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Relationship Status Update


Hotplant

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Again--who gives a flying FUCK what other people think!! My god, spats. No offense, but sometimes I wish I could just grab you by the shoulders and shake you REALLY HARD.....

That type of talk is turning me on. :D No, but seriously, i am just the type that is concerned with how thinks look or how i come across when i am out. I can be self concious that way. It wasn't fun being at the theatre alone because most everyone else were couples or in a group. That made me selfconcious. I didn't want anyone to think i was a loner or had no friends or anything.

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Like asking for New Years girl's phone #?

I guess most guys would have ignored her "it's the guys' job" attitude that she had. But i hate that attitude with a passion and could not be with a girl who has it. I just can't help that Matt. If i can't stand that attitude then i would go crazy being with a woman who had it.

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How do you know it was an "attitude" she has? Maybe she was just shy about asking? Seems you are too...

So to summarize...you refuse to be with someone who can't ask for a number, and expects the other person to do it. So if every girl had that attitude, you'd be alone forever, since that perfectly describes you. Correct?

Oh, and apparently not cured. Nevermind.

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How do you know it was an "attitude" she has? Maybe she was just shy about asking? Seems you are too...

So to summarize...you refuse to be with someone who can't ask for a number, and expects the other person to do it. So if every girl had that attitude, you'd be alone forever, since that perfectly describes you. Correct?

Oh, and apparently not cured. Nevermind.

Dude, i hung out with her almost that whole night. She wasn't shy. She was the one that initiated the converation in the first place. I was minding my own business. If she had not have done that nothing would have happened. We would never have said two words to each other because i wouldn't have initiated the conversation because she wasn't the type i am normally attracted to. And she was the one that came over to say goodbye at the end of night and started the hinting.

Shy?????? :blink::blink::blink:

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How do you know what her attitude was? You never actually sat down and had a decent conversation with her. Do you even know her name?

Of course i know her name. We talked for a lot of the night. I actually spent more time with her than any of my buddies that night. And she wasn't shy so that couldn't have been the problem.

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I guess most guys would have ignored her "it's the guys' job" attitude that she had. But i hate that attitude with a passion and could not be with a girl who has it. I just can't help that Matt. If i can't stand that attitude then i would go crazy being with a woman who had it.

:rolleyes:

If a girl wanting you to be the one to approach her (or make the first phone call) is a deal breaking issue for you, you might as well give up on the idea of being in a relationship. Obviously you have absolutely no flexibility and absolutely no ability to cope with anything even remotely relationship related.

Maybe its time you just admit it, spats.. you don't want a relationship with a real woman. Real women.. real people.. have flaws, and that is simply not acceptable to you. I think you'd be better off with an inflatable doll. Your inflatable doll girlfriend can be whatever you want her to be; and as a bonus, she wont ever want to go down on you, and you wont ever have to go down on her! She wont play games with you; you wont have to worry about giving or getting phone numbers and making phone calls; and she won't ever make you feel like she's smarter than you (uhh.. hopefully).

Oh,.. wait a minute,.. :unsure: ..

you would always have to be the one to approach her though.

Dammit spats! You're even too dysfunctional to have a relationship with a blow-up doll! slapface.gif

:P

:lol:

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Maybe she fears rejection, it was a problem for her in high school.

I guess that's a possibility. :blink::blink:

But how many girls ever risk getting rejected by guys? Back in highschool none of the girls at my school ever asked guys out. It just didn't happen. It wasn't until college that i started seeing women do that or i experienced it. And you say it all the time, most women refuse to do the asking because they think the guy should do it.

Then add on to it the fact that most guys will not reject an attractive girl that asks them out. The rejection factor for girls is almost non existant.

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I never said physical attraction isn't important. If you had an inkling of maturity or

insight, you'd realize that physical attraction isn't just about someone being "hot".

Sometimes it's her eyes.. or her smile.. or her hair.. or any number of other features or characteristics that you might find attractive about a woman.. even if overall she might not considered "hot".

And fyi,.. relationships are not about "first impressions". What can you really tell about someone based solely on first impressions based on their looks? Answer: not much,.. if anything. You say "being impressed" by a woman's "looks" is the only reason that you'd want to get to know someone better? Not only is that immature and piggish of you, but what if that same standard was applied to you by women looking at you? Would any woman be "impressed" enough by your looks to want to get to know you better?

It would seem to me that since you don't wanna be "rejected" based on your looks, maybe you wouldn't be going around being so focused on other peoples' looks. I'd think you'd maybe have some sensitivity and insight into the fact that a person's looks don't tell the story of who that person is. But hey, that's just what I'd think; obviously you don't think that way.

I'm gonna say this as delicately as I can, while also respecting you enough to be very direct with you, spats: It's quite apparent to me that you are incredibly shallow, immature, and obtuse. That's why you can't get a date, and that's why even if you do get a date someday, there's not likely going to be a second date.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again:

You need therapy, dude.

Lots of therapy.

The sooner the better.

:hippy:

What about your attitude toward women is unappealing?

For starters.. everything.

If you "get along with most women", as you claim you do, then how come you can't get a date to save your life? huh.gif And how come you never ever reference what your women friends tell you about women and relationships but instead constantly talk about what your idiot-sounding "buddies" tell you about women and relationships? Huh? :whistling:

Fwiw,.. I am pulling for you to get a date someday, bud. :cheer:

I can't wait to hear how.. uhh.. well it goes! :thumbsup:

Here's a bit of advise for ya in the unlikely event that you do get a date:

Do NOT talk about how wounded you are from your childhood rejection.

