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Spats' Loveblahblahblah Thread


Lake of Shadows

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It's simple. Sluts are promiscious. Being forward does not make anyone a slut. Sleeping around does.

I find it tremendously sad that anyone would use that word to describe another woman. It's just demeaning. And coming from a woman, it sounds even worse. I use a lot of words to describe people whose behavior I don't like, but even I won't use that word and my language is saltier than the Dead Sea.

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I find it tremendously sad that anyone would use that word to describe another woman. It's just demeaning. And coming from a woman, it sounds even worse. I use a lot of words to describe people whose behavior I don't like, but even I won't use that word and my language is saltier than the Dead Sea.

What are you talking about? I didn't start the conversation and the word "slut" has been mentioned on the past 2 pages. I am simply clarifying, for the sake of showing that women who are "forward" and make the first move are not sluts. Women who "sleep around" to say it nicely, are. That is the definition of the word. For the record, i am not one of those...but i have heard girls being called that word since i was in Junior High School in the late 70's.

Edit: i see Spats used the word first, and while he got blasted for it, i still don't have a problem using it (although it's not part of my everyday vocabulary). The fact is, many women (and imo it should be used equally for men) are deserving of that term.

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What are you talking about? I didn't start the conversation and the word "slut" has been mentioned on the past 2 pages. I am simply clarifying, for the sake of showing that women who are "forward" and make the first move are not sluts. Women who "sleep around" to say it nicely, are. That is the definition of the word. For the record, i am not one of those...but i have heard girls being called that word since i was in Junior High School in the late 70's.

Edit: i see Spats used the word first, and while he got blasted for it, i still don't have a problem using it (although it's not part of my everyday vocabulary). The fact is, many women (and imo it should be used equally for men) are deserving of that term.

Did I say you started the conversation? I was responding to you using the word. It shouldn't be used, it's demeaning. If Suzy Q want to sleep with 30 guys and she uses protection and doesn't get infected with anything, who the hell is anyone to judge her? If she opens herself up to criticism by being stupid about it, that's another issue altogether.

I get tired of people thinking it's perfectly acceptable to insult people based on their sexual practices. It may not be the lifestyle I choose to live, but that doesn't mean I need to degrade someone who does practice it.

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Did I say you started the conversation? I was responding to you using the word. It shouldn't be used, it's demeaning. If Suzy Q want to sleep with 30 guys and she uses protection and doesn't get infected with anything, who the hell is anyone to judge her? If she opens herself up to criticism by being stupid about it, that's another issue altogether.

I get tired of people thinking it's perfectly acceptable to insult people based on their sexual practices. It may not be the lifestyle I choose to live, but that doesn't mean I need to degrade someone who does practice it.

My opinion of what you just said differs from yours greatly. I do find "promisciuity" to be distasteful. It really depends on the extent of the behavior. In general, because i don't care to be descriptive about this, if someone "sleeps around", i find that to be poor behavior. I will add, that many do not use protection. I'm not saying that someone who has slept with a lot of people over the years is a "slut" but someone who has multiple partners at one time or multiple one night stands...that type of thing, imo, is degrading behavior (and by definition of American Heritage Dictionary).

Back to the "word", did you ever see SNL re-runs (since you were too young to watch them when they first aired, but i saw them) with Jane Curtain's character being called that word? Funny stuff...and i will still say, when i was growing up, that word was very commonly used, so maybe that's why i don't find it to be shocking. May not sound very nice, but neither is the behavior that goes along with the definition.

http://snltranscripts.jt.org/78/78eupdate.phtml

Dan Aykroyd: Hello. I'm "Weekend Update" Station Manager Dan Aykroyd. This week, the Shah of Iran declared martial law, in an attempt to put a stop to the violent writing which has paralyzed his country. The Shah is the subject of tonight's "Point/Counterpoint". Jane will take the Anti-Shah Point, and I will take the Pro-Shah Counterpoint. Jane?

Jane Curtin: Dan, I know exactly what you're going to say: "Jane, you ignorant slut! The Shah is our friend, he sent us oil during the 70's re-embargo. He's a fighter against Communism." Maybe so, Dan, but what happened to the human rights you scream about every time a Saranski gets sentenced to some Soviet jail? Why is it wrong to torture a dissident and freezing Siberian Goulag, but okay to wire a leftist student's genitals in a baking Tehran dungeon? I only hope that someday someone wires your genitals, Dan. Then you'll be singing a different tune!

Dan Aykroyd: Jane, you poor, misguided scrag! Sure, the Shah's a jerk, but he's all we've got! Just look at the map. To the north, the Soviet Union; to the east and west, Afghanistan and Iraq. Both leftist radical states; and in the south, the Persian Gulf. Any idiot can see that Iran would be a prized stepping stone in an eventual Soviet takeover of the world. And when that happens, Jane, those Cossacks will be coming over here with their broom handle, and we'll see how you'll feel then! Of course, you'd probably love it, you ignorant slut!

Jane Curtin: That's the news. Good night, and have a pleasant tomorrow.

