kirchzep27 Posted January 18, 2008 Share Posted January 18, 2008 It's really touching reading about so many of you being so happy with your partners I hear so many people married and all they do is complain. It's nice to hear this. There are 87 million single people in america, saw it on tv this morning. i guess its a huge part of our culture by now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dzldoc Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 So happily married that it makes everyone we know sick! Here comes the sappy part... My wife and daughter are the light of my life! Been around the block and had my fun as well as heart breaks. Started a family pretty late compared to most and it's been the blessing of my life. If it all ended tomorrow, I wouldn't change a moment of it. (btw, Manders is right) Same here, started kinda late, got my ya ya's out. I was living on the westbank she on the east. We met on a river boat in the middle of the mighty Mississippi in 80, married in 88, had first and prob. only son in 98. To spats: a pretty face don't make no pretty heart! I consider mine pretty. I've met prettier but were the ugliest inside, met plain janes that were the most joyful and pleasant ladies i've known. When you get old and grey and the pretty face is gone the beautiful heart is still beautiful. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
songbird Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 A pretty, cool, modern women who isn't into drama or games is that rare? Don't say that. I am still trying to be hopeful. I hate drama and games, but I'm not pretty... guess I'm screwed! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ninelives Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 I hate drama and games, but I'm not pretty... guess I'm screwed! You are very pretty so stop that thought right now! Drama and games never works in relationships in the long run so good to hate them! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JethroTull Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 I married for the first time in 2001 at the age of 46. Don't let your family/friends/co-workers pressure you to get married. Just do it when and if you are ready. Be prepared to learn new things about your spouse after the vows. Shortly after marriage, I discovered my wife hates answering the telephone. She can play telephone tag with friends for months. When we dated, she answered the phone on one or two rings. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Idunn Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 I hate drama and games, but I'm not pretty... guess I'm screwed! Personally, I find beauty in very ordinary, "ugly" things. Rainbows do nothing for me, but a mud puddle often moves me to tears. We each have a different gauge as to what we find beautiful. Don't make the mistake of assuming the gauge you judge YOURSELF by is the same gauge other judge you by. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dzldoc Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 I married for the first time in 2001 at the age of 46. Don't let your family/friends/co-workers pressure you to get married. Just do it when and if you are ready. Be prepared to learn new things about your spouse after the vows. Shortly after marriage, I discovered my wife hates answering the telephone. She can play telephone tag with friends for months. When we dated, she answered the phone on one or two rings. "BINGO" give this man a prize. People get married for the wrong reasons. Men get married hoping she won't change and women get married hoping he will change. Ladies, don't bait and switch. Guys don't be assholes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dzldoc Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 I hate drama and games, but I'm not pretty... guess I'm screwed! Don't sell yourself short. Your as beautiful as you feel. Doesn't matter what others think in the grand scheme of things. In the end we all will gravitate towards a beautiful heart. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shadowlongerthansoul Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 Personally, I find beauty in very ordinary, "ugly" things. Rainbows do nothing for me, but a mud puddle often moves me to tears. We each have a different gauge as to what we find beautiful. Don't make the mistake of assuming the gauge you judge YOURSELF by is the same gauge other judge you by. Very nice philosophy. I have always been good looking, but it's a double edged sword. People automatically think they can take advantage of you, and then dump you because you will find someone else easily. What someone looks like in no way reflects how they feel on a personal, emotional and grey matter level. Or what they are looking for. People dont ask out gorgeous people much, simply because they are afraid of a rejection. Does that make sense? IOW, pretty is common, you can have a lil nip/tuck and more anywhere you wish. But the sure as heck cannot do anything about your mind short of brainwashing you. Shad w Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shadowlongerthansoul Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 QUOTE (JethroTull @ Jan 18 2008, 08:04 PM) I married for the first time in 2001 at the age of 46. Don't let your family/friends/co-workers pressure you to get married. Just do it when and if you are ready. Be prepared to learn new things about your spouse after the vows. Shortly after marriage, I discovered my wife hates answering the telephone. She can play telephone tag with friends for months. When we dated, she answered the phone on one or two rings. "BINGO" give this man a prize. People get married for the wrong reasons. Men get married hoping she won't change and women get married hoping he will change. Ladies, don't bait and switch. Guys don't be assholes -------------------- "No Matter Where You Go- There You Are" ( Buckaroo Banzi ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shadowlongerthansoul Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 QUOTE (JethroTull @ Jan 18 2008, 08:04 PM) I married for the first time in 2001 at the age of 46. Don't let your family/friends/co-workers pressure you to get married. Just do it when and if you are ready. Be prepared to learn new things about your spouse after the vows. Shortly after marriage, I discovered my wife hates answering the telephone. She can play telephone tag with friends for months. When we dated, she answered the phone on one or two rings. "BINGO" give this man a prize. People get married for the wrong reasons. Men get married hoping she won't change and women get married hoping he will change. Ladies, don't bait and switch. Guys don't be assholes Very good post. Nothing hurts more than the bait and switch routine. All it really proves is you dont care about anything but your happiness and who you f**ck next. Shad w -------------------- "No Matter Where You Go- There You Are" ( Buckaroo Banzi ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spats Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 "BINGO" give this man a prize. People get married for the wrong reasons. Men get married hoping she won't change and women get married hoping he will change. Ladies, don't bait and switch. Guys don't be assholes Exactly. You see the REAL person after you are married. Try living together before you decide to get married. my buddies have found this out. Their wives were more easygoing when they were just dating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Electrophile Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 Oh God. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spats Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 Same here, started kinda late, got my ya ya's out. I was living on the westbank she on the east. We met on a river boat in the middle of the mighty Mississippi in 80, married in 88, had first and prob. only son in 98. To spats: a pretty face don't make no pretty heart! I consider mine pretty. I've met prettier but were the ugliest inside, met plain janes that were the most joyful and pleasant ladies i've known. When you get old and grey and the pretty face is gone the beautiful heart is still beautiful. I know what you mean. i have met some very pretty girls who were not nice. All the way back to high school. And i have met girls who were plain and really nice. I want a girl who is Pretty on the outside and inside. The whole package. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
