cynicism and wit as that of your everyday edgy web-journalist. Hmm...

That aside, some of what he says does ring true - though I've never heard a 'K-Fed'/The Freecreditreport.com Band (wtf?) song - but, really, the majority of it is not the best of lists compiled.

'George' obviously doesn't like Miley/Jonas Brothers (and neither do I), but he's comparing them to '60's bands, and unfairly so. It's a given that some bands nowadays will pale in comparison to some '60's bands. Pitching Miley up against Pink Floyd and The Beatles is a no brainer.

He's talking about these acts as if they're world famous and still going strong. Half of them aren't. And, as a teenager, he should at least be aware that some of those acts came well before his time. So the chances of him remembering, and being completely driven insane by Aaron Carter or Smash Mouth, are slim at best.

It made for entertaining reading, but I wouldn't be surprised if 'George' was an old hand at this.

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Don't hold back, George, whatever you do...

Honestly, for just a highschooler he has all the articulation, cynicism and wit as that of your everyday edgy web-journalist. Hmm...

That aside, some of what he says does ring true - though I've never heard a 'K-Fed'/The Freecreditreport.com Band (wtf?) song - but, really, the majority of it is not the best of lists compiled.

'George' obviously doesn't like Miley/Jonas Brothers (and neither do I), but he's comparing them to '60's bands, and unfairly so. It's a given that some bands nowadays will pale in comparison to some '60's bands. Pitching Miley up against Pink Floyd and The Beatles is a no brainer.

He's talking about these acts as if they're world famous and still going strong. Half of them aren't. And, as a teenager, he should at least be aware that some of those acts came well before his time. So the chances of him remembering, and being completely driven insane by Aaron Carter or Smash Mouth, are slim at best.

It made for entertaining reading, but I wouldn't be surprised if 'George' was an old hand at this.

Freecreditreport is an annoying (IMO) ad they run in the states with this guy who's in a band singing at cheesy places because his credit is bad :lol:

I do agree that it's not fair to compare who he listed with 60s bands, especially the popstars like Miley. Some of the bands he listed, while I may not be a fan, I don't think I'd rank them the worst of the worst. But like any list, it's all subjective and I don't take them seriously.

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Freecreditreport is an annoying (IMO) ad they run in the states with this guy who's in a band singing at cheesy places because his credit is bad :lol:

I do agree that it's not fair to compare who he listed with 60s bands, especially the popstars like Miley. Some of the bands he listed, while I may not be a fan, I don't think I'd rank them the worst of the worst. But like any list, it's all subjective and I don't take them seriously.

Oo-er. I've heard adverts on US radio, and compared to ours, they go on for an age. That one would be enough to make me go crazy.

Aqua, George states at the bottom of his bitchfest that he's in high-school. Like hell he is. Was entertaining enough to read though.

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That was entertaining indeed. It pretty much sums a lot of what's wrong in the music industry. If you included mid 90's - present you would see the same crappy artistic trend.

Hanson - Jonas Brothers

Britney Spears - Jessica Simpson - Hillary Duff - Hannah Montana

Blink 182 - Sum 41 - Hedley - Fall Out Boy

and lets not forget the crap emanating from these reality tv shows (Pussy Cat Dolls, Daughtry, etc.)

...just to name a few.

I've mention elsewhere on this board that the music industry wasn't great (in my opinion) from 1984-1988 and even worse from 1995-present. Keep in mind, not everything is bad. There are still good bands/artists out there, but those on that list doesn't give me hope for the future.

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I think some terrific bands have emerged in the last 10-15 years, personally--best for ages.

Aqua, George states at the bottom of his bitchfest that he's in high-school. Like hell he is. Was entertaining enough to read though.

Yeah, that's what I meant--I found that strained the old credulity, too. (And agree that it was nevertheless quite entertaining.) It's like those TV shows/movies set in high schools where all the actors are obviously in their early 30s. :lol:

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That was entertaining indeed. It pretty much sums a lot of what's wrong in the music industry. If you included mid 90's - present you would see the same crappy artistic trend.

Hanson - Jonas Brothers

Britney Spears - Jessica Simpson - Hillary Duff - Hannah Montana

Blink 182 - Sum 41 - Hedley - Fall Out Boy

and lets not forget the crap emanating from these reality tv shows (Pussy Cat Dolls, Daughtry, etc.)

...just to name a few.

I've mention elsewhere on this board that the music industry wasn't great (in my opinion) from 1984-1988 and even worse from 1995-present. Keep in mind, not everything is bad. There are still good bands/artists out there, but those on that list doesn't give me hope for the future.

That's such a small part of what's out there musically now. The non-top 40 artists are plentiful and there's tons that are pretty amazing.

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I've mention elsewhere on this board that the music industry wasn't great (in my opinion) from 1984-1988 and even worse from 1995-present. Keep in mind, not everything is bad. There are still good bands/artists out there, but those on that list doesn't give me hope for the future.

I wouldn't even go by this list as for what hope there is for the future. As for the music periods you mention (84-88 and 95-present), my opinion would be vastly different. Some of my very favorite music comes from that period of the 80s (and the 80s in general) such as R.E.M., Guadalcanal Diary, the Replacements, the Cure, 10,000 Maniacs, Drivin' n' Cryin', the Blasters, Los Lobos, the list just goes on and on. Same for artists from '95 to the present. Of course it all depends on what your tastes are and how deep you want to dig for the music you like. I've never really had to go that far out of my way to find music that interests me but one thing is for sure, it's not all right there on the surface, nor should it have to be. That's part of the whole beauty of being a music fan, at least to me.

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I always asked myself this: every band from the 60's or 70's who sold tens of millions of discs is now regarded as a true pioneer of music, but nowadays, any band that sold that much is regarded as a disgrace to music. Why?

Edited by Xtazy
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On Miley Cyrus:

"She’s had an album released as both herself and Hanna Montana, and unlike Carter, both albums debuted at number one on the Billboard 100! In America, that gives her an honor held by Michael Jackson, Metallica, The Beatles, and even Pink Floyd!"

Haha, this is so true. I always just thought of the pop sensations as culturally irrelevant to anyone over the age of 11. I've never put it into a perspective like that. And after I read this, I can't help but agree with him: "How could allow that to happen?"

Although, to be honest, I'd have to say the same about Michael Jackson and Metallica.

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I always asked myself this: every band from the 60's or 70's who sold tens of millions of discs is now regarded as a true pioneer of music, but nowadays, any band that sold that much is regarded as a disgrace to music. Why?

Plus a lot of very ordinary bands from that era who rightfully faded into obscurity are now venerated just because they're from the 60s or 70s.

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Plus a lot of very ordinary bands from that era who rightfully faded into obscurity are now venerated just because they're from the 60s or 70s.

Are you thinking of anybody in particular? I'm not disputing your post; just curious who you had in mind.

Plus there were a lot of very ordinary bands in the 60s and 70s who faded into obscurity and stayed there. It's a hoot looking at the inside covers of Zep LPs and seeing all the weird, dorky stuff we totally ignore nowadays that was on Atlantic at the time. Although I gotta say...once we forget about all the weird, dorky stuff from the '00s, what's going to be left?

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