slave to zep Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 Just to make one more point about this--I totally understand that it's the very anonymity that makes people feel free to express their feelings. But it's actually very sad that they come here to do it, when there are many other forums out there dedicated to people who have similar problems, who might be able to offer advice from the point of view of someone who's walked in those shoes. (It was a good point that you can't know whether a thread is of interest to you or not until you've actually read it, too. I don't have a problem with any thread either, STZ, for the most part--but I do have a problem with some of the people reading these threads, and it's alarming how vulnerable to those people some of these posters make themselves, if you catch my drift.) hi aqua yeah it is sad that the poster came here to talk about it, a bit strange. i do understand you and longdistance on that point. but they DID, and i think it would be even sadder for us to ignore them. i don't post very often, but this one caught my interest, and i wanted to try and help. like tangerine said, you do sometimes wonder about there authenticity, but like her, i don't really care if they turn out to be taking us all for a ride, i am willing to take that chance. after all, what have i lost ? and i may just help someone in need. i was helped when i was a newbie and i am still friends with them today. they helped me a lot. ( hi guys ). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JimmyPageZoSo56 Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 What bugs me is when you get mixed reactions from people you like and not getting a straight answer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~tangerine~ Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 hi aqua yeah it is sad that the poster came here to talk about it, a bit strange. i do understand you and longdistance on that point. but they DID, and i think it would be even sadder for us to ignore them. i don't post very often, but this one caught my interest, and i wanted to try and help. like tangerine said, you do sometimes wonder about there authenticity, but like her, i don't really care if they turn out to be taking us all for a ride, i am willing to take that chance. after all, what have i lost ? and i may just help someone in need. i was helped when i was a newbie and i am still friends with them today. they helped me a lot. ( hi guys ). You say it better than i could i totally agree with you. I can understand some feeling like this isn't the place. But for some reason, that person felt it was for them. So if they are fake, didn't hurt us any to try to help. It's not like they took our money in a scam. If we helped them in any way, that is a wonderful thing. Have a nice day slave to zep, i'm sure you need your sleep! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mary Hartman Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 I understand why they do it. People have to talk. I've done it on the Mental Illness thread. But that was an established thread for everyone to contribute on. It's for discussion - not sympathy. Some of these threads are just sprung from nowhere, and you're reading something that is incredibly personal. I just don't think it's appropriate. It's all well and good saying, 'if you don't like it, don't read it', but sometimes you do read threads. Sometimes you don't know what they're about until you read them. I guess I'm at a loss as to why you'd come here of all places to unburden yourself. Like I said, it's a public forum, and people can say as they please, but is it the right place? No, I don't think so. I just think you have to be careful when people make these kind of threads, especially when they don't acknowledge the very specific reason that they ought to be here - i.e. the band. I hope you don't think bad of me because of this. It's just my pet peeve. I'm trying to understand the Peeve. You being mentally ill is the Peeve? Or too many topics for you to handle? Or people talking in an open forum in a democratic manner? I do have to run. And I hope you get your mental illness sorted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~tangerine~ Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 What bugs me is when you get mixed reactions from people you like and not getting a straight answer. That's called someone who doesn't communicate well or doesn't want to communicate well with you. I have been through that and lost someone i loved because of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dzldoc Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 That's called someone who doesn't communicate well or doesn't want to communicate well with you. I have been through that and lost someone i loved because of it. Good morning sugar! My don't you look just fine this day! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~tangerine~ Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 Good morning sugar! My don't you look just fine this day! Hey, great to see you! I was up early for a change, have the entire day to myself, and the weather is perfect! What else could i ask for, ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
longdistancewinner Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 I'm trying to understand the Peeve. You being mentally ill is the Peeve? Or too many topics for you to handle? Or people talking in an open forum in a democratic manner? I do have to run. And I hope you get your mental illness sorted. Perhaps you ought to read the rest of what I've posted? And you don't have to understand my peeve - it's my peeve, not yours. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patrycja Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 You say it better than i could i totally agree with you. I can understand some feeling like this isn't the place. But for some reason, that person felt it was for them. So if they are fake, didn't hurt us any to try to help. It's not like they took our money in a scam. If we helped them in any way, that is a wonderful thing. Have a nice day slave to zep, i'm sure you need your sleep! Agree with STZ and Tangerine here. You never know about intentions even with people you know, let alone with those you don't. Our online roles are just that, part of the many we have, like the roles of student, parent, friend, etc. People reveal or conceal to whatever point of comfort or conceit, we can't control that. Most people here it seems are genuine, and those that are not eventually reveal themselves (like in life -- there are always signs, even in retrospect). But who knows whether the 'new' people who come here to spill haven't been lurking for a while and decided to share? There's no harm in showing support online, it makes people feel better - and not just the receivers. So if someone's having a go, it doesn't take anything away from showing kindness. It's just you learn that next time, this person is full of it and you respond differently. But until you know either way, a little kindness goes a long way. Just my two cents. It's when people stubbornly hang on to their limiting, even harmfully self-defeating positions even after 180 pages of solid gold, well-intended advice that's really annoying. There's only so long you can walk with self-absorbed pity because the world isn't exactly like you want it before you go your own way. Life's too short Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mary Hartman Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 Perhaps you ought to read the rest of what I've posted? And you don't have to understand my peeve - it's my peeve, not yours. Then don't post it in a forum unless you want someone to comment on it. As far as your position being a prerequisite for me stating my opinion on your "insights" or "peeves" or if you truly feel you can get proper medical attention from a Led Zeppelin board? Well I'm sure not stepping on your doctors orders to get myself in trouble. I don't know ANYONE who feels medical advice can be given on a "Led Zeppelin Forum." Most Physicians feel web sites as a whole are tacky. Well, good ones anyhow. So next time you break a leg, log on and get some real good advice. Long Distance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