SNL Transcripts

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I see a difference in someone using the word in a manner that doesn't fit the definition and using it in a manner that does. When my friend and I talk on the phone, I don't say "Hey Marie, what's up?" I say, "Hey bitch, why haven't you called me?" She knows damn well that I am not calling her a bitch the way someone who was angry with her would say it, or the way someone who was trying to insult her would say it. The same as when she says "Please ho, I called you Tuesday".....she not really calling me a whore, or insinuating I am one.

I've seen those SNL skits a thousand times and the reason why it's funny is that Dan Aykroyd wasn't really calling Jane Curtin a slut. It was meant to comical, not hurtful. However when people here get fast and loose with the word "slut", they aren't being comical.

You can only be degraded if you allow yourself to be.

BTW, this is all just my opinion and I respect your right to feel differently.

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I see a difference in someone using the word in a manner that doesn't fit the definition and using it in a manner that does. When my friend and I talk on the phone, I don't say "Hey Marie, what's up?" I say, "Hey bitch, why haven't you called me?" She knows damn well that I am not calling her a bitch the way someone who was angry with her would say it, or the way someone who was trying to insult her would say it. The same as when she says "Please ho, I called you Tuesday".....she not really calling me a whore, or insinuating I am one.

I've seen those SNL skits a thousand times and the reason why it's funny is that Dan Aykroyd wasn't really calling Jane Curtin a slut. It was meant to comical, not hurtful. However when people here get fast and loose with the word "slut", they aren't being comical.

You can only be degraded if you allow yourself to be.

My only point in posting the SNL dialogue was to show how "familiar" that word was when i was young (since the skit was from the mid 70's when i first heard the word being used. It was used plenty in my junior high and high school, and i grew up in a nice part of town. My best friend was called a slut when she was eleven, the reason: she developed big boobs at an early age. She is in her early 40's now and has slept with maybe five men her entire life.

As for the slang talk, i don't use that with my friends, nor do i go around calling people names in my daily life.

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As for the slang talk, i don't use that with my friends, nor do i go around calling people names in my daily life.

Calling her names? I'm not calling her names. If I was calling her names, she obviously wouldn't be my friend for going on 20 years. It was something that started in high school just to piss off the nuns. That's just how we refer to each other, it's not serious and it's not hurtful. The reason being, the people saying it aren't using the words to be insulting. If we want to insult each other, trust me when I say, we'll use much better words.

Now if some stranger on the street called me a bitch, that's a whole different bag of oats. I allow my friends to say things to me I don't allow strangers to say. And the same is in reverse. If someone called Marie a "ho" and I'm anywhere nearby, there's a good chance someone will have a black eye and it won't be me or her.

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Calling her names? I'm not calling her names. If I was calling her names, she obviously wouldn't be my friend for going on 20 years. It was something that started in high school just to piss off the nuns. That's just how we refer to each other, it's not serious and it's not hurtful. The reason being, the people saying it aren't using the words to be insulting. If we want to insult each other, trust me when I say, we'll use much better words.

Now if some stranger on the street called me a bitch, that's a whole different bag of oats. I allow my friends to say things to me I don't allow strangers to say. And the same is in reverse. If someone called Marie a "ho" and I'm anywhere nearby, there's a good chance someone will have a black eye and it won't be me or her.

I am stating that i don't go around calling people names in my daily life, ie "sluts", or "jerks" whatever, at least not to their faces. I am not referring to the way you converse with your friend. I know people use "slang" like that, and i hear it at work all the time, in a supposidly professional environment. But i don't have a "dirty" mouth for the most part, and i don't want to talk about the word slut anymore, lol.

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A dirty mouth is so much fun, though.

When i was your age i had a much dirtier mouth, but it's not a good thing when you are raising a child. It's embarrasing when at age two your daughter is screaming (from the back seat of the car) go idiot! to the car in front...i wonder where she heard that? I started to learn my lesson real fast. :)

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When i was your age i had a much dirtier mouth, but it's not a good thing when you are raising a child. It's embarrasing when at age two your daughter is screaming (from the back seat of the car) go idiot! to the car in front...i wonder where she heard that? I started to learn my lesson real fast. :)

Well yeah, obviously there's a time and a place for certain words and phrases.

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I would say 90% is farely accurate. None of my female friends make the first move, most of the women here have said they don't make the first move. Most of the people here think it's the man's job to make the first move. I think wherever you go you will find that the majority of the time the guys make the first move.

I would say you are full of shit.

None of my female friends make the first move - Obviously, your female friends greatly differ from my female friends.

most of the women here have said they don't make the first move - really? who? :huh: Are we reading the same thread? The way you interpret things really astonishes me. Your communication filters are more inpenetrable than plate. No wonder you keep such deranged attitude, you poor thing.

Most of the people here think it's the man's job to make the first move. - Wrong! Most of the people here think it's your job, since this discussion is about you. Do you know that saying about Muhammad and the mountain?

I think wherever you go you will find that the majority of the time the guys make the first move. - Yeah, because they simply enjoy doing that.

