slave to zep Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 That's a tough one. I take it that your EX is not helping the situation. That's not cool. Is he capable of handling things without your support or is he not agreeable to some kind of compromise ? hes not agreeable to any compromises. im going to have to go to court Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ally Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 hes not agreeable to any compromises. im going to have to go to court You need to stick up for your well being and if that's the only way of doing so then I say. go for it. Your doing all the work and getting shafted for your efforts. Don't let your feelings for him stand in your way. You deserve better Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slave to zep Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 You need to stick up for your well being and if that's the only way of doing so then I say. go for it. Your doing all the work and getting shafted for your efforts. Don't let your feelings for him stand in your way. You deserve better thanks, it will take a while to get to court. they have this new system where you have to try mediation first ) which is a good thing ) but i KNOW we wont reach an agreement, a judge will have to decide. and then things will be even colder between us. im so unhappy. just now im thinking back to when we were together and happy. ive loved him since i was 13, we met at school. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ally Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 thanks, it will take a while to get to court. they have this new system where you have to try mediation first ) which is a good thing ) but i KNOW we wont reach an agreement, a judge will have to decide. and then things will be even colder between us. im so unhappy. just now im thinking back to when we were together and happy. ive loved him since i was 13, we met at school. Is there any hope of you two getting back together ? If so then I don't need to say much in the way of advice. If not, then at some point you will have to look out for yourself and the child. Having a broken heart is an awful experience but you have more than just yourself to think about. I know that it sounds a bit cold of me to say this but, he sounds like someone who is taking advantage of your emotions while he sits on easy street. He is the childs father, maybe it's time he acted like one Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slave to zep Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 Is there any hope of you two getting back together ? If so then I don't need to say much in the way of advice. If not, then at some point you will have to look out for yourself and the child. Having a broken heart is an awful experience but you have more than just yourself to think about. I know that it sounds a bit cold of me to say this but, he sounds like someone who is taking advantage of your emotions while he sits on easy street. He is the childs father, maybe it's time he acted like one i cant see us back together any time soon. maybe after my 19 yo leaves home ( dont know when that will be ) we MAY try. my 19 yo is not his son and they dont get on. he once asked me to send 19 yo back to his dad so we could get it together, but it wasnt an option, for a few reasons. i have resigned myself to the fact that ill always be poor, thats a given, unless i win the lottery or such. but its a combo of the lack of money AND noeone to squeeze me, you know? like when you are in love or at least happy with a partner, you can get over most things. i just want to scream " FUCK THIS!!!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ally Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 i cant see us back together any time soon. maybe after my 19 yo leaves home ( dont know when that will be ) we MAY try. my 19 yo is not his son and they dont get on. he once asked me to send 19 yo back to his dad so we could get it together, but it wasnt an option, for a few reasons. i have resigned myself to the fact that ill always be poor, thats a given, unless i win the lottery or such. but its a combo of the lack of money AND noeone to squeeze me, you know? like when you are in love or at least happy with a partner, you can get over most things. i just want to scream " FUCK THIS!!!" I hear you. We all want love in our life. I wish I could be of more help to you with that but, that's such an individual matter that only you can make the decission on. What I will say though is, maybe your older kids could be of assistance with say, babysitting so as you could maybe go out and have some free time for yourself. Maybe get together with friends. It's not all about clubs and bars etc. And FWIW, there is nothing wrong with being on this forum and enjoying it. Plenty of really good people here and most of them care about the other members and how they're lives are going. One thing for sure about this place.....Your never alone Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slave to zep Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 I hear you. We all want love in our life. I wish I could be of more help to you with that but, that's such an individual matter that only you can make the decission on. What I will say though is, maybe your older kids could be of assistance with say, babysitting so as you could maybe go out and have some free time for yourself. Maybe get together with friends. It's not all about clubs and bars etc. And FWIW, there is nothing wrong with being on this forum and enjoying it. Plenty of really good people here and most of them care about the other members and how they're lives are going. One thing for sure about this place.....Your never alone yes my older two do babysit when i need them to. i went to the aussir meetup with reggie and amazonic last week. it was so much fun, i really let myself feel happy and got into the music of zep. i think i need to get out in the sunshine and do some walking. its all about motivation, of which i have none, again, cos i just feel like " whats it for ?" zep and this forum has become my life. i said elsewhere on this forum that there are indeed worse things to be addicted to. however not having any friends or work mates that are into them makes it hard. why cant everyone on this forum live in australia??????? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ally Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 yes my older two do babysit when i need them to. i went to the aussir meetup with reggie and amazonic last week. it was so much fun, i really let myself feel happy and got into the music of zep. i think i need to get out in the sunshine and do some walking. its all about motivation, of which i have none, again, cos i just feel like " whats it for ?" zep and this forum has become my life. i said elsewhere on this forum that there are indeed worse things to be addicted to. however not having any friends or work mates that are into them makes it hard. why cant everyone on this forum live in australia??????? Carefull what you wish for kid. We may invade your place and forget to leave. Two ee's for everyone and we'll make you buy . Talk later zzzzz time Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slave to zep Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 Carefull what you wish for kid. We may invade your place and forget to leave. Two ee's for everyone and we'll make you buy . Talk later zzzzz time id love it! thanks for talking Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rosiegirl Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 id love it! thanks for talking Hi slave to zep, Hope you are feeling a little better. It really helps to get it all out when you are feeling down, and I am sure you can see that there are some people here who are sincere,and want to listen to you. So just remember, any time you are feeling alone and depressed, we are hear for you. what always makes me feel better is getting in my car, popping in Zep cd, turning it way up, and taking a little drive. When Robert sings IN THE LIGHT I know I am never alone. Really all their songs make me feel good, but this one in particular, really touches my soul,when I feel really bad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slave to zep Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 Hi slave to zep, Hope you are feeling a little better. It really helps to get it all out when you are feeling down, and I am sure you can see that there are some people here who are sincere,and want to listen to you. So just remember, any time you are feeling alone and depressed, we are hear for you. what always makes me feel better is getting in my car, popping in Zep cd, turning it way up, and taking a little drive. When Robert sings IN THE LIGHT I know I am never alone. Really all their songs make me feel good, but this one in particular, really touches my soul,when I feel really bad. thanks rosie! yes, i know there are lots of lovely people on here. we are zep fans, so of course we are the best class of people, lol. thats why i thought i would "talk" on here. and yes zeps music is uplifting, i dont listen to any other music ( drives the kids nuts ), i turn it on and close my eyes and pray to jimmy. dont laugh, im not a weirdo, i really do. whether or not he will ever hear me.............. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evster2012 Posted May 30, 2008 Author Share Posted May 30, 2008 I received a pm from Slave to Zep and with her permission, I'd like to share my reply. I saw your posts. I'm so sorry you're going through this. Sucks big time. I'm somewhat better. The fact that I'm still unable to find work does give me the shakes from time to time, but I've managed to find a few things to brighten my days. I've started playing with my band again, and while it's so easy to fall into the pattern of saying "Screw it", when we actually plug in, it takes me back to myself, so to speak. "There it is". "There's what I love so much". It's always in the back of mind, though. I've got X in the bank, and it's going fast. Whatever am I going to do? Will we be homeless in a couple of months? What will become of all my prized possessions? That weighs on me. Sometimes a lot. It would be so much easier if I could get work. I need the distraction. Time flies so fast when there's nothing going on, and your security has a shelf life. Just gotta keep plugging along and hope for that opportunity to come along so you can get back in the game. At first I regretted starting this thread, as certain people saw fit to use it as fodder to feed their personal disagreements with me. But to see how it's grown, and how so many people have found it to be a place they could talk openly really makes the pebbles thrown by the little snarkers whose own issues can't be shared as they might be construed as a parole violation are of little to no consequence. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slave to zep Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 I received a pm from Slave to Zep and with her permission, I'd like to share my reply. At first I regretted starting this thread, as certain people saw fit to use it as fodder to feed their personal disagreements with me. But to see how it's grown, and how so many people have found it to be a place they could talk openly really makes the pebbles thrown by the little snarkers whose own issues can't be shared as they might be construed as a parole violation are of little to no consequence. im glad you started this thread, ev. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maureen Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 It's the session now, I have to take so many exams...but I'm used to it, my marks are usually "ex". Nevertheless I feel very nervous all the time now. But the fact is our professor of English is an angel! Really! I have hardly met such amazing people in my life. To my utter regret, initially she was to teach us only one semester, which is over by now. Mayby she'll stay with us the next year, but we don't know yet. So it really matters to me, I need her to stay with us, as well as she wants to keep on teaching us. That's about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimmy's A Legend Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 Hay i only found your thread today and i read it, i am glad you started it, it takes confedence to say something like that. I am suffering from depresion aswell, have inherited from my mum which has past down from my family, and it gets in the way of my life, sleepless nights,feeling like the whole world is against you and all, not to metion family life isn't going well, if you can call it family, anyway lets not go into that, and anyway like i said at the begining saying what your feeling is a step forward. Glad you started this,now i don't feel like a freak not that depressed people are freaks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimmie ray Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 I wasn't going to interrupt any of this, and don't want undo anything that's been given hope to - but I don't feel it's right to rationalize your situation by saying it's your mom's fault or some family trait. If you really believe that, wouldn't you want to reverse the trend you're on, to show mom (even if she's not alive) it isn't her fault and give hope to the future of your family? I know I'm way out of an area of my knowledge, but something like this would have me trying extra hard to rectify. Good luck, anyway! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evster2012 Posted May 30, 2008 Author Share Posted May 30, 2008 I wasn't going to interrupt any of this, and don't want undo anything that's been given hope to - but I don't feel it's right to rationalize your situation by saying it's your mom's fault or some family trait. If you really believe that, wouldn't you want to reverse the trend you're on, to show mom (even if she's not alive) it isn't her fault and give hope to the future of your family? I know I'm way out of an area of my knowledge, but something like this would have me trying extra hard to rectify. Good luck, anyway! I couldn't agree more! I have no history of depression in my family. I lost my job and things got shitty and it bummed me out. That's neither chemical or genetic. The best thing is to get back to what you can do, and not lose yourself. I've got band practice today. And if the weather permits, I'll jump in the pool. Stagnation is the enemy. Keep moving! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimmie ray Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 I can't believe I was even close to being on track with this subject. My wife has had bouts of depression, and it was the hardest of all conditions to find the right thing to do or say about. Some things are easier said than done, unfortunately. Keep on truckin', is all I can offer... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evster2012 Posted May 30, 2008 Author Share Posted May 30, 2008 Keep on truckin', is all I can offer... Well now keep on truckin' mama, truckin' my blues away Keep on truckin' mama, truckin' my blues away Here you come mama big as sin, tell what you been doin' by the shape you're in So keep on truckin' mama, truckin' my blues away If you been doin' what I think you been doin' baby, can't do that 'round here You been doin' what I think you been doin' baby, can't do that 'round here Here you come mam big as hell, tell what you been doin' by way you smell So keep on truckin' mama, truckin' my blues away What's that smell like fish pretty baby, I really would like to know Tell me What's that smell like fish oh mama, I really would like to know That ain't puddin' baby ain't no pie, it's the stuff that I got you by So keep on truckin' mama, truckin' my blues away Now yes you gotta leave this mornin', get your yas yas outta my door Now yes you gotta leave this mornin', get your yas yas outta my door Ashes to ashes mama, dust to dust, what-cha gonna do when that damn thing rusts So keep on truckin' mama, truckin' my blues away or: Truckin got my chips cashed in. keep truckin, like the do-dah man Together, more or less in line, just keep truckin on. Arrows of neon and flashing marquees out on main street. Chicago, new york, detroit and its all on the same street. Your typical city involved in a typical daydream Hang it up and see what tomorrow brings. Dallas, got a soft machine; houston, too close to new orleans; New yorks got the ways and means; but just wont let you be, oh no. Most of the cast that you meet on the streets speak of true love, Most of the time theyre sittin and cryin at home. One of these days they know they better get goin Out of the door and down on the streets all alone. Truckin, like the do-dah man. once told me youve got to play your hand Sometimes your cards aint worth a dime, if you dont layem down, Sometimes the lights all shinin on me; Other times I can barely see. Lately it occurs to me what