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Well my buddy is the one that put me in the awkward position. If it had ended at the party i would be fine. But when he interfered and got her number and said i would call that's when it hit the awkward territory. He put me in a bad position. Because not calling after that makes me look like a A-Hole. He was trying to force my hand and I wouldn't call just on general principle and because he made me look bad. . So now she thinks i got him to get her number because i was too shy and then i get the number and then don't even call. He made me look 20 times worse. And he has the nerve to be pissed off with me for not calling her.

Trust me, she doesn't think you're an a-hole, she thinks you're a gutless idiot. From her perspective, you were too shy to ask for her number, then after your buddy got it for you, you were still too scared to use it. You think you're proving some big point, but she sees you for what you are, a gutless twit. You think he made you look "so bad", but in actuality she probably would have thought it was kinda cute. Better to think you're a bit shy than totally gutless and wishy-washy.

Your way of seeing things is fascinating, and by fascinating, I mean bizarre. You are so off-base it's hilarious.

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Dude, don't take this personal. But this is high school shit. :rolleyes:

If you'd have just put your balls out there (not literally of course!) and been more aggressive, we wouldn't have all these entertaining, but sad threads.

Sometimes you just have to suck it up and be a man. B)

Literally might have been better.

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Why, SHE should be the one to feel awkward, scheming whore that she is. You played it perfectly, Spats, you can hold you head high and say "look here chicky, I don't play complicated games like that, you shoulda gotten some of THIS when you had the chance!"

Bonus points if he grabs his crotch as he says the word "this".

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Trust me, she doesn't think you're an a-hole, she thinks you're a gutless idiot. From her perspective, you were too shy to ask for her number, then after your buddy got it for you, you were still too scared to use it. You think you're proving some big point, but she sees you for what you are, a gutless twit. You think he made you look "so bad", but in actuality she probably would have thought it was kinda cute. Better to think you're a bit shy than totally gutless and wishy-washy.

Your way of seeing things is fascinating, and by fascinating, I mean bizarre. You are so off-base it's hilarious.

It's not because i a "gutless".

If my buddy had not interfered she would not think i am a "gutless idiot". If he had left well enough alone she would have just thought i wasn't interested. Or better yet she would have regreted not coming out and asking for the number. He has nerve being mad at me for not hooking up with her when he is to blame. Now he says i made him look bad by not calling her. he says he feels like he wants to apologize to her.:o

Either way because of this i can't even be friends with her now. because if i bumped in to her there would be no way to explain the whole thing.

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Dude, don't take this personal. But this is high school shit. :rolleyes:

If you'd have just put your balls out there (not literally of course!) and been more aggressive, we wouldn't have all these entertaining, but sad threads.

Sometimes you just have to suck it up and be a man. B)

It does look like highschool crap doesn't it? The dating world is a lot like highschool. I have seen the "be a man" line a lot. Does everyone really think if you don't want to be agressive and approach and get rejected you are not being a man?

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It does look like highschool crap doesn't it? The dating world is a lot like highschool. I have seen the "be a man" line a lot. Does everyone really think if you don't want to be agressive and approach and get rejected you are not being a man?

Yep, pretty much. :lol:

I used to be pretty shy, but that was WHEN I WAS A TEENAGER.

As you get older, you realize finally that if you really want something/someone bad enough, you do what it takes to pursue it until your goal is met. Rejection is a part of it sometimes, but so what? It only hurts for a few minutes, then you move on. Big deal.

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Yep, pretty much. :lol:

I used to be pretty shy, but that was WHEN I WAS A TEENAGER.

As you get older, you realize finally that if you really want something/someone bad enough, you do what it takes to pursue it until your goal is met. Rejection is a part of it sometimes, but so what? It only hurts for a few minutes, then you move on. Big deal.

Well you must have thick skin because rejection hasn't only hurt for a few minutes with me. it shaped my attitude and how i do things. Someone saying they have no interest in you is one of the worst things you can be told.

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Well you must have thick skin because rejection hasn't only hurt for a few minutes with me. it shaped my attitude and how i do things. Someone saying they have no interest in you is one of the worst things you can be told.

Would you rather have her fake it, then get stuck with someone you can't stand after a while? :rolleyes:

Let me tell you about the story of life.

It's called making choices. People choose what they want, and reject what they don't want. Everybody.

I know that there's a whole lotta women here (for example) that would definitely reject a date with me. Why? Because I'm an old fart and a smartass! But you see, that's OK! Because somewhere there is an older woman my age and dementia that I would get along famously with. This is just an example, of course. But do you get it yet?