That slut label put on women who make the first move is kept alive by other women. Guys are not labeling them that. I think most guys love it when women do that. Sure there are some alpha males or cavemen type guys that think it's wrong for a woman to do that but i don't know a guy that does not love it when women do it. It's women that knock their own gender for doing that. Some women on here have said that women that do the approaching are easy. Back in high school that was the attitude too. Other girls would not think highly of girls who did that. It's a really messed up attitude to have but it's true.

WRONG again. Some women (actually, I think it was one particular poster, not "some women") here have said that women who care only about looks and waste their life hunting other shallow men on dating scenes are easy.

As for the rest of this paragrapf, let me repeat what I've already said: You are SOOOOO full of shit.

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Naw!, this was shot in New Orleans. Just figured you might be closer to Montreal.

Both french cultured cities. B)

How do you define successful? Do you mean laid? Can you guess which one I had? B)

You need to get over this intimidation factor. Just be yourself man!No strike that!

Just be a Man!...man! :rolleyes:

I should have known better than to think it was. <_<

What's with the "be a man" comments that people are making? What does that mean exactly? Doesn't that play into stereotypes. I don't think some women here would appreciate it if someone said to them "would you just behave like a woman".

I can't help the intimidation factor. Just the thought of approaching pretty women it enters my mind..."why would they find me hot looking? there are better looking guys than me around here". I can't control that coming to my mind.

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As a matter of fact;yes she did.

We stayed near the bar;shared beers and got to know each other.

...at the end of the evening,we exchanged numbers-yes;she asked me first,and she called me two days later.

As I said previously;we've been together ever since. B)

You are a lucky guy. Congrats. There are not a lot of women who would do that.

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I would say you are full of shit.

None of my female friends make the first move - Obviously, your female friends greatly differ from my female friends.

most of the women here have said they don't make the first move - really? who? :huh: Are we reading the same thread? The way you interpret things really astonishes me. Your communication filters are more inpenetrable than plate. No wonder you keep such deranged attitude, you poor thing.

Most of the people here think it's the man's job to make the first move. - Wrong! Most of the people here think it's your job, since this discussion is about you. Do you know that saying about Muhammad and the mountain?

I think wherever you go you will find that the majority of the time the guys make the first move. - Yeah, because they simply enjoy doing that.

WRONG again. Some women (actually, I think it was one particular poster, not "some women") here have said that women who care only about looks and waste their life hunting other shallow men on dating scenes are easy.

As for the rest of this paragrapf, let me repeat what I've already said: You are SOOOOO full of shit.

There are plenty of women here who have said many times they think it should be the man that asks for the number and asks the women out. I have chatted with them about it when they have said that I should be the one doing it.

I don't think a lot of men approach women because they love doing it. I think it's because they feel they have no choice because the women are not going to do it.

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I should have known better than to think it was. <_<

What's with the "be a man" comments that people are making? What does that mean exactly? Doesn't that play into stereotypes. I don't think some women here would appreciate it if someone said to them "would you just behave like a woman".

I can't help the intimidation factor. Just the thought of approaching pretty women it enters my mind..."why would they find me hot looking? there are better looking guys than me around here". I can't control that coming to my mind.

People want you to step up and BE A MAN because you are complaining about a problem-which is, no dates-in your life that YOU are in control of. A real man would know that you can't expect any problem to fix itself, you have to take action. If the women of Toronto were coming in here, complaining about how they wish this guy Spats would talk to them, it would be different. THEY aren't complaining, YOU are.

And yes, women are expected to "act like a lady"...it's not really as big of an insult as you make it out to be. And most women like to be viewed as a woman anyways. Are you unhappy to be your gender? Is that why this bothers you?

It is intimidating to ANYONE to approach a stranger, not just men. Men are way more likely to judge a woman solely on looks than a woman is to do that to a guy. Most women will give a guy a chance as long as he has a nice personality, even if she thinks the guy is only slightly cute.

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I should have known better than to think it was. <_<

What's with the "be a man" comments that people are making? What does that mean exactly? Doesn't that play into stereotypes. I don't think some women here would appreciate it if someone said to them "would you just behave like a woman".

I can't help the intimidation factor. Just the thought of approaching pretty women it enters my mind..."why would they find me hot looking? there are better looking guys than me around here". I can't control that coming to my mind.

Haven't you seen the "Hot Chicks with Duchebags Thread?" B)

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There are plenty of women here who have said many times they think it should be the man that asks for the number and asks the women out. I have chatted with them about it when they have said that I should be the one doing it.

Yes, you should be the one doing it, not "the man", but you, because it's you who's not getting any. They didn't say it because you're a man, because your life is your responsibility. Yes, you're accidentaly a male, but that's not the point.

When I'm down, my friend tells me "do something." No one will ever advise you to sit back and wait. Wake up.

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What's with the "be a man" comments that people are making? What does that mean exactly? Doesn't that play into stereotypes. I don't think some women here would appreciate it if someone said to them "would you just behave like a woman".

Dear spats, that means "stop acting like a whining kid, behave like a grown-up man."

It doesn't play into stereotypes, you only want to see it that way. :rolleyes:

There is no hope for you.

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