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Pet Peeves

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Honestly, you should have seen the shock and horror on some of my students' faces when I taught Jim Crow, hate groups, and segregation and integration as a prelude to To Kill A Mockingbird.

I had some straight out vile pictures of lynchings, mobs, etc. that were meant to shock and appall the kids. I hung up a TON of pictures, including Jim Crow signs and I told them, "this isn't meant to be pretty or funny. It's not meant to be something you're comfortable with. I want you to think about how this makes you feel uncomfortable and what you can do with this to make our world a better place."

I had one girl who is like 1/8 black or something, (as I recall the information correctly...I know for a fact that she's from the Dominican Republic), and she was absolutely appalled--she didn't know how black people were treated in America as recently as the 60's.

Yes, we've come a long way, but we still need to march on with the progression on this matter.

In the school district I work for, Jim Crow laws come after The Holocaust. The kids have all seen graphic Holocaust pictures, so I figured they should also see graphic Jim Crow law-related pictures to show them it doesn't just happen in Nazi Germany.

Edited by manderlyh

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That's good - I'm glad to hear you're really bringing it home as to what a serious issue this is, because like you said, I think a lot of hatred comes from people who are just plain ignorant about the people they're putting down - they don't know anyone from that group; they just know what other people say about them.

I'm glad the kids were shocked, though, and while it's weird that they didn't know about our past racial problems, I'm glad they don't see that as part of their world. That's definitely the time to talk to them about it, though; young enough so that they have all the information they need about the past in order to make good decisions in the future. That's so cool that you get to be a part of that process!

----

Edit: On a totally different note, one of I have got a horsey's posts just reminded me of something that ticks me off - the History Channel! Where's the history, I ask?!?! Why don't they just rename it the Conspiracy Theory Channel and have done with it? If I wanted to watch a zillion shows about aliens, ghosts, monsters, or the Book of Revelations, I certainly wouldn't tune into the History Channel to watch them! And like horsey said, when they do show actual history, it's all World War II! Now don't get me wrong, I think WWII is really interesting, but you'd think it was the only war anybody ever had! Gimme back the rest of the world's history, please!

Edited by Footsteps of Dawn

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Nathan, my friend, I have also walked down the familiar and ugly paths of facing prejudice and racism

As an eighteen year old woman coming from a Muslim family that can trace back to Pakistan [india and Bangladesh too, but those countries don't have a bad reputation] and even to Persian and Afghan roots, in the eve of the devastating 9-11, things have been very difficult.

I also had very direct hits. In fact, even this year, with tensions escalating in Pakistan, someone said directly in class, "We should just nuke Pakistan." I also heard, "we should nuke India" several times [india is a strong ally of America, so that is just stupid to hear]. I'm glad the teacher didn't stand for it, otherwise that would have been worse.

I can't tell you how many times I heard that I should "go back home and just die or something" or "my terrorist daddy should just take me back home" when I was living in the Midwest [in a strictly homogeneous community as you can tell]

But there is beauty in life as people have said here. That stereotype of "Middle Eastern" [since that's what people presume I am] is not me: I, in fact, love it here in America and I don't hate infidels and I want to live peacefully and, just normally, not like a fanatic.

Adding to that, The "Middle-Eastern" label is nothing I'm ashamed of. In fact, it's very beautiful: the music, the food, the art, the fashion, the facets that nobody gets to see in CNN or anything. That, along with my family, is what keeps me going strong.

And every culture is beautiful, including yours, Nathan. So, just remember that most of these bigots truly are uneducated people with more problems than the people they attack.

ON A SIDE NOTE:

I also want to be happy as well, sans depression, and it's working pretty well so far. It's just I'm very worried about some of my relatives in Pakistan [in the wake of the insurgency and everything]. They seem to be doing fine, but I still worry a bit before drifting off to sleep. They're also such innocent bystanders and I really care about them. I keep telling myself that no nuclear attack is gonna happen there or anywhere because of these tensions and that it is just the words of some uneducated warhawk classmates, but the worrisome mind is.....annoying to deal with.

Edited by DeepBlackZeppelin

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I'm sure that's hard to deal with, DBZ. In Boise, the majority of our immigrants are from the Middle East or from Africa. I worked as a substitute in the ELL Language Academy that the Boise School District has at least a few times a week this past semester. This school is one where brand-new immigrants to the country are able to send their kids so they have an intensive all-English immersion and they also receive what would be "remedial" language skills classes if American kids were taking them. The kids go to the school for up to two years, or until they're fluent enough to get along in regular, mainstream schools with just an ELL study hall.

