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The Spats Thread


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Well, since any topic that Spats posts in, inevitably becomes a Spats-fest, why don't we limit Spats' relationship woes, and our bashing of him, to this thread?

It's a little science experiment, come inside won't you? Drink deep the mystery that is "Spats". Try as you might, you'll never be able to unlock his insane bizarre psyche.

Think of it as a counselor's office, and we're all sitting around in white lab coats with clipboards, and Spats is on our proverbial psychiatrist's couch, telling us his thoughts on women and dating.

So Spats, how's the hunt going? Any call-backs on your recent venture into number-giving?

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A compilation of good quotes from Spats:

That's just how i feel about it. There is just something about the act that is degrading to me. It looks degrading as well. Well, i have explained why it's distasteful to me. I just lost all interest in the ex girlfriend who did it to me. And it was just disturbing how much she was enjoying it. And she looked bad doing it. The whole thing. I couldn't really enjoy it because i was distracted by all of that. Not to mention i didn't want to kiss her again. The relationship ended shortly after that.

In my opinion putting your mouth where one goes to the bathroom is dirty. No way around it.

Well my looks are not getting me in the door nevermind a long stay.

Yes but at least those are my own germs. Not hers. Kissing is different. I love that but not downtown. To me it's degrading and i just don't know the best way to explain it. The act just looks degrading.

But i don't makeout just after eating dinner unless we have brushed our teeth. I don't want her left over cheeseburger in my mouth. or first thing in the morning because nobody's breath smells great first thing in the morning.

And i know all about women. I have dated enough of them. The reason i i am single is because the pickings in Toronto are pretty bad. I have standards. I am not gonna date unattractive women that approach me.

Some people think personality can overcome average looks but i have found it can't. And on the dating scene today looks are an important part of the deal. First impressions are EVERYTHING.

I used to be into just blondes but i have loosened up since then. Last couple girlfriends had dark hair. Never hooked up with a red head.

A girl can have the greatest body in the world but if their face isn't that pretty i would have to pass.

Yes i prefer her to make the move. It shows she is a openminded, modern women. And it's a turn on and i don't have to worry about being rejected which have have had my share of. But i should try and accept it if she wants to hook up for sex soon. Even though i don't understand why they would want me that fast. But a one night stand is definatley out. Being easy is not sexy.

I have self esteem issues because i don't think i am that good looking or that special? That's just how i feel and have not understood why past girlfriends found my looks attractive, etc.

I just don't know what they meant by getting my act together. I am doing the best i can with what i have going for me. I am limited.

What is so frustrating about what i am saying?

And as i said i wouldn't trust any woman that wanted to have sex with me that quickly.

I just got a microwave oven. Damn it's handy. And i have been popping the popcorn like crazy with it when watching my recent dvd rentals. In two minutes the popcorn is ready!!

I didnt say anything wrong. I am not mysogynistic.

If it's only the man that does it then it must. It just gives off a "the woman is extra special" type feel to it. I am not traditional at all. Maybe if women started getting down on one knee i would see it differently. My last girlfriend broke up with me because i wouldn't be a traditional boyfriend.

I realize that a lot of women love the guy to get down on one knee and buy an expensive engagement and wedding ring (that she doesn't have to make the payments on). But any woman i would be with would be waiting a long time for that. If she wanted to get married she would have to do the asking. I don't get on my knees for anyone. You are putting the woman on a higher level than you and lowering yourself. The guy by doing that is saying she is better than him or more special than him. Putting her on a pedestal whihc is not a healthy thing to do. You are supposed to be equals.

If you notice, all these things cater to the woman. Not a level playing field at all. The guy is getting the short end of the stick in almost everything.

Opening doors, giving flowers yadda, yadda, i guess is alright if the guy really wants to do it. And if he is getting lots in return. But he should not have to. And if the woman expects it she just isn't cool. She thinks she's a princess.

A shakeup is needed because i am in a slump. Maybe doing the exact opposite is the way to go. I don't know.

I am very interested in women. I am out at the clubs all the time.

I know plenty. I just don't go by women's dating rules. I do what i want.

These views are too old fashioned. What is wrong with a week? If a woman is impatient with how long it's taking for him to call then she should call him.

I have waited that long to contact a woman. Don't worry about it.

If you like to go downtown fine. But i am careful about what i put in my mouth.

What do i have to do to prove i am real?

I don't think any of my likes and dislikes and stuff i don't like to do needs the attenton of a therapist.

No Bondage. No food, that would be gross. I can't stand it when people talk with their mouth full nevermind sex and food. Never done role playing. Sounds silly.

I can't pretend to be Mr.Romance or Mr.Hotstuff.

If my buddy had not interfered she would not think i am a "gutless idiot". If he had left well enough alone she would have just thought i wasn't interested. Or better yet she would have regreted not coming out and asking for the number. He has nerve being mad at me for not hooking up with her when he is to blame. Now he says i made him look bad by not calling her. he says he feels like he wants to apologize to her.

But she was trying to bait me into asking for her number or giving mine to her. But she would not ask. If that's not game playing then i don't know what it is.

Did she get what she wanted? No. And it was her own fault she didn't get what she wanted. She blew it. Not me.

My likes and dislikes are nothing weird.

But not wanting people to laugh at you or see you rejected is not from lack of confidence.

I think i will still be rejected now for the very reason i was rejected back then. That's not lack of confidence. That's just being realistic. As i said, my looks haven't improved since i was a teen and looks still matter even after highschool is over.

I got into an argument with an ex because i wouldn't tell her my middle name.

Single and looking. Sadly pickings are slim in Toronto. The hotties are mostly already taken. All that leaves are Plain Janes. Those are the only ones approaching me right now. So things aren't going good. I have no interest in getting married. But i would love to hook up with a Pretty, cool, modern woman who is not into drama or games.

Yeah, but in marriage there are are whole new set of ugly problems. At least when you are single you have the option to get the hell out. You are not trapped. You are free and have the option to do anything you want. You don't have that when you have signed the marriage contract. And isn't the word "contract" one of the most negative words you have ever seen?

The best thing to do is put yourself out there and let them approach you. The last thing you need right now is to get rejected. That will make you feel even worse. The coolest girls do the approaching. You don't want a girl with a romance novel mindest. The best ones are the ones that go after what they want. Modern women. Not women who think they are princess's and should wait until their prince charming arrives.

Well i will only worry about that if she's a hottie. If she isn't it won't bother me. I'll be better off.

I have been hooking up with women since my teens. I have plenty of experience. Not to mention all the women i have met and got to know. Which is tons.

To be honest i don't think i am the problem. Being clingy or possessive, etc, or the behavior i don't like is not healthy behavior. If i am guilty of anything it's not wanting to settle. I would likely have a girlfriend right now if i settled. I wouldn't have a girl with the qualities i want but i would have one probably.

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