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Spats' Loveblahblahblah Thread


Lake of Shadows

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People want you to step up and BE A MAN because you are complaining about a problem-which is, no dates-in your life that YOU are in control of. A real man would know that you can't expect any problem to fix itself, you have to take action. If the women of Toronto were coming in here, complaining about how they wish this guy Spats would talk to them, it would be different. THEY aren't complaining, YOU are.

And yes, women are expected to "act like a lady"...it's not really as big of an insult as you make it out to be. And most women like to be viewed as a woman anyways. Are you unhappy to be your gender? Is that why this bothers you?

It is intimidating to ANYONE to approach a stranger, not just men. Men are way more likely to judge a woman solely on looks than a woman is to do that to a guy. Most women will give a guy a chance as long as he has a nice personality, even if she thinks the guy is only slightly cute.

The "be a man" comment is promoting a bad stereotype. Do real men not have insecurities and fear of rejection??? I am surprised so many are using it. If a guy told a woman to "start acting like a woman", she would be offended.

Women care about looks just a smuch as men do and reject plenty of men of bad looks. I hav expereinced it and other guys have.

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Yes, you should be the one doing it, not "the man", but you, because it's you who's not getting any. They didn't say it because you're a man, because your life is your responsibility. Yes, you're accidentaly a male, but that's not the point.

When I'm down, my friend tells me "do something." No one will ever advise you to sit back and wait. Wake up.

But at the same time friends will not tell you to keep doing something that you are not successful at either will they?

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We went to harbourfront this weekend but the girl i like was with her girlfriends again. I made small talk with her and she looked really good but again her girlfriends were sitting right there and it made me too self concious. if she were looking to get something going with me i don't think she would be hanging out with her girlfriends. She is going to be there again this evening but i don't know if i am gonna bother going.

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The "be a man" comment is promoting a bad stereotype. Do real men not have insecurities and fear of rejection??? I am surprised so many are using it. If a guy told a woman to "start acting like a woman", she would be offended.

Women care about looks just a smuch as men do and reject plenty of men of bad looks. I have expereinced it and other guys have.

The answer to your prayers muh man! B)

beer2.jpg

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The "be a man" comment is promoting a bad stereotype. Do real men not have insecurities and fear of rejection??? I am surprised so many are using it. If a guy told a woman to "start acting like a woman", she would be offended.

Women care about looks just a smuch as men do and reject plenty of men of bad looks. I hav expereinced it and other guys have.

Stop being so goddamn obstinate.

You:

V

V

obstinate

ob·sti·nate [ óbstinət ]

adjective

Definition:

1. stubborn: determined not to agree with other people's wishes or accept their suggestions

2. refusing to change: unwilling to change or give up something such as an idea or attitude

3. difficult to control: difficult to control, get rid of, solve, or cure

an obstinate blockage in the pipe

[14th century. < Latin obstinatus, past participle of obstinare "be resolved," literally "stand by" < stare "to stand"]

ob·sti·na·cy noun

ob·sti·nate·ly adverb

ob·sti·nate·ness noun

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In this case they would. Or maybe I should say they did.

You are right. My buddies have to an extent. They have said if they were in my postion they would keep approaching girls until they were successful. That's easy for them to say though because they usually have more success than me. They would not go through the rejection i would and have. And they have thicker skin than i have.

But i think it's wrong to tell someone to keep humiliating themselves over and over.

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Stop being so goddamn obstinate.

You:

V

V

obstinate

ob·sti·nate [ óbstinət ]

adjective

Definition:

1. stubborn: determined not to agree with other people's wishes or accept their suggestions

2. refusing to change: unwilling to change or give up something such as an idea or attitude

3. difficult to control: difficult to control, get rid of, solve, or cure

an obstinate blockage in the pipe

[14th century. < Latin obstinatus, past participle of obstinare "be resolved," literally "stand by" < stare "to stand"]

ob·sti·na·cy noun

ob·sti·nate·ly adverb

ob·sti·nate·ness noun

I am just saying how it see it. Real men have insecurites and fears too. Expecting a guy to just be Mr.Alpha male and dive in head first is just unrealistic.

