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Posted (edited)

Ok so I got bored

There's nothing worse than a papercut

There's Nothing Worse Than ....

1. ...being served fish and chips by a lady with 9 false nails. *Crunch*

2. ...those word "verification" images that you have absolutely no chance of interpreting.

3. ...being just beaten to the bar by people that then proceed to faff.

4. ...telling the checkout lady that no, you don't need help packing, and then spending minutes fiddling with the plastic bag and being completely unable to open it.

5. ...the sound of nail clippers. Is it just me, or is this one of the most terrible sounds?!

6. ...being told I looked "lost" in Blockbuster. I wasn't lost, I was just browsing. Dagnammit.

7. ...picking an apparently innocuous scab and nearly bleeding to death.

8. ...finding that your banana and kiwi have been obliterated at the bottom of your bag.

9. ...when people put library books upside down on the shelf.

10. ...walking up and down the end-of-aisle lane in Sainsbury's trying to find the quickest-looking queue, and ignoring the "basket-only" queues because they are huge, and then watching the "basket-only" queue disappear within seconds as you are trapped behind fumblers and dawdlers

12. ...people who hold up the commuters by standing IN the ticket barrier trying to find their ticket.

13. ...discovering that you have been walking down the street flying low, and wondering how many people noticed.

14. ... the 'toothpaste cough', the awful tickly cough you sometimes get after brushing your teeth at night.

15. ...walking back and forth in front of an automatic door like a loony trying to get out the shop before being told by a staff worker that it is broken.

16. ...forgetting on numerous shopping trips whether you have any toothpaste and ending up with 9 tubes in the bathroom cupboard.

17. ...sneezing on a full bladder whilst pregnant and wearing light trousers.

18. ...being pooped on by a pigeon, and knowing that the people behind on the platform observed it all. What could I do but stand there quietly, pretending nothing had happened, grimacing as I felt it trickling down the back of my head.

19. ...hoovers. I hate the things in every way. The way they get caught on everything, the way the lead always runs out of length. The way they remind you how dusty everything gets in just a week. The way they always need emptying.

20. ...losing my glasses and being unable to see clearly enough to find them, scrambling around the flat like a mole.

21. ...battling in vain with a supermarket's self-service system as it fails to recognise every other item you throw at it, while a crowd of impatient customers wait behind you, grumbling and snorting with impatience and frustration.

22. ...a bad Thursday.

23. ...cheap toilet paper in an expensive hotel (you'd expect quilted...).

24. ...taking a bath mat to the gym (grabbed in a hurry because it looks like a towel) instead of a towel

25. ...having to struggle through a minute and half of awkward polite conversation in a lift with someone just because you both know you're from the same office.

26. ...heading down the local bakery to buy fresh croissants for breakfast, and then finding it closed because it is Good Friday.

27. ...forking out 83 pence on a can of Coke and then finding you don't have quite enough change for the ticket machine. And why 83 pence?!

28. ...going against your wife's advice that the 'large chips' was too large, and then failing miserably to finish the large chips.

29. ...walking past an empty fish and chip shop on the way to a cash machine, heading back with some cash to find that it has filled up with tourists.

30. ...waiting (starving) in the supermarket queue for 10 minutes just buy a Mars, while surrounded by posters boasting at being the first self-service supermarket in Britain (neglecting to explain why it is not self-service enabled now, or why there are so few till staff).

31. ...washing up sieves, the way tiny pieces of food grip stubbornly to the tiny holes. Who would have thought that such a useful tool as the sieve would be such a stressful thing to clean? I simply refuse to wash them up anymore.

32. ...being repeatedly rung up by a kitchen company because you got a quote 6 months ago, even though you have repeatedly told them that you now have a kitchen (which you are very pleased with), and even though you have repeatedly demanded that they ring you no more.

33. ...babysitting a hyperactive child with a tin whistle.

34. ...being chased barefooted across a field of upturned plugs by a mad dog.

35. ...trying to read a broadsheet in an overcrowded train.

36. ...burning my last chicken and mushroom pie to a cinder whilst browsing this website...

37. ...having to replace your torch batteries on a dark night.