a long, strange trip its been. What in the world ever became of sweet jane? She lost her sparkle, you know she isnt the same Livin on reds, vitamin c, and cocaine, All a friend can say is aint it a shame? Truckin, up to buffalo. been thinkin, you got to mellow slow Takes time, you pick a place to go, and just keep truckin on. Sittin and starin out of the hotel window. Got a tip theyre gonna kick the door in again Id like to get some sleep before I travel, But if you got a warrant, I guess youre gonna come in. Busted, down on bourbon street, set up, like a bowlin pin. Knocked down, it gets to wearin thin. they just wont let you be, oh no. Youre sick of hangin around and youd like to travel; Get tired of travelin and you want to settle down. I guess they cant revoke your soul for tryin, Get out of the door and light out and look all around. Sometimes the lights all shinin on me; Other times I can barely see. Lately it occurs to me what a long, strange trip its been. Truckin, Im a goin home. whoa whoa baby, back where I belong, Back home, sit down and patch my bones, and get back truckin on. Hey now get back truckin home. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ally Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 I can't believe I was even close to being on track with this subject. My wife has had bouts of depression, and it was the hardest of all conditions to find the right thing to do or say about. Some things are easier said than done, unfortunately. Keep on truckin', is all I can offer... It is, very tough to live with someone who is suffering. You seem to be very understanding and that is a credit to you. Your absolutely right about having to keep moving. It can be difficult for others to understand that we do our partners and ourselves no good if we fall down as well Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimmie ray Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 Shit, yeah!!! Don't get me in trouble, dancing on the job, man! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evster2012 Posted May 30, 2008 Author Share Posted May 30, 2008 Shit, yeah!!! Don't get me in trouble, dancing on the job, man! I'll dance for ya bro! But if they bust into I Need a Miracle, I may fall over in my seat! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rosiegirl Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 I wasn't going to interrupt any of this, and don't want undo anything that's been given hope to - but I don't feel it's right to rationalize your situation by saying it's your mom's fault or some family trait. If you really believe that, wouldn't you want to reverse the trend you're on, to show mom (even if she's not alive) it isn't her fault and give hope to the future of your family? I know I'm way out of an area of my knowledge, but something like this would have me trying extra hard to rectify. Good luck, anyway! He did not say it was his mom's fault, as if she did it on purpouse. What he said was he inherited depression from his mom and other family members.And he is right, their is a certain gene that can be passed along to other family members. That does'nt mean becouse one has it that everyone will, it just makes certian people more suseptible to it. It really is not a trend he can just reverse, but once people realize it is not their fault, they can certainly get help and try to cope with it. And also if they pass it on to their children in the future, they can assure them that they are not alone in this, and they are not some sort of 'freak' as was mentioned before, in his post. This truely is an illness, just as if a person had diabetis, or some other illness. I am sure people are starting to understand this now about depression, which is great, so nobody has to feel bad about themselves any more, feeling isolated is one of the worst things a person with depression can do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimmie ray Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 I did try to excuse my clumsiness walking into this thread, I already knew my thought processes and wording might do more harm than good. Words like "blame" and "trend" may not be the most suitable for comfort. But I never alluded to anyone being a "freak". I won't disturb this dicussion any longer, and if my roughness or questionable attempts at humor were inappropriate elsewhere, I apologize also. I'm not in forums much, and might get carried away with not knowing the nuances of conversation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LedZepChick Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 yes my older two do babysit when i need them to. i went to the aussir meetup with reggie and amazonic last week. it was so much fun, i really let myself feel happy and got into the music of zep. i think i need to get out in the sunshine and do some walking. its all about motivation, of which i have none, again, cos i just feel like " whats it for ?" zep and this forum has become my life. i said elsewhere on this forum that there are indeed worse things to be addicted to. however not having any friends or work mates that are into them makes it hard. why cant everyone on this forum live in australia??????? Getting out in the sun and walking will definitely make you feel better and improve your mood. Try to do some form of exercise on a daily basis. Exercising is what helped me the most. Listen to music that makes you happy...That will get you motivated. We've all had our moments in the darkness, and it just takes some time for it to pass, but it will. Keep believing in yourself!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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