sirchris Posted June 21, 2008 Author Share Posted June 21, 2008 I'm a 52 year old male. What are the chances of me forming a cutting edge rock band? I'd like to be the singer, but would settle for tambourine player. Dear Jethro, At 52 you have already exceeded the average lift expectancy of a human male by 11 years. The likelihood of you living another 6 months greatly should concern you more than the chances of having enough time to get together some kind of avant-garde electro cabaret act. My advice would be to crawl up to the caves in the mountain side overlooking your town and await the great sleep. Lots of Love, Auntie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sirchris Posted June 21, 2008 Author Share Posted June 21, 2008 Dear Auntie, It's hot outside, I just woke up from a nap, and my head hurts. What is your best advice for a headache? Cheers, Eternal Light Dear Eternal Light, Easy one this. Best cure for a headache?... simple...Throw yourself off a cross channel ferry. The adrenalin released coupled with the panic that will undoubtedly set in will take your mind off that troublesome headache! Lots of love, Auntie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~Bonnie~ Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Dear Auntie, What is the best way to get someone to take your advice? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sirchris Posted June 21, 2008 Author Share Posted June 21, 2008 I'm not going to lie, they are slim. However, I say if you want something you have to go for it! So you should give it your best shot and hope for the best. OI!! anymore of that young lady and Auntie will have you hurt. I know people you know... BAD people. No one dispences advice in this clinic except Auntie or one of Aunties sub-contractors/sponsors. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------- This post was bought to you by LUCOZADE. The fresh taste of copper! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sirchris Posted June 21, 2008 Author Share Posted June 21, 2008 Dear Auntie, What is the best way to get someone to take your advice? Dear Bonnie, I always find gunpoint works well. Failing that you could always try blackmail or legal writs. Lots of love, Auntie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virginia Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Well then how is anything going to get going if no one puts themselves on the line??? And if she is the one flirting then why shouldn't she be the one to put herself on the line? I just want them to be honest. Women can't really give the excuse that they are afraid to be rejected because 9 times out of 10 a pretty girl will not get rejected. Guys don't usually turn down pretty girls. There is not really a rejection risk for women at all. Besides, the point was that flirting does not mean the person is really interested and it can cause mixed signals. Or maybe women just aren't good at flirting. You would think if one is a good flirter then you would know for sure if the person is interested. Wouldn't ya think? I have had experiences where a girl flirted with me and it turned out she wasn't interested and then i had a girl who wasn't obviously flirting and my buddies said the girl was definatley interested in me. WTF????? Maybe something made them reconsider? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lzfan715 Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 OI!! anymore of that young lady and Auntie will have you hurt. I know people you know... BAD people. No one dispences advice in this clinic except Auntie or one of Aunties sub-contractors/sponsors. I made a comment in a PUBLIC forum. And I'm just curious what people are you talking about? Are you sure that I actually spend time talking to these "bad" people? I don't talk to people who are "bad". Unless, of course, you are one of those people, in which case, yes, I am talking to a bad person. P.S. How do you know if I'm even a girl? It isn't set on my profile. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suz Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 I made a comment in a PUBLIC forum. And I'm just curious what people are you talking about? Are you sure that I actually spend time talking to these "bad" people? I don't talk to people who are "bad". Unless, of course, you are one of those people, in which case, yes, I am talking to a bad person. P.S. How do you know if I'm even a girl? It isn't set on my profile. He's just messin' with ya. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sirchris Posted June 21, 2008 Author Share Posted June 21, 2008 P.S. How do you know if I'm even a girl? It isn't set on my profile. I just assumed you were Janis Joplin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eternal light Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Dear Eternal Light, Easy one this. Best cure for a headache?... simple...Throw yourself off a cross channel ferry. The adrenalin released coupled with the panic that will undoubtedly set in will take your mind off that troublesome headache! Lots of love, Auntie. Thanks Auntie, maybe I'll give it a try if aspirin doesn't work. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lzfan715 Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 She died on October 4, 1970, so obviously not. What's your next reason? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sirchris Posted June 21, 2008 Author Share Posted June 21, 2008 She died on October 4, 1970, so obviously not. What's your next reason? Oh good lord. Please stop this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lzfan715 Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Stop what? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seminole Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 This is a Disconnection Notice. Go Figure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sirchris Posted June 21, 2008 Author Share Posted June 21, 2008 I feel we've started off on the wrong foot here. Here please accept 20 euros worth of e-vouchers courtesy of Aunties Clinic and Woolworths. They are non-redeemable and valid until 3 minutes ago. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~Bonnie~ Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 I made a comment in a PUBLIC forum. And I'm just curious what people are you talking about? Are you sure that I actually spend time talking to these "bad" people? I don't talk to people who are "bad". Unless, of course, you are one of those people, in which case, yes, I am talking to a bad person. P.S. How do you know if I'm even a girl? It isn't set on my profile. He's saying, "I know bad people, you know?" Not "I know bad people that you know." It's a joke. Unless you believe all of the advice is actually serious??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BAAM Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Dear Auntie, I eyed my best friends privates in the shower and now all I do is think about his penis everytime I see him. What should I do? Tell him I saw Gods gift to women and laugh it off or let it torment my soul until the end of my days? Not even kiding Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hickory Man Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 I made a comment in a PUBLIC forum. And I'm just curious what people are you talking about? Are you sure that I actually spend time talking to these "bad" people? I don't talk to people who are "bad". Unless, of course, you are one of those people, in which case, yes, I am talking to a bad person. P.S. How do you know if I'm even a girl? It isn't set on my profile. I'll vouch for Auntie....she's been around for a good long time. Bad coupons notwithstanding..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ledbaby Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 I'll vouch for Auntie....she's been around for a good long time. Bad coupons notwithstanding..... There went all credibility right down the tubes... Pussy pence, lasagne, coffee and turkeys only please Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hickory Man Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 There went all credibility right down the tubes... Pussy pence, lasagne, coffee and turkeys only please Wow! That actually made sense! You're gaining on it scooter! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arntzen Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Dear Auntie, I eyed my best friends privates in the shower and now all I do is think about his penis everytime I see him. What should I do? Tell him I saw Gods gift to women and laugh it off or let it torment my soul until the end of my days? Not even kiding Perhaps give into the urge, and come out of the closet. Your obvious malcontent with the situation means you have a deep-rooted guilt about what happened. If I was sirchris, that is what I would suggest. But I ain't. So just keep on rolling... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ledbaby Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Dear Auntie, I eyed my best friends privates in the shower and now all I do is think about his penis everytime I see him. What should I do? Tell him I saw Gods gift to women and laugh it off or let it torment my soul until the end of my days? Not even kiding That sig is funny. Thank you for the chuckle. Cheers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BAAM Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 ^Cheers to you kind sir, I'm glad. And other person, I'll probably tell him at some point, but I'm partially convinced it was purposely done. He had the statue Davids stature for Christsake! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ledbaby Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 ^ NP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lake of Shadows Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Yay!!! Sir Chris is back... AND Ask Auntie has been revived!!! I made a comment in a PUBLIC forum. And I'm just curious what people are you talking about? Are you sure that I actually spend time talking to these "bad" people? I don't talk to people who are "bad". Unless, of course, you are one of those people, in which case, yes, I am talking to a bad person. P.S. How do you know if I'm even a girl? It isn't set on my profile. I can vouch for Auntie... his advice is priceless (usually). But yes, Auntie is bad, delightfully bad (usually). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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