38. ...asking someone to repeat the question for the third time.

39. ...eating ash for dinner after cooking a microwave meal for half as long as it said on the pack.

40. ...a screaming child in the quiet coach on the train home on a Friday.

41. ...being unable to check you're "clean" after a nose blow in a public place.

42. ...finding on Monday that you didn't empty your lunch box of yoghurt, over ripe fruit, and cheese on Friday.

43. ...minding your own business on your bike and crashing and burning in front 200 school girls.

44. ...feeling "that" pang in your bowels.

45. ...having an over-active, needy, and huggy child be in your way when you're desperate to empty your bladder.

46. ... trying to find oyster sauce in a supermarket.

47. ...trying to explain what "refined kidney beans" are to a confused local shop owner who first and second languages aren't English.

48. ...ever-so-slightly-off coleslaw.

49. ...splash back.

50. ...brushing your shoulders...straightening your tie...doing up your jacket...and then tripping over a loose paving slab.

51. ... lots of wee on the seat of a public loo.

52. ...getting a nose bleed while rushing to leave the house and wearing a white jumper.

53. ...losing my glasses and being unable to see clearly enough to find them.

54. ...trying to find a pen in a hurry.

55. ...being desperate for the loo in town, and knowing that most public loos will be closed due to vandals or tomfoolery, and any that aren't closed should be for hygiene and safety reasons - as we all know there is nothing worse than British public loos anyway, except Ukrainian public loos, but that is another story...

56. ...walking up a steep stony beach.

57. ...walking into locked 'push' doors in full view of other people.

58. ...grit under a contact lens.

59. ...being bitten by a gerbil.

60. ...supermarket gift card selections.

61. ...Gym membership.

62. ...eating spaghetti bolognese at other people's houses.

63. ...music shops that don't order their CDs by genre.

64. ... the piercing and reverberating sound of small children squealing in a subway.

65. ...getting soap on my toothbrush and not realising till its too late.

66. ... idiots on public transport that have nothing better to do than cycle through their polyphonic (bling - init) ring tones.

67. ...trying to get melted cheese off a towel.

68. ...a) catastrophically stubbing your bare vulnerable toe on a brutish hard metal object while getting ready. B) knowing that you'll sound lame if you say that's the reason why you're late.

69. ... people who think the narrow staircases and walkways of the tube were made for them and their slow, meandering, walking pace.

70. ...people who can't comprehend that the sound of an arriving tube might provoke some in the crowd behind them to want to hurry.

71. ...being snotted on in public due to someone else's over zealous sneeze! and them not realising the trauma they've created! (actually happened)

72. ...finding a pube on your desert at a friend's house.

73. ...riding a bus to college in the early hours of the morning whist having to put up with loud, hyperactive children who are eating cheese and chives crisps.

74. ... getting stuck in the bathroom in someone else's house.

75. ...taking a bite of a fantastic steak and tomato sandwich, and then spilling tomato all down your front.

76. ...trying to cut a well-cooked steak with a butter knife.

77. ...dropping a bag containing 6 cartons of stinking UHT milk, which then splits, turning the kitchen floor into a foul lake of off milk.

78. ...constantly almost sneezing, but never quite making it, a sort of sneezing constipation.

79. ... going sky-diving and, when you pull the parachute cord, watching nothing but your brother's maths textbooks spill out of the opening in your back-pack.

80. ...buying a new toothbrush and finding its handle is slightly wider than standard, and so doesn't fit in the bathroom's toothbrush holder...why oh why?

81. ...waking up and thinking "I feel unusually refreshed for a Thursday morning...wait a second, it's far sunnier than usual, is this a Saturday? Wait, it is definitely not a Saturday, oh pants, I recognise that sinking feeling in my gut, I've overslept..."

82. ...having a video project urgently due to be handed in and having the misfortune of asking technical assistance from a complete nincompoop who, after admitting that he has no idea how to use the editing program that you need help with, insists on spending half an hour trying to figure it out ON YOUR COMPUTER, masterfully humming and hawing his way through everything you've already tried while you sit there writhing and nodding your way through valuable minutes as you try and deduce a strategy to politely recapture your ravaged machine.

