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Mattmc1973

The Spats Thread

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Pretty much! :D Plus, my idea of love doesn't have anything to do with "settling down," so...different strokes for different folks.

That's right! I forgot about that.

At the moment I have to admit... I rather like your idea of love. But then I'm a 20-year-old guy, so that makes sense... :blink::DB)

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Wait... what?

How old are you?

Don't you want to settle down, get married, have children, and all that? If you get married, unless you're stupid and get married to someone who you're gonna divorce, you should be together "until death do you part," and possibily beyond death.

It's called love.

Besides... I was with my last girlfriend for two years... and we haven't officially broken up, either... she's just attending Oxford in England... and I'm in the USA, so... yeah...

See... you've learned that men are stupid and just aren't gonna get it... :D

Never had any interest in getting married and having kids and likely never will. It's not for everybody and a couple can be happy without getting married. How long have Kurt Russell and Goldie hawn been together? Marriage is not the answer to the problems everywhere.

Edited by spats

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That's right! I forgot about that.

At the moment I have to admit... I rather like your idea of love. But then I'm a 20-year-old guy, so that makes sense... :blink::DB)

Well, the only person I have that much energy for is my daughter. I don't like co-habitating with a man. I like paying my own bills, doing my own laundry, and going wherever the hell I want, when I want. I hate waiting around for someone or someone waiting around for me.

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Never had any interest in getting married and having kids and likely never will. It's not for everybody and a couple can be happy without getting married. How long have Kurt Russell and Godies hawn been together? Marriage is not the answer to the problems everywhere.

Actually, you're right... but your example works against your previus statement. You said you wouldn't want to be with a girl for that long, but the example you use is a couple that have been together for years, marriage or no.

What about my previous post to you? The long one? Any reponse?

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Well, the only person I have that much energy for is my daughter. I don't like co-habitating with a man. I like paying my own bills, doing my own laundry, and going wherever the hell I want, when I want. I hate waiting around for someone or someone waiting around for me.

Amen. There need to be more women like you. :D

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Actually, you're right... but your example works against your previus statement. You said you wouldn't want to be with a girl for that long, but the example you use is a couple that have been together for years, marriage or no.

What about my previous post to you? The long one? Any reponse?

I wouldn't want to be with a woman for that long. I was just using them as an example of couples who are in love and had never needed marriage to make them feel secure,etc. And of course they can get out of that relationship anytime they want which is good.

Edited by spats

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Amen. There need to be more women like you. :D

It feels weird to be unusual in that regard. I didn't know I was. I know more than a few single women who feel pretty much the same. Thanks, though! :D

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I wouldn't want to be with a woman for that long. I was just using them as an example of couples who are in love and had never needed marriage to make them feel secure,etc. And of course they can get out of that relationship anytime they want which is good.

If you're thinking about getting OUT, you shouldn't get IN in the first place.

Always looking for the easy out, eh? You're consistent anyway. :lol:

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QUOTE (Mattmc1973 @ Mar 17 2008, 01:50 PM)

Spats' expected reply..."but I wasn't the one who wanted the number, SHE was the one hinting at it. I thought she was OK, but was a bit of a plain Jane, and it never occurred to me to ask her out. She was the one who was interested, so why aren't you getting on her about not asking?"

But i was not pining for her number. I never thought about the idea of getting her number at all before she was hinting at it because she was not my ideal physical type. She was the one wanting my number. I would have gone out with her if she had come out and said something. But it was not a goal of mine to get it. Before she came over to say goodbye i thought she was cool but didn't think i would ever bump intto her again. It wasn't like i was thinking "Damn, i have to get her number!!".

Bullseye, I came pretty close, eh? B)

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I don't know if i would want to be with the same person for that long. :blink:

Whether you want to be with them a short time or a long time, they like to hint at things. That is just the way things are. They love feeling appreciated. Take it from someone who has learned this the hard way.

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You're right. I got them confused. Sorry 'bout that... :D

Admittedly, he should have told you what he was doing BEFORE he did it.

However...

Women are not the same as men, spats. No woman on this planet is going to come right out and say it. I can't tell you why. That's just the way it is. It's the same thing as when you ask her if she wants to go out. You ask her where she wants to go. She says it doesn't matter, but the truth is, it does. She has a very specific idea of where she wants to go. But, you see, women make the same-but-opposite mistake you seem to be making. Women can't accept that men are just simple-stupid. We can't read their minds. We can't look at her and know what's she's thinking. If she says to us "I don't care where we go, but I'm craving soup, salad, and bread-sticks," we aren't gonna know that she actually wants to go to the Olive Garden. But she expects us to know that, because she thinks we should, even though we won't, because we simply aren't that intuitive.