And women care about looks just as much as men do. I don't buy that they are more accepting of ba d looks than men are.

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Once again last night she was doing a "ladies night". Ugh. I think i am gonna have to wait until she is not out with her "posse". There is no way to really get a chance to do anything will all of them around. it's just completed ruined when you are outnumbered. it's hard enough when it's one on one.

I think if she were really interested she would notice that i am outnumbered and make it easier for me and chat with them not around. None of that is happening.

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You are right. My buddies have to an extent. They have said if they were in my postion they would keep approaching girls until they were successful. That's easy for them to say though because they usually have more success than me. They would not go through the rejection i would and have. And they have thicker skin than i have.

Isn't that because they are more active than you?

But i think it's wrong to tell someone to keep humiliating themselves over and over.

Okay, if it's humiliating for you, stay alone.

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Isn't that because they are more active than you?

Okay, if it's humiliating for you, stay alone.

I don't know if it's because they are more active. But if one of my friends approached 5 women. They would at least be successful with a couple of them. Or have them come to him. With me if i approached five women i would be 0 for 5. And i am not getting approached as much as they get approached. And when i am approached or a girl chats me up the girl really isn't my type.

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OMG! This is like a bad soap opera, I've been gone 6 days and nothings changed! :blink:

The bad part is that Harbourfront season will be wrapping up in early September. I like it down there. Nice atmosphere, music, food, hot women. In the fall all there will be is the clubs again. <_<

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So basically, even when you are approached you don't like her? Are you good at small talk spats? If not you should work to improve your small talk skills.

The girls i was last approached by were not my type. A nice girl chatted me up a while ago at Harbourfront but she was just not the type i like.That's just my luck lately. I don't understand why it happens that way and not the way that i want. I need it to click where i am approached by i girl that i want.

I am pretty good at small talk depending on who the girl is. If it's a girl i find really hot then i can get distracted. Otherwise small talk is not a problem. It's the indepth talks i have a problem with. :D

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A friend suggested that one night that we go out i should just approach as many women as possible just to see what happens. And if i get slaughtered he will never suggest it again and he will admit i am right that it's not best for me to do that.

The last time i did something similar i handed out my number to a couple women and never got any phone calls. It was not good.

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We went to harbourfront this weekend but the girl i like was with her girlfriends again. I made small talk with her and she looked really good but again her girlfriends were sitting right there and it made me too self concious. if she were looking to get something going with me i don't think she would be hanging out with her girlfriends. She is going to be there again this evening but i don't know if i am gonna bother going.

Why can't you just say to her, would you like to take a walk? If she declines, you know she is NOT interested and you can move on. If she accepts, well, don't blow it, lol. No pain, no gain...you have to take risks in life.

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I am just saying how it see it. Real men have insecurites and fears too. Expecting a guy to just be Mr.Alpha male and dive in head first is just unrealistic.

And women care about looks just as much as men do. I don't buy that they are more accepting of ba d looks than men are.

I know that you are trying to explain things to me, but all I'm seeing is "wah wah wah...I'm a total girly-pants...wah wah wah"

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I am just saying how it see it. Real men have insecurites and fears too. Expecting a guy to just be Mr.Alpha male and dive in head first is just unrealistic.

Yes, they do. I date one.

At least he acknowledges that it has made his life much harder, unlike you. Insecurity is not an alternative, it's a complication.

No one expects you to be Mr. Alpha Male, people are just saying that you should do something. Anything. The only way to succeed in spite of your fears is to overcome them. Believe me, I know very well what I'm talking about.

And women care about looks just as much as men do. I don't buy that they are more accepting of ba d looks than men are.

Who cares...

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