83. ... subtitles that are just slightly too small to read without squinting.

84. ...headaches caused by squinting to read small subtitles.

85. ...attempting to drop some chewed gum into your bin, watching it miss and role out into the walkway in front of a passing colleague.

86. ... taking your squash stuff down from the train luggage rack in the crowded rush hour and watching your spare boxers fall out into the aisle.

87. ...taking a bite of an egg-mayonnaise sandwich and crunching a piece of egg shell.

88. ...pedestrians that walk in front of you just as the light turns green.

89. ...spitting while jogging and getting the spit back in your face.

90. ...after-leak in summer trousers.

91. ...getting the first part of a span text, then getting a message with 'Text missing'...

92. ...jeans that chafe.

93. ...itchy clothes labels.

94. ...slow dramas with Robert Redford in.

95. ...loos that not only have the light switch outside, but on a timer that is set for an unreasonably short time.

96. ...trying to get women somewhere on time.

97. ...coffee mugs with handles so small you can't even use them properly.

98. ...taking your jumper off in a public place and displaying your tummy.

99. ...nails on the blackboard.

100. ...trying to have a private and personal conversation with someone in a slightly-too-quiet-for-comfort cafe.

101. ...being Humpty Dumpty.

102. ...accidentally using someone else's toothbrush.

103. ...forms that don't leave even close to enough space in the gaps.

104. ...Martin Creed's exhibit which is a recording of Martin blowing raspberries into a microphone for 9 minutes at a volume loud enough to be heard around the entire floor of the Tate gallery and then repeated on circular.

105. ... being unable to read the paper because of a loud argument about popodoms in the background.

106. ...someone who has poor spacial awareness wearing a giant rucksack trying to navigate round a small and crowded coffee shop.

107. ...getting my work pass tangled up in my keys every day

108. ...being asked if you want anything else with your coffee when you only ordered a coffee because you only wanted a coffee!

109. ...jumping out of your skin because an old man has crept up behind you and sung loudly in your ear.

110. ...going to the bank to cash a cheque and getting served by a trainee on his first day on the job.

111. ...running out of loo paper, and then finding that you have managed to buy kitchen roll at the local shop instead of loo paper!

112. ...people that don't understand the concept of the queue, and who form a split in the queue causing all manner of confusion, and then seem to convince themselves that their queue is the right one.

113. ...trying to find a tea spoon in a strange kitchen.

114. ... a loo holder so far behind the loo that you have to swivel every time you need more.

115. ...being unable to stop giggling in church after you bit into an orange piece and squirted the people in front of you.

116. ...being unable to get the whole yoghurt lid off.

117. ...being unable to wash your hands in the cinema toilets because the three basins are taken up by three chaps washing their feet (you don't believe me?!)

118. ...people who chat to cashiers when there is a huge queue behind them.

119. ...being made to feel stupid by a colleague for a tiny decision made under pressure in a week when the only staff with the required knowledge were on holiday and when any sane person would have made the same decision under the circumstances.

120. ...leaving the house and then needing to go.

Please add your own :P

Edited by Conneyfogle
Posted

people who think that they're so great when, in reality, they're not that great or are flat out losers...

politicians who are dishonest, can't keep promises, and/or do nothing in bad sitiuations...

massive headaches...

having to stop one of your fave songs/movies/music videos three or more times because someone demands that you listen to them talk to you, even if it's something you care little or absolutely nothing about...

Already I feel better after venting! :lol::P

Posted (edited)

There's nothing worse than 'Buffering'

Sitting on chewing gum

sitting at home on a quiet sunny afternoon, when some twat comes passed in a boyracer car with UNCE UNCE UNCE boing boing blaring out of the stereo

Edited by Conneyfogle
Posted

sitting at home on a quiet sunny afternoon, when some twat comes passed in a boyracer car with UNCE UNCE UNCE boing boing blaring out of the stereo

That's when I wish I had an RPG handy. <_<

Barking dogs.

That's when I wish I had an RPG handy.