Having said that, at this school, more than eighty languages are spoken, and there are kids from so many countries, it's incredible. Yes, even in Boise, Idaho, which I previously called "white bread." I've worked with kids who have great prejudices against one another's countries, and it's interesting to see how they can insult their friends' countries of origin and still be able to be friends.

Because Boise's so homogeneous, I was a little nervous to work with kids who were from the Middle East, and who were from Asia, who were from Africa, but every single ethnic "grouping," (I'm saying "grouping" becuase I'm generalizing their ethnic groups as I probably would if I didn't know anything about any of these kids, and I'm basing on how they appear, not what I know) had its different set of things I was nervous about.

Even teaching summer school, when my classroom was about 90% Hispanic kids that seemed to look like pretty hardened kids, I was a bit nervous because they looked a little harder than I thought I could handle, but then I realized something very, very important.

THESE ARE KIDS! No matter how "hard" some of them may seem, they're freakin' kids! They are in the middle of growing up, most of them have been submerged in this totally different culture, they're not this or this or this, (I'm talking about stereotypes); no, the Iraqi kids don't hate America, they (most of them) are more than happy to live here! No, the boys from Afghanistan (probably) aren't thinking I'm a harlot just because I'm not in Muslim dress, they know our culture is different here!

One thing that people need to remember about others: we're all people. Something people need to remember about kids: THEY'RE KIDS!

Some of these immigrant children have seen really terrible things in their lives: I know for a fact that several of them have seen their immediate family members killed by some of these terrorist groups in some of these other parts of the world, they've seen their friends and family tortured by evil people, etc. Some of these kids may have a chip on their shoulder, but it's becuase SOMEONE DID SOMETHING REALLY TERRIBLE to them or someone they love, so they've had to become "harder" to survive.

Honestly, I wish I could get a job at that school now because I think these kids would teach me to be a better person. I am fascinated by some of these children's stories, and I wish I was able to hear more.

So Rabia, I'm sorry that these people treat you the way that they do. It's annoying, I'm sure, and I am sure that living in the area you live in compounds the BS you have to take. I am not sure what you can do to ease those types of things. I'm glad your teachers don't take that crap from anyone--I for one, jump all over my kids when they say things like, "that's gay," or "don't be a Jew," because they say these kinds of things without really realizing what they're saying. They say them knowing the basic meaning, but they don't realize how hurtful those types of things are.

You were born in the U.S., weren't you? Not that it makes a difference, but just remember when someone says something ridiculously stupid to you that they're the idiots and the losers, not you. (I hope this helps a bit...)

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Thank you very much, mandy, for your very thoughtful and insightful post.

I know you're not a bigot at all, and I can see that you were just getting used to a new experience.

But you saw and came to realize what so many people fail to see, we are all humans and that is not going to change depending on culture or ethnicity

And humans will have elements of good and bad, some more severe than others, despite ethnicity or culture

I'm very glad that you had the open-mindedness to see that important message and that you felt as if you learned something significant from it.

And about the idiots, well I've been dealing with it for a while, so I'll be alright. But I wish they could just see that every culture has so much beauty and splendor to it, and that despite our differences, we share so much in common [most of us want to find love and acceptance from others albeit how much we try to hide it and most of us want to raise our children in a loving and caring manner so that these values live on]

[it's also amazing to hear about what they had to endure, very tough situations I can't imagine]

I'm doing quite alright, besides that ;) , I just pray for the safety of my relatives in Pakistan.

[oh and by the way, I was born in Pakistan, but you're right, it doesn't really matter]

Edited by DeepBlackZeppelin

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No, it doesn't matter. You are here now, and that's where you plan on staying, right? So why should it matter?

I also think of you and many others on this board when I read about the turmoil going on in that part of the world. I hope everyone in your family and all your family's friends are safe.

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Yes I do plan on staying here, for a long time.

And thank you very much for your condolences. It means a lot to me. But that is the nature of the beast [human society in general]

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I'm from a Jewish family. Most of them settled in London, and, as a consequence, are buried there. Because of the antisemitism and bigotry that Jews have suffered, I can no longer visit their graves because the cemetery has been desecrated so many times. You either have to book, or it's not open to the public at all. I can't even get a new headstone for my grandfather because they closed the cemetery. They set fires in the cemetery. Who does that? And, why? Because it's a Jewish resting place? It's heartbreaking. So, not only did they suffer persecutioin in their homeland (Warsaw), but even after death, they still couldn't escape it. :(

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Thank you very much, mandy, for your very thoughtful and insightful post.

I know you're not a bigot at all, and I can see that you were just getting used to a new experience.

But you saw and came to realize what so many people fail to see, we are all humans and that is not going to change depending on culture or ethnicity

And humans will have elements of good and bad, some more severe than others, despite ethnicity or culture

I'm very glad that you had the open-mindedness to see that important message and that you felt as if you learned something significant from it.