longdistancewinner Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 Then don't post it in a forum unless you want someone to comment on it. As far as your position being a prerequisite for me stating my opinion on your "insights" or "peeves" or if you truly feel you can get proper medical attention from a Led Zeppelin board? Well I'm sure not stepping on your doctors orders to get myself in trouble. I don't know ANYONE who feels medical advice can be given on a "Led Zeppelin Forum." Most Physicians feel web sites as a whole are tacky. Well, good ones anyhow. So next time you break a leg, log on and get some real good advice. Long Distance. Whatever you say, sir. I was going to reply to you, but you made zero sense whatsoever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mary Hartman Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 Whatever you say, sir. I was going to reply to you, but you made zero sense whatsoever. Then I suggest you get a dictionary and a proper Psychiatrist, Madame. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
longdistancewinner Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 Then I suggest you get a dictionary and a proper Psychiatrist, Madame. Edited: Not even worth my time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mary Hartman Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 Edited: Not even worth my time. Take my advice. If you need medical help call an ambulance. And I think most will agree with me. Be good to your health and it will pay you back many times. I'm off jogging. Toodles>>> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spats Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 Just piss the fuck off Spats, you sound like a 2 year old who needs his diaper changed. GROW UP! I does not have anything to do with growing up. It's just my opinion. And i am not going to sugarcoat them to get on a woman's good side. Not worth the effort. The attitude that a guy should be putting women first is the attitude that needs to change. I can see putting kids first but not women. They are grown ups too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spats Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 Do me a favor. This weekend, go someplace public that is family-friendly. The food court at the mall, for example. Wear sunglasses, so noone can tell you are looking at them, and then sit back and observe. Watch people with children, and make sure to pay attention to who is doing the parenting. You will notice that Mothers and Fathers DO NOT do equal amount of work when it comes to their children. If one person works harder than the other, why should they both get equal reward? That'd be like having two employees, and one does twice the amount of work as the other, but yet you give them both the same pay raise. Doesn't make sense. I have seen families out and seen guys doing plenty. I can't count how many times i have seen the dude being the one pushing the babies around for instance. Amongst other things. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~tangerine~ Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 I have seen families out and seen guys doing plenty. I can't count how many times i have seen the dude being the one pushing the babies around for instance. Amongst other things. Maybe men in Canada take a more active role in parenting than here in the U.S.A. Not to put down American dads, but there are too many who could care less about their children in this country. I know too many women who had children with men like that, included the author of this post, lol. I worked with a few travel nurses about 7 years ago who were from Canada. They said that as a maternity benefit, either parent is given one year off with pay for a newborn baby. I thought that was so wonderful, and our country needs to step up a little bit with this one. So maybe, there is some truth in what you have observed. Still, what Bonnie is saying, and me, too, is that women are generally the ones to do most of the childrearing.... feeding, diapers, lullabyes, losing sleep, taking care of their needs as they grow! That's not to mention all the other household chores that still need to be done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aquamarine Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 hi aqua yeah it is sad that the poster came here to talk about it, a bit strange. i do understand you and longdistance on that point. but they DID, and i think it would be even sadder for us to ignore them. i don't post very often, but this one caught my interest, and i wanted to try and help. like tangerine said, you do sometimes wonder about there authenticity, but like her, i don't really care if they turn out to be taking us all for a ride, i am willing to take that chance. after all, what have i lost ? and i may just help someone in need. i was helped when i was a newbie and i am still friends with them today. they helped me a lot. ( hi guys ). Hi slave to zep, It's not the authenticity of the poster I was talking about, though, it's the fact that if the person IS authentic, they're in a very vulnerable place in their life, which makes them extra-vulnerable to some of the dodgy characters on this board, who while they're a tiny minority, are nevertheless genuine trouble. Hence the fact the poster would have been better off and safer in a different kind of forum (allowing for the fact that none can be 100% safe). It seemed very odd to me that this would have been the forum recommended. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ally Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 Hi slave to zep, It's not the authenticity of the poster I was talking about, though, it's the fact that if the person IS authentic, they're in a very vulnerable place in their life, which makes them extra-vulnerable to some of the dodgy characters on this board, who while they're a tiny minority, are nevertheless genuine trouble. Hence the fact the poster would have been better off and safer in a different kind of forum (allowing for the fact that none can be 100% safe). It seemed very odd to me that this would have been the forum recommended. There certainly is cause for some concern Aqua and I believe your concerns are worthy of discussion. It's one thing when established members call out for help or just have other friends help them to sort things out. Quite another when it's somebody who has just chosen to post here for no other reason. Having said that, it's very tough not to respond to the call. For most of us, we genuinely wish to be at the very least, responsible. The danger is as you say though, this place is not 100% fool proof. I'm actually glad this subject has come up because there is a fine line in these situations that needs to be handled with care. The fact that we are discussing it show's concern for the subject matter at hand. Sometimes our best laid plans and intentions don't alway's work. Definately food for thought Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slave to zep Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 Hi slave to zep, It's not the authenticity of the poster I was talking about, though, it's the fact that if the person IS authentic, they're in a very vulnerable place in their life, which makes them extra-vulnerable to some of the dodgy characters on this board, who while they're a tiny minority, are nevertheless genuine trouble. Hence the fact the poster would have been better off and safer in a different kind of forum (allowing for the fact that none can be 100% safe). It seemed very odd to me that this would have been the forum recommended. i see where you are coming from, and totally agree. such a shame that there are people like that here, but i guess they are on all boards, so even if the original poster did go to a different site, she may still encounter these types. she hasn't posted again yet ............... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mary Hartman Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 There certainly is cause for some concern Aqua and I believe your concerns are worthy of discussion. It's one thing when established members call out for help or just have other friends help them to sort things out. Quite another when it's somebody who has just chosen to post here for no other reason. Having said that, it's very tough not to respond to the call. For most of us, we genuinely wish to be at the very least, responsible. The danger is as you say though, this place is not 100% fool proof. I'm actually glad this subject has come up because there is a fine line in these situations that needs to be handled with care. The fact that we are discussing it show's concern for the subject matter at hand. Sometimes our best laid plans and intentions don't alway's work. Definately food for thought Perhaps I don't understand the importance of this person who has "threatened with suicide," or whatever they have done. But. IMHO an online board is not a place to hack about medical advice. Especially mental health. If you don't believe what I'm telling you to be the truth have a long look at MySpace... Then go speak with people with the AMA or the APA... See how much medical advice you will get from these individuals if they are doctors to begin with. The only proof you have that they are "Medical Professionals?" Is the same proof you have that I'm "Mary Hartman." As far as stepping on doctors orders? If you work in these fields you will know it's just not done. This is why very careful records and medical histories are kept and kept in triplicate. I do however hope this person does find the help they are looking for. There are very dodgy people online. However I do think I can back my ass with a congress woman who will tell you I've volunteered to go to The Supreme Court with evidence to help take down some of them. I will do it again too if I'm asked to. This was way back in Ohio many years ago on a scam with people getting like 1500 to design a very professional web site for you right? Guess what you got? An place to ftp and a little desk icon. Don't be scammed. The American Psychological Association Web can however be found here. Yes I was a psych major. http://www.apa.org/ I doubt if it looks like a thread called 'Mental Health Thread." I do give good advice at times and it's free. If it's done with love it will come out right. Well hopefully! Yeah I love you crazy Ledheads, just keep it quiet eh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aquamarine Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 i see where you are coming from, and totally agree. such a shame that there are people like that here, but i guess they are on all boards, so even if the original poster did go to a different site, she may still encounter these types. she hasn't posted again yet ............... It's very true that they're on all or most boards, but some boards do seem to attract them more than others. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~tangerine~ Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 Hi slave to zep, It's not the authenticity of the poster I was talking about, though, it's the fact that if the person IS authentic, they're in a very vulnerable place in their life, which makes them extra-vulnerable to some of the dodgy characters on this board, who while they're a tiny minority, are nevertheless genuine trouble. Hence the fact the poster would have been better off and safer in a different kind of forum (allowing for the fact that none can be 100% safe). It seemed very odd to me that this would have been the forum recommended. The person did say she is 47, so at least it wasn't a young person asking for help. If they had identified themself as being 16, i would have hesitated more to say anything except for them to talk to someone in their life they trust. now as slave to zep said, that person hasn't responded back to their thread. I guess our advice sucked Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~Bonnie~ Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 I have seen families out and seen guys doing plenty. I can't count how many times i have seen the dude being the one pushing the babies around for instance. Amongst other things. I don't know what it's like at your planet, but here in America, pretty much all of the families I know go a little something like this: Mom's day: Mom gets up, wakes up the kids, gets breakfast ready, makes sure kids are dressed, fed, and ready to go to school/daycare, takes kids to school/daycare on way to work, works all day, picks kids up from school/daycare on way home, stops at grocery store to pick up groceries. Once they're home, she cooks dinner, picks up the house, does a load of laundry, helps kids with homework, makes sure they've had their baths, and puts them to bed. Dad's day: Wakes up, eats food wife has prepared, goes to work, works all day, comes home, eats food wife has prepared, sits on couch, drinks beer and belches while watching sports. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slave to zep Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 The person did say she is 47, so at least it wasn't a young person asking for help. If they had identified themself as being 16, i would have hesitated more to say anything except for them to talk to someone in their life they trust. now as slave to zep said, that person hasn't responded back to their thread. I guess our advice sucked good thing we gave it for free ! perhaps she is off putting our advice into action ............ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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