B)

Posted

When 14 year olds that have no mental disabilities at all (as proved by a doctor) act like they are 5 years old, except more immature.. There's a kid like that I have to hang out with (family friend) and he does just that. I could explain him for hours, but no point really.

Posted

When 14 year olds that have no mental disabilities at all (as proved by a doctor) act like they are 5 years old, except more immature.

But they know EVERYTHING!! :lol:

Posted

That's when I wish I had an RPG handy. <_<

Barking dogs.

That's when I wish I had an RPG handy.

B)

Barking dogs !!! I forgot that one, there is NOTHING worse than that :angry:

apart from barking dogs and screaming children :blink:

Posted

going in a public restroom to take a shit

and not more than 10 seconds, some fucker

comes and sits in the stall next to you.

pouring a big bowl of cereal and finding out

the milk has soured.

breaking a shoe lace when you're already late.

car breakdowns at anytime.

Posted

.....when I'm trying to fall asleep in the dark and I can hear a mosquito buzzing around my ear. Can't see him cuz its dark and are afraid now to fall asleep for fear of waking up scratching welts the size of Texas.

(my hubby will get up, turn on all the lights and hunt the little blood sucker down so we can sleep in peace)

Posted

Wow you really were bored :lol:

The self-service one I know <_<. Oh and the Sainsbury-yeh bin there, done that. <_<

Another self-sevice one is when you scan an item and it immediatly says "wait for the supivisor" Im like "what the hell for?!"

A bus leaving 3 mins early or leaving JUST as you arrive.

A miserble bus driver. Is it just me or do bus drivers just never look happy.

For me a curry that is not spicy.

When you queue in a supermarket at the checkout and as it comes to you, the person closes the desk <_<

Trying to open a clear door by pulling when you're meant to push :bagoverhead:

Walking into a clear door :whistling: just laughed that one off.

Ordering a COKE and getting a PEPSI-if I want a coke I want a friggin coke-and yes there is a difference. <_<

if you don't have coke, just tell me and I'll order somthing else. <_<

Getting splinters in your feet.

Wearing shoes that are too small or too big.

Hot porridge.

Drinking a hot drink and getting a flakey tounge

Watching something funny or hearing something funny when you're drinking.

Spilling red wine on a cream carpet :whistling:

:D:D:D:

Posted (edited)

I agree with Lucia on most of her list. :D

burning your tongue...

having someone unattractive pop into your head when you're thinking of someone who is attractive :whistling: ...

searching all over YouTube for a video that is kind of hard to find, then, when you do find it, the quality is crappy...

concerts videos shot by nonprofessional cameras(sorry, but the quality is usually crap)...

not being able to read the subtitles on the Japanese Sailor Moon epsiodes :P ....

small children who think they're so smart and mature when they're not....

finding a vinyl record you really want, but it's in crappy condition...

nasty people...

having a numb butt and legs after sitting in the car during a long drive :lol: ...

Edited by pagemccartney95
Posted

Barking dogs !!! I forgot that one, there is NOTHING worse than that :angry:

apart from barking dogs and screaming children :blink:

I have a young male cat who is now into the all night yowling mood (He's horny). He WILL be neutered soon. But I refuse to let him out because of obvious reasons....Cat overpopulation, fighting, and the awful diseases they can pick up.

:mellow:

Posted

TNWT...having to give a disclaimer on the dinner about to be served because you realize you have a broken fingernail and are not sure when or where you may have broken it. :bagoverhead:

Posted

going in a public restroom to take a shit

and not more than 10 seconds, some fucker

comes and sits in the stall next to you.

To hell with 'em, just let it rip.

:D

Posted

7. ...picking an apparently innocuous scab and nearly bleeding to death.

I hate when that happens :slapface: !

Nothings wosre than...

When you're just about to fall asleep, someone turns on the light.

(My sister does this ALL THE TIME)

When you pee in a public restroom thats quite.

When DirecTV doesn't work in a heavy, heavy thunderstorm.

(Luckily, that doesn't last a long time)

Posted

When your damned motorcycle won't start. :beat:

A flat tire when it's raining. :nuke:

Slow computers (with 'high speed' connections) :computertrash:

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