And about the idiots, well I've been dealing with it for a while, so I'll be alright. But I wish they could just see that every culture has so much beauty and splendor to it, and that despite our differences, we share so much in common [most of us want to find love and acceptance from others albeit how much we try to hide it and most of us want to raise our children in a loving and caring manner so that these values live on]

[it's also amazing to hear about what they had to endure, very tough situations I can't imagine]

I'm doing quite alright, besides that ;) , I just pray for the safety of my relatives in Pakistan.

[oh and by the way, I was born in Pakistan, but you're right, it doesn't really matter]

It's good to see you here DBZ. I'm so sorry for what you have to go through - it's ignorance on people's parts. What made this country unique is the melting pot of cultures from all over the world. I embrace that all the time and find there's so much you can gain from experiencing how others live and their customs/beliefs etc. I'm sure it's also a stress to having family abroad with all the troubles going on right now. I wish things would settle down soon all over the world. It's a really tumultuous time right now.

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I'm from a Jewish family. Most of them settled in London, and, as a consequence, are buried there. Because of the antisemitism and bigotry that Jews have suffered, I can no longer visit their graves because the cemetery has been desecrated so many times. You either have to book, or it's not open to the public at all. I can't even get a new headstone for my grandfather because they closed the cemetery. They set fires in the cemetery. Who does that? And, why? Because it's a Jewish resting place? It's heartbreaking. So, not only did they suffer persecutioin in their homeland (Warsaw), but even after death, they still couldn't escape it. :(

I just don't have any words. How horrible you can't even pay respects to your family because of the violent acts happening there to the cemetery. I don't know why people feel they must behave this way. Live and let live. Differences in beliefs should be embraced, not ostracized. You don't have to agree with it but to act out in such violence and disrespect is beyond anything I can fathom. I'm really sorry for you and your family :console:

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I'm from a Jewish family. Most of them settled in London, and, as a consequence, are buried there. Because of the antisemitism and bigotry that Jews have suffered, I can no longer visit their graves because the cemetery has been desecrated so many times. You either have to book, or it's not open to the public at all. I can't even get a new headstone for my grandfather because they closed the cemetery. They set fires in the cemetery. Who does that? And, why? Because it's a Jewish resting place? It's heartbreaking. So, not only did they suffer persecutioin in their homeland (Warsaw), but even after death, they still couldn't escape it. :(

I am very sorry to hear about that, that is a terrible situation. I can't even imagine how it'd be like to feel that sorrow, knowing you can't even visit his stone. I hope your grandfather found peace and salvation in a realm far too good for this mundane world.

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It's good to see you here DBZ. I'm so sorry for what you have to go through - it's ignorance on people's parts. What made this country unique is the melting pot of cultures from all over the world. I embrace that all the time and find there's so much you can gain from experiencing how others live and their customs/beliefs etc. I'm sure it's also a stress to having family abroad with all the troubles going on right now. I wish things would settle down soon all over the world. It's a really tumultuous time right now.

Thank you very much for your input, good to see you too.

I really appreciate that there are people like you who tolerate other cultures and don't give into the mob mentality and find time to learn and to appreciate. It really means a lot.

And yes, it is very tumultuous right now, but reading how longdistancewinner also felt separated from her family lets me know that I'm not the only one who feels a tragic cleft with family members. Knowing that both of our relatives were [are] persecuted makes me not feel alone.

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I just don't have any words. How horrible you can't even pay respects to your family because of the violent acts happening there to the cemetery. I don't know why people feel they must behave this way. Live and let live. Differences in beliefs should be embraced, not ostracized. You don't have to agree with it but to act out in such violence and disrespect is beyond anything I can fathom. I'm really sorry for you and your family :console:

Thanks :) The cemetery had 386 tombstones vandalised. 386. In one night. That was in 2003. A further 30-40 were vandalised in 2008. I can't allow myself to think of how bad it is because I don't want to think of my grandfather being there. It was bad enough that his entire family were buried in another cemetery.

I am very sorry to hear about that, that is a terrible situation. I can't even imagine how it'd be like to feel that sorrow, knowing you can't even visit his stone. I hope your grandfather found peace and salvation in a realm far too good for this mundane world.

Thank you, DBZ. He came to England to escape persecution. And he still got it in death. I can only hope those who did what they did will live to regret it every day of their lives. But I know they won't. Regardless of what religion they 'picked on', they'll never understand the pain and hurt caused. That alone tells me that they're not human. Just ignorant cowards.

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Thank you very much for your input, good to see you too.

I really appreciate that there are people like you who tolerate other cultures and don't give into the mob mentality and find time to learn and to appreciate. It really means a lot.