Do NOT talk about how you don't like to give or get oral sex.

Do NOT talk about what your "buddies" have told you.. about anything.

Do NOT talk about your "I don't like game playing" game playing rules.

Do NOT tell her you "just want someone to hang out with" and hold hands with.

Ok? ;)

:beer:

Okay, it think i understand what you mean about the looks situation. I can't relate to it personally though. But whatever floats one's boat. I wouldn't be able to hook up with a girl if the only think i found physically attractive about her was her smile or eyes or whatever. She would have to have more things that i was physically attracted to.

I realize relationhips are not about first impressions but when you are out on the dating scene you are more likely going to want to get to know a person you are physically attracted to than to a girl you aren't. I think most people are like that. You will be more eager to get to know the person you are more attracted to physically. That doesn't mean i won't hang out with a girl who isn't hot or want to get to know them. I just wouldn't be looking for them to be my girlfriend. Just a friend maybe.

Dude, i CAN get a date. I have told before that have got approached in the recent past and the New Years girl was interested. So the interest has been there. But the girls i have been getting approached by are not girls i would really wanna hook up with. Just not really my type. And i have gone over the News girls already and why that didn't happen.

i have female friends but the reason i don't go to them for advice anymore is because for the most part the have the attitudes that i can't stand. They believe that the guy should do the approaching. They say they wouldn't even feel feminine if they asked a guy out. It would just seem unatrual to them. They want to be swept off their feet by a guy. they want the flowers, etc,etc. I don't have many cool female friends. A few of them are cool but not many. And they also say they want the nice sweet guys and they end up with the opposite. I am gonna take advice from them?? And there are things i can talk about with my guy friends that i can't talk about with them

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And i have gone over the News girls already and why that didn't happen.

Right, and we all think your view on that was/is ridiculous, hence why this conversation goes on and on.

i have female friends but the reason i don't go to them for advice anymore is because for the most part the have the attitudes that i can't stand. They believe that the guy should do the approaching. They say they wouldn't even feel feminine if they asked a guy out. It would just seem unatrual to them. They want to be swept off their feet by a guy. they want the flowers, etc,etc. I don't have many cool female friends. A few of them are cool but not many. And they also say they want the nice sweet guys and they end up with the opposite. I am gonna take advice from them??

In other words, they're pretty normal as far as chicks go. We get it, you don't like how most girls are, and aren't willing to deal with it. But by definition that limits your options GREATLY.

Sorry to say it Spats, but there are not many girls out there, IF ANY, who fit your criteria, and would be willing to put up with your way of doing things and the way you see things. That's why we've been going in circles with you forever, trying to make you see that. But you aren't willing to change. Fine, then quit bitching.

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Right, and we all think your view on that was/is ridiculous, hence why this conversation goes on and on.

In other words, they're pretty normal as far as chicks go. We get it, you don't like how most girls are, and aren't willing to deal with it. But by definition that limits your options GREATLY.

Sorry to say it Spats, but there are not many girls out there, IF ANY, who fit your criteria, and would be willing to put up with your way of doing things and the way you see things. That's why we've been going in circles with you forever, trying to make you see that. But you aren't willing to change. Fine, then quit bitching.

There are cool girls out there. They are just not the majority. Most are like my female friends unfortunately. So it is an uphill battle.

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What's wrong with wanting flowers from a guy? I think it's really sweet.

I think ALL girls think that's sweet. But do you need the guy to give them to you? Could you live happily without them? I would hope so.

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Who said I couldn't live happily without flowers? I never said otherwise. Don't put words in my mouth. Just because I said I thought it was sweet and would appreciate a guy giving them to me doesn't mean I expect anything out him other than what any woman would expect from one; respect, love, honesty, etc,.

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Okay, it think i understand what you mean about the looks situation. I can't relate to it personally though. But whatever floats one's boat. I wouldn't be able to hook up with a girl if the only think i found physically attractive about her was her smile or eyes or whatever. She would have to have more things that i was physically attracted to.

Uhh.. no spats,.. I'd say you don't get it.

..at all. :rolleyes:

[Are you really this obtuse? :blink: ]

Allow me to clarify (not that I hold out any hope that you'll get it this time either): I didn't say the eyes or smile or whatever would be " the only thing" you found attractive; I was suggesting that a woman's eyes or hair or smile or any number of other features or characteristics (her laugh; the way she walks; the way she dresses; the way she dances; the sound of her voice; the way she smells; etc, etc, etc) can be the attraction that sparks an initial interest.. even if she is not necessarily someone you might consider "hot" at first glance.

Another thing you obviously have no clue about, spats, is that when you fall in love with someone, they are "hot" in your eyes.. even if you didn't find them hot upon "first impression", and even if no one else in the world considers them "hot". But don't pull a brain muscle trying to grasp that concept just yet, dude; you're waaaaaay too shallow and immature to to comprehend that at this point.

Maybe after you've had some therapy though.. ;)

:hippy:

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There are cool girls out there. They are just not the majority. Most are like my female friends unfortunately. So it is an uphill battle.

Oh, the irony!

:hysterical:

Trying to clue you in is the mother of all uphill battles, muh-man! :P

:lol:

I said it before, spats, and I'll say it again..

YOU

spatsnerd.jpg

know nothing about cool.

;)

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