Also, you need to understand that women are much more complicated then we are (and that's a good thing, girls... promise). They hint because one thing that will impress them is that you KNOW what they're hinting at. Show wants to give you her phone number. So what if she's hinting at it? Obviously you knew what she wanted. Go for it!

I think your friend was in the wrong for not talking to you and telling you beforehand, but I think you are in the wrong because you, in fact, caused the whole situation. And you did. You can tell me 'til you're blue in the face you didn't. But you did. Try and review the facts from the eyes of one of us who's trying to tell you that you're wrong. Maybe you'll see that you did, in fact, cause the entire situation.

Look... do you want a girlfriend or not?

Fact is, if you want a girlfriend, then the first date is about impressing her. Period. End of subject. If you don't think so, then the rest of your life is going to be a series of failed relationships, failed dates, and many, many hurt and angry women. And as you know, "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned."

Look... we're not saying you need to start enjoying oral. Just realize that if you want a woman, you have to be willing to make the FIRST DATE (and JUST the first date) about her.

What are you getting out of it? Well, if you do well, it's not the possibility of a second date. It's not even a definite second date. It's a girlfriend. It's someone who will make you happy and make you feel good. The gift of just making one, two, or three hours out of your day about her is a happiness one only experiences when they're in love. So you get a LOT out of it. And, if the date goes well (which, if you just try, chances are it will), you'll still be having fun. You don't have to be her slave. Just be chivalrous. Why is that too much to ask for?

Oh, and deal with the hinting. Learn it, and learn it well. That is a woman's language. You will NEVER find a woman who will just come out and say what they want. Never. All women hint. It's their way of trying to make us as complicated and sophisticated as they are. You are shooting for a point impossible to reach if you look for a woman that blunt with a man. It's impossible to find, and you may as well give up, now. I'm just starting to learn how to interpret it, myself. That hinting thing plagued me for years, but I put up with it, and have about 50% success rate at guessing what she means. So now I know when she says "I don't care where we go, but I'm craving soup, salad, and bread-sticks," I know it means she wants to go to Olive Garden. You just have to learn to deal with it instead of rejecting it. Because every single living woman on this planet hints.

Unless you want to go out with a girl under the age of 10, in which case, you need to get some serious help...

(I know this was not directed at me, but...)

As I said before, your buddy was wrong for not telling you. However... she was in the right. As far as she's concerned, you're the one who needs to grow up. And from your story, she's absolutely right. You HAVE to change for the woman, or you will NEVER have a woman. Unfortunately, you're simply going to have to make a choice. Stick to your beliefs and never have a relationship, or accept the hinting and find yourself happy with someone you love.

There women that come right out and say it. I have dated them. They are not the majority but they are out there and they are the coolest women. Hinting is not cool. What you are pretty much saying is that most women like to play games. Because that is what that is.

Men are not stupid/simple. Some are but not all. I hate seeing a guy talking about his own gender like that. And women are not a lot more complicated and sophisticated than men are.

Dude, i did not cause the whole situation with the New Years girl. She started it all. I was minding my own business and she came over to me and started hinting.

We will have to disagree on the first date thing. I have have never catered to a woman on a first date and i got plenty of second dates. I am out to have a good time on the date as well.

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You're definitely simple/stupid. And a few tacos short of a combo platter.

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QUOTE (Mattmc1973 @ Mar 17 2008, 01:50 PM)

Spats' expected reply..."but I wasn't the one who wanted the number, SHE was the one hinting at it. I thought she was OK, but was a bit of a plain Jane, and it never occurred to me to ask her out. She was the one who was interested, so why aren't you getting on her about not asking?"

Bullseye, I came pretty close, eh? B)

:hysterical:

Right on the money!

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I apologize if I gave the impression that men are stupid. I don't think that. We are just different from each other, that's all. Sometimes I wonder if we're even meant to live together, but I'm biased because I enjoy being on my own. Don't wanna cause any trouble! :P

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There women that come right out and say it. I have dated them. They are not the majority but they are out there and they are the coolest women. Hinting is not cool. What you are pretty much saying is that most women like to play games. Because that is what that is.