And yes, it is very tumultuous right now, but reading how longdistancewinner also felt separated from her family lets me know that I'm not the only one who feels a tragic cleft with family members. Knowing that both of our relatives were [are] persecuted makes me not feel alone.

For all the pain, worry and fear that you will feel for your family, I can only say that you are very lucky to have them. When my family came to England, those that they left behind were almost certainly killed. I try and think that maybe we just lost contact, but you're looking at a Jewish family in wartime Warsaw. I know they're gone. My surname is very unusual; the only time I see it is in relation to the Holocaust or the Warsaw Ghetto. Now, it's just my father, my brother and myself. I feel a huge gap knowing that my family are living/buried in another city, never mind another country. It pains me to say as much, but, sadly, you are defintely not alone. :(

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For all the pain, worry and fear that you will feel for your family, I can only say that you are very lucky to have them. When my family came to England, those that they left behind were almost certainly killed. I try and think that maybe we just lost contact, but you're looking at a Jewish family in wartime Warsaw. I know they're gone. My surname is very unusual; the only time I see it is in relation to the Holocaust or the Warsaw Ghetto. Now, it's just my father, my brother and myself. I feel a huge gap knowing that my family are living/buried in another city, never mind another country. It pains me to say as much, but, sadly, you are defintely not alone. :(

I can't even imagine what it is like for you and I am truly sorry your family had to go through that. I was fortunate that my family escaped before the war but the sadness I feel towards those who didn't is unexplainable.

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I can't even imagine what it is like for you and I am truly sorry your family had to go through that. I was fortunate that my family escaped before the war but the sadness I feel towards those who didn't is unexplainable.

Thank you, nine. The really sad part is that my family left before the war as well. One half left for London and the other half chose to stay in Poland. They, obviously, weren't to know what was to happen. And even when they did settle here, they had to suffer through the Blitz. So, I guess, when it rained for them, it really poured.

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Rabia! I've missed you so! I have not forgotten you, and am happy to see you back around here! Love and hugs! :beer:

LongDistance, I've seen enough of tattoos on forearms of loved ones. Believe me, I know sweetheart. My great aunt was smuggled out of Poland in a haywagon, with soldiers stabbing at the hay with bayonettes.

Edited by Evster2012

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My pet peeve of the moment is family members saying they'll help you, then when it comes down to the point where you need the help they said woud be there.. it's nowhere to be seen. They like to pretend they care and want to help, but then run off to ignore the problems after that.

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My pet peeve of the moment is family members saying they'll help you, then when it comes down to the point where you need the help they said woud be there.. it's nowhere to be seen. They like to pretend they care and want to help, but then run off to ignore the problems after that.

Sorry to hear that LSG. My mom has remained my best friend for 43 years, despite all my juvenile attempts to alienate her. 84 years old and always there for her son. I reckon if I cried MURDER she'd even put aside her shopping! :lol:

Hang in there "Girl", they care. They just don't know it yet. ;)

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Rabia! I've missed you so! I have not forgotten you, and am happy to see you back around here! Love and hugs! :beer:

LongDistance, I've seen enough of tattoos on forearms of loved ones. Believe me, I know sweetheart. My great aunt was smuggled out of Poland in a haywagon, with soldiers stabbing at the hay with bayonettes.

I have too :(

After all of this,my pet-peeves seem so........petty.

Not at all mate. If it bothers you, share - there's no scale of that here ;)

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Rabia! I've missed you so! I have not forgotten you, and am happy to see you back around here! Love and hugs! :beer:

LongDistance, I've seen enough of tattoos on forearms of loved ones. Believe me, I know sweetheart. My great aunt was smuggled out of Poland in a haywagon, with soldiers stabbing at the hay with bayonettes.

I can't imagine how terrifying it must've been for your great aunt. But, you know, I do appreciate these kind of stories. I feel immense pride for anyone who had to do what they had to do against the Nazis and I feel that with just that one story - one ancedote - it's one lesson that we can learn from and be better because of. I hope to dear god that we never experience anything like it again.

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Well, night 2 was awesome. He and I talked a lot about what I love and what my future goal is. He told me that he doesn't think I need major sessions, maybe an hour twice a month. He said I need to stop repressing old memories and start dealing with them. Which I guess is a great idea.

Meanwhile, I have an outlet. I love music, and I love writing it. I used to hate political and social commentary/critique, and satire in songs, but now it's just about all I write. So I that's what I'll keep doing. Basically... I'm apparently no where near as bad as I thought... what was hitting me was repressed stuff that was had no more room to be repressed anywhere, and so just came back up.

Nathan, my irreverence has no bounds!

Canter Newman had no idea! Ev at 16. 1982.

EvHasIssues002.jpg

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