You WILL be rejected, time and time again, until the right lady comes along and you get accepted. Live with it. We ALL do.

SUCK IT UP. :P

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No, it's not. Being told one of your closest friends is dead because they OD'd on heroin is one of the worst things you can be told.

Someone telling you they aren't interested in you is nothing.....NOTHING. Grow up.

Now THAT is putting things into perspective, for fuck's sakes!

Also finding out your fiance was killed by a drunk driver is one of the worst things you can be told. I had to live through that.

The rest is pretty fuckin' petty, isn't it?

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Of course, what continues to be lost in all this "I don't want to approach and be rejected" crap from Spats is that he didn't have to do any of that with the New Year's girl, knew he wouldn't be rejected, and STILL didn't get anywhere. Why you ask? Cuz SHE should have asked for HIS number, she was playing games.

So Spats' plan is really...

- Don't approach, can't be rejected that way

- If a girl is interested in him, she has to ask for his number, otherwise it's a game

So how DO you wind up with a girl, Spats? You're limiting your options a lot with your "principles"...

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No, it's not. Being told one of your closest friends is dead because they OD'd on heroin is one of the worst things you can be told.

Someone telling you they aren't interested in you is nothing.....NOTHING. Grow up.

You are right Elizabeth. Sorry about that. I get caught up in my own troubles sometimes.

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Now THAT is putting things into perspective, for fuck's sakes!

Also finding out your fiance was killed by a drunk driver is one of the worst things you can be told. I had to live through that.

The rest is pretty fuckin' petty, isn't it?

You are right. Me getting rejected is nothing compared to that. Sorry for your loss.

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Of course, what continues to be lost in all this "I don't want to approach and be rejected" crap from Spats is that he didn't have to do any of that with the New Year's girl, knew he wouldn't be rejected, and STILL didn't get anywhere. Why you ask? Cuz SHE should have asked for HIS number, she was playing games.

So Spats' plan is really...

- Don't approach, can't be rejected that way

- If a girl is interested in him, she has to ask for his number, otherwise it's a game

So how DO you wind up with a girl, Spats? You're limiting your options a lot with your "principles"...

You are right Matt. I have limited my options. But approaching just is not gonna work for me. My track record with that is brutal. Unless all of a sudden women from all over are gonna find my looks amazing now comapred to when i was a teen then the results are going to be similar. There have to be other options to avoid reliving my teen years.

I think if a girl is interested in me she should ask for the number. I don't think that's unreasonable to expect. If i was interested in a girl you would tell me to get the number. The same should apply to the girl that's interested. It's only fair. If she has the attitude that it's the guys' job then i want nothing to do with her anyways. That's game playing. if she is just shy then that's okay. But i haven't met many shy women.

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Would you rather have her fake it, then get stuck with someone you can't stand after a while? :rolleyes:

Let me tell you about the story of life.

It's called making choices. People choose what they want, and reject what they don't want. Everybody.

I know that there's a whole lotta women here (for example) that would definitely reject a date with me. Why? Because I'm an old fart and a smartass! But you see, that's OK! Because somewhere there is an older woman my age and dementia that I would get along famously with. This is just an example, of course. But do you get it yet?

You WILL be rejected, time and time again, until the right lady comes along and you get accepted. Live with it. We ALL do.

SUCK IT UP. :P

I get what you mean.

Don't get me wrong, i am not knocking the women for rejecting me. That's their right. I have rejected my share of women in the last bunch of years.

But i have buddies that rarely got rejected. Mostly because they are better looking than i am. So i don't think everyone gets rejected time after time until they score. Some have a great track record. I just think it would be too depressing to be getting shot down a lot until i am lucky. Even if i got rejected by a ton more women before i connected i don't think i could appreciate the woman that didn't reject, All i would be thinking about is the long line that rejected me. You know what i mean? How do you not let that bother you?

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I get what you mean.

Don't get me wrong, i am not knocking the women for rejecting me. That's their right. I have rejected my share of women in the last bunch of years.

But i have buddies that rarely got rejected. Mostly because they are better looking than i am. So i don't think everyone gets rejected time after time until they score. Some have a great track record. I just think it would be too depressing to be getting shot down a lot until i am lucky. Even if i got rejected by a ton more women before i connected i don't think i could appreciate the woman that didn't reject, All i would be thinking about is the long line that rejected me. You know what i mean? How do you not let that bother you?

But maybe it's not your looks that get you rejected? Maybe it's your personality....I know lots of chicks that date dudes who are not the best looking simply because the guy is "such a sweetheart".

I'm just saying.

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