manderlyh Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 I hate drama and games, but I'm not pretty... guess I'm screwed! NICOLE! You are beautiful! What the hell are you talking about? You're also very smart and thoughtful, not to mention great taste in music. ***** I say that if you're going to get married, make sure you know the person. All the manipulation ploy stories I'm hearing aren't too plausible in my opinion. If someone marries you and then tries to change you, they were probably trying to change you all along. Just make sure you're sure before you take the plunge. Date for longer than a year before getting married, etc. Not that I'm married or anything...but you know...it pays to be sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spats Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 NICOLE! You are beautiful! What the hell are you talking about? You're also very smart and thoughtful, not to mention great taste in music. ***** I say that if you're going to get married, make sure you know the person. All the manipulation ploy stories I'm hearing aren't too plausible in my opinion. If someone marries you and then tries to change you, they were probably trying to change you all along. Just make sure you're sure before you take the plunge. Date for longer than a year before getting married, etc. Not that I'm married or anything...but you know...it pays to be sure. That's why i think a couple should live together first. Then you know what you are getting yourself into and if you can live with person. if then you find something about them that you can't live with then you can just move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Electrophile Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 Unless the person fucks animals, kills children or boils puppies, I can't imagine something so horrendous that you can't live with them and therefore must break up with them. My parents have been married 36 years on Tuesday, and they both do things the other person isn't fond of, but they get over it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shadowlongerthansoul Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 Exactly. You see the REAL person after you are married. Try living together before you decide to get married. my buddies have found this out. Their wives were more easygoing when they were just dating. To be quite honest with you I dont think I will ever trust anyone, ever again///but thats just me I guess. When you run across a Sociopath you may see what I mean. Some people just wet their crotches hurting others. That sounds sick but it's true. There are people on the loose that would as soon stab you and throw you in a ditch as to look at you. To them you are their competition (food chain), you have no intrinsic value whatsoever. Shad w Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shadowlongerthansoul Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 Don't sell yourself short. Your as beautiful as you feel. Doesn't matter what others think in the grand scheme of things. In the end we all will gravitate towards a beautiful heart. I'm up with the cat, looking into becoming an alcoholic. Cute kitty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
manderlyh Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 I live with my boyfriend, and we've lived together for almost four years. We've been together for almost seven years. By the time we moved in together, we knew each other so well that we already knew what we did and didn't like about each other. Granted--we were forced to deal with it in a different manner than if we didn't live together, but we KNEW each other beforehand. I knew his cluster-fuck messiness would drive me crazy, he knew that my orderly neatness would drive him crazy...slowly, after four years of cohabitation, we've learned how to deal with things that drive us crazy about the other. It's a matter of picking your battles. what is really worth bitching and moaning and complaining about? Something that a person can't change (like personality quirks and who they are) or their actions? I find very few things that my boyfriend does that irritates me bad enough to fight over. Why even try unless it's something that REALLY matters? (BTW--things that really matter to me are respect and honesty. If there is a violation in those things, expect an all-out brawl...and I bite and pull hair! ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spats Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 Unless the person fucks animals, kills children or boils puppies, I can't imagine something so horrendous that you can't live with them and therefore must break up with them. My parents have been married 36 years on Tuesday, and they both do things the other person isn't fond of, but they get over it. It's a different thing when you live together and see each other 24/7 as opposed to just dating. a couple years ago a buddy was living with a girlfriend and they couldn't even sleep in the same room because he snored like a son of a B**ch. it was driving her crazy. You can find out all sorts of things about a person living with. Good and bad. and then you can decide if you can put up with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
manderlyh Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 But if you date for long enough prior to moving in...you should know them well enough before moving in together to know that kind of stuff that drives you crazy. I sleep in the spare bedroom when my boyfriend snores like a son of a bitch. Or on the couch...(which is strange, considering we have three other beds...) And I have to agree with Electrophile--I wouldn't be with someone who f*&^s animals, kills children or boils puppies! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spats Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 But if you date for long enough prior to moving in...you should know them well enough before moving in together to know that kind of stuff that drives you crazy. I sleep in the spare bedroom when my boyfriend snores like a son of a bitch. Or on the couch...(which is strange, considering we have three other beds...) And I have to agree with Electrophile--I wouldn't be with someone who f*&^s animals, kills children or boils puppies! I have thankfully never dated a girl that snored. Ugh. I wouldn't be able to put up with that. Snoring just sounds so awful. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Electrophile Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 I've dated guys that snored. I dislike it, but since snoring is such a stupid trivial fucking thing, I don't think about it as some major thing that would make me dump the guy. Just be quiet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
manderlyh Posted January 19, 2008 Share Posted January 19, 2008 I snore. I have sinus problems. 'Tis a good thing I snore...I repel men with my super snores! ROFL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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