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In The Realm of Silliness: Judging A Book By Its Title!


Kiwi_Zep_Fan87

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In the midst of all the heavy, controversial, direct, indirect, 'mini' political 'discussions' around here, I believe that it's time for some silliness!

After getting back home from work today, I read some silly news about a pretty well-known Indian actress who declared George Orwell's Animal Farm to be (I'm employing some paraphrasing, here): an effective guide for future generations with regard to caring for animals in a nurturing environment, such as a farm! Needless to say, that 'review' had me in splits! :hysterical:

So (for a start), I thought of a few absolutely ridiculous interpretations of some well known works of literature, based solely only upon their titles! :P 

To all you sensitive literary snobs out there, who can't take a joke and who view my thread as blasphemous, well, all I can say is this: If you don't like my silliness, then don't participate in this thread. It's that simple! If I can tolerate political banter, you can certainly tolerate my silliness.  :peace:

Right. The following are my silly interpretations of four books that are very dear to my heart: 

'Anthem' by Ayn Randis a poignant tale of patriotism, that involves having deep respect for your country's flag, constitution and national anthem!

'The Fountainhead' by Ayn Rand, is a comprehensive narrative that describes a young plumber's woes, as his efforts to repair a fountain prove fruitless!

'To Kill A Mockingbird' by Harper Lee, follows the adventures of a birdwatcher's journey to America, in search of a newly discovered species of migratory birds. 

'The Da Vinci Code' by Dan Brown, is a comprehensive guide to mastering complex codes in a HTML and a C++ ecosystem!

Needless to say, I am deeply interested to see your silly contributions! ;) 

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'Don Quixote' by Miguel de Cervantes is a tale of the head of the Quixote mafia family, and all of his unsavory deals and acts.

'Moby Dick' by Herman Melville is an incredibly detailed examination of John Bonham's famed drum solo. Everything from his technique, to his speed, to a comprehensive guide to each concert in which it was performed.

'Uncle Tom's Cabin' by Harriet Beecher Stowe is a tedious, long description of a cabin owned by the crazy uncle of a family. It even examines what kind of wood was used, how it was built, etc. Not recommended.

'Steppenwolf' by Herman Hesse is a biography of the band, a full 40 years before they even existed! I think this Hesse fellow was the Nostradamus of the 20th Century, as it's very accurate!

'Tropic of Cancer' by Henry Miller is a history of the Tropic of Cancer, notably including the different species that live in it, and how it got the name Tropic of Cancer. Never knew one could produce such a long novel over such a trivial subject matter!

'1984' by George Orwell is a look back on the year of the same name. Very good year for movies (Ghostbusters, Gremlins, Karate Kid, Beverly Hills Cop, Temple of Doom, Amadeus, Once Upon a Time in America) in particular.

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Lord Of The Flies-----A hiker takes a dump in the steaming forests of New Guinea, little realizing the consequences of his actions.

Of Mice And Men-------See Catch 22 post.

The Idiot----The trials and tribulations of O.J. Simpson.

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Lord Of The Rings: A cautionary tale on how hot you like your chillies

A Tale Of Two Cities: The rise of London to the detriment of Liverpool

On The Road: The story of how a hedgehog met his end

The Time Machine: The story of a Zeppelin fan trying to get back to 25th June 1972 in Los Angeles 

 

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"Lord of the Flies"......A Manhattan street bum is elected King of the neighborhood dumpster.  His minions constantly rub their hands in praise.

 

"The Art of the Deal".....A shady Vegas blackjack dealer lets you in on the secrets to cheating casinos at the table.

 

"Dr. Strangelove (How I learned to stop beating off and love the ladies)"......'self'-explanatory.

 

"Gone With the Wind"........Basic tutorial on how to pass gas discreetly,  Including a chapter on methods used to blame others.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Loving the silliness! :P

Will respond to each post, when I have more time.

I've got a few more:

Gone With The Wind - What Not To Do When A Tornado Is About To Crash Into Your Home

Hamlet - A Weight Watcher's Guide To Perfecting a Guilt-Free Recipe for a Typical English Breakfast 

Fifty Shades of Grey - A Senior Citizen's Guide To Applying Hair Dye Without Looking Like an Artificial Twat

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'Dr. No' by Doctor Gloria Ironbox-----Dr. Ironbox's feminist guide to the suppression of female sexuality, hatred of men and the rise and worship of the vibrator.

'For Whom The Bell Tolls'-------Spanish fighters trapped in an old church are slowly driven mad by the incessant ringing of the church bells as they kill each other off one by one, leaving only one survivor......The deaf bell ringer.

'The Catcher In The Rye'---Story of a major league ballplayer who succumbs to drink while at the top of his career.

 

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