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  • 2 weeks later...

OK, I haven't had cable in a while, so maybe this isn't new to everyone, but it's new to me. ---> LOL <---
Seriously, this is the most epic commercial I've seen in quite some time.

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The US military has cancelled it's multi billion dollar research and development programme into the next generation of stealth aircraft as they have discovered that simply turning off the transponder has the same effect.

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Conscious Uncoupling !!! Those perennial dullards Martin and Paltrow couldn't even calling SEPERATION. Still Chrissy boy, you can now enjoy a good steak and a bottle of red whilst your ex settles down to a nut roast and some tofu kebabs and a glass of nettle and dandelion smoothie.

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A Craigslist 'Missed Connection' we'd like to see....

Goober's Night Club last Saturday night.

Me: I was the drummer in the band picking my nose during a break.

You: You were in the front row picking your scabs.

If you see this let's pick a place to meet.

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  • 3 weeks later...

A very wealthy 86-year-old man went to his doctor for his quarterly check-up.
The doctor asked him how he was feeling, and the 86-year-old said ,'Things are great and I've never felt better.'
I now have a 20 year old bride who is pregnant with my child.'
'So what do you think about that Doc?'

The doctor considered his question for a minute and then began to tell a story.
'I have an older friend, much like you, who is an avid shooter and he never misses a season.'
'One day he was setting off to go hunting.'
'In a bit of a hurry, he accidentally picked up his walking cane instead of his gun.'

'As he neared a lake, he came across a very large male beaver sitting at the water's edge.'

'He realised he'd left his gun at home and so he couldn't shoot the magnificent creature.'
'Out of habit he raised his cane, aimed it at the animal as if it were his favourite hunting rifle, and went 'bang, bang.''
'Miraculously, two shots rang out and the beaver fell over dead.'
'Now, what do you think of that?' asked the doctor.

The 86-year-old said, 'Logic would strongly suggest that somebody else pumped a couple of rounds into that beaver.'
The doctor replied, 'My point exactly!'

Edited by Reggie29
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