Men are not stupid/simple. Some are but not all. I hate seeing a guy talking about his own gender like that. And women are not a lot more complicated and sophisticated than men are.

Dude, i did not cause the whole situation with the New Years girl. She started it all. I was minding my own business and she came over to me and started hinting.

We will have to disagree on the first date thing. I have have never catered to a woman on a first date and i got plenty of second dates. I am out to have a good time on the date as well.

Like how can the innocent person in the the whole situation (ME) be the one to blame and not the aggressors (her and my buddy)?? :blink::blink:

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I apologize if I gave the impression that men are stupid. I don't think that. We are just different from each other, that's all. Sometimes I wonder if we're even meant to live together, but I'm biased because I enjoy being on my own. Don't wanna cause any trouble! :P

What works for some doesn't always work for another, I admit. As long as you're truly happy that's all that matters. And stupidity is definitely not unique to one gender. :lol:

Problem I have with Spats' attitude is that NOTHING sounds feasible or reasonable to him. There's always a reason that a suggested course of action WILL fail. That's a terrible way to live. I honestly feel sorry for him.

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I apologize if I gave the impression that men are stupid. I don't think that. We are just different from each other, that's all. Sometimes I wonder if we're even meant to live together, but I'm biased because I enjoy being on my own. Don't wanna cause any trouble! :P

Yes, very different. Just check out the talk on the women's thread versus the guy thread. Apparently women spend several hours each day just deciding what shoes they want to wear or buy. :wacko::wacko: Guys only talk about sensible things. :whistling::whistling:

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I can't get this damn circus music out of my head...

As long as it's "Flying Circus", you're OK. B)

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Your buddy saw and recognized the fact you're a wimp. So he went up to the girl, said you were too shy to ask for her number (which is very very true) and got you the number. Rather than calling the woman, who you said you were interested in, you chose to "teach" her a "lesson" and not call. Thereby making you look like a bigger dick than you already are (remember the blind date you lied to and then stood up? Yeah.) and making him look like the hapless friend who was only trying to help. You could have gotten some play from this woman had you grown a set and called her, laughing off your shyness and saying "was I worth waiting for"....you know, being self-deprecating. Instead, you opted to remain as stubborn as as donkey stuck in mud (the same one who inhabits your thought bubbles) and now you have no play and no prospects.

Sucks to be you.

Edited by Electrophile

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What works for some doesn't always work for another, I admit. As long as you're truly happy that's all that matters. And stupidity is definitely not unique to one gender. :lol:

Problem I have with Spats' attitude is that NOTHING sounds feasible or reasonable to him. There's always a reason that a suggested course of action WILL fail. That's a terrible way to live. I honestly feel sorry for him.

Dude, i took the advice and handed my number out which was a bit nerve racking. So far that's been a bust.

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Because you're not handing your number out to the right women. You need to make a connection with these gals before you give them your digits. See if there's a possibility of things advancing past that moment. If not, don't bother. If you see yourself dating her, and you think she's into you (God only knows why), then give them to her.

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Because you're not handing your number out to the right women. You need to make a connection with these gals before you give them your digits. See if there's a possibility of things advancing past that moment. If not, don't bother. If you see yourself dating her, and you think she's into you (God only knows why), then give them to her.

DING! We have a winner!

Pity it all has to be explained, step by step....

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Your buddy saw and recognized the fact you're a wimp. So he went up to the girl, said you were too shy to ask for her number (which is very very true) and got you the number. Rather than calling the woman, who you said you were interested in, you chose to "teach" her a "lesson" and not call. Thereby making you look like a bigger dick than you already are (remember the blind date you lied to and then stood up? Yeah.) and making him look like the hapless friend who was only trying to help. You could have gotten some play from this woman had you grown a set and called her, laughing off your shyness and saying "was I worth waiting for"....you know, being self-deprecating. Instead, you opted to remain as stubborn as as donkey stuck in mud (the same one who inhabits your thought bubbles) and now you have no play and no prospects.

Sucks to be you.

Being a wimp had nothing to do with it, or shy.

I should have had a say in whether he was going to do that. Going behind my back and embarassing me was wrong. Will you admit that? And when she was told that (even though it was a lie) she was still expecting me to call her. :o In my opinion a cool girl would have said when she was told i was "shy" would have just got my number from him and called me.

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