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Everything posted by Khandie

  1. Do you work for UPS? I thought I saw you checking out my package You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more? Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money? I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you. Wanna play army? I'll lay down and you can blow me to smithereens. I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Walmart, so I could ride you all day long for a quarter. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again? Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me. My name isn't Elmo, but
  2. Khandie

    Photos !

    Now that we all know your sexual preferences, time to move on.
  3. Never thought of it before but my son was born on the 3rd and my daughter was born on the 9th.
  4. Khandie

    Photos !

    A few pictures from my home town
  5. Glad you had fun with ZFF. Texas is good for a short time not a long time. that's just my opinion.
  6. who the hell wants a Texas licence plate. It's too fuckin hot there!
  7. is lovin' life

  8. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have. Ralph and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool. Ralph suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled him out. When the Head Nurse Director became aware of Edna's heroic act she immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now considered her to be mentally stable.
  9. Mike was going to be married to Karen so his Father sat him down for a little chat... He said, 'Mike, let me tell you something... On my wedding night in our honeymoon suite, I took off my pants, handed them to your Mother, and said, 'Here - try these on'... She did and said, These are too big... I can't wear them... I replied, 'Exactly... I wear the pants in this family and I always will... Ever since that night, we have never had any problems.. 'Hmmm,' said Mike... He thought that might be a good thing to try.. On his honeymoon, Mike took off his pants and said to Karen, Here - t
  10. Thanks, I only got the bonus question right.
  11. Test for Dementia Below are four ( 4) questions and a bonus question. You have to answer them instantly. You can't take your time, answer all of them immediately. OK? Let's find out just how clever you really are.... Ready? GO!!! First Question: You are participating in a race. You overtake the second person. What position are you in? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Answer: If you answered that you are first, then you are absolutely wrong! If you overtake the second person and you take his place, you are second! Try no
  12. Universal Laws 1. Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee. 2. Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner. 3. Law of Probability - The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act 4. Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone always answers. 5. Law of the Alibi - If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire
  13. My sister gave it to me for christmas. I haven't read it yet, maybe I should start reading it today. Pretty sure she bought it at chapters book store.
  14. Eve's Side of the story After three weeks in The Garden of Eden God came to visit Eve. 'So how is everything going? inquired God. It is all so beautiful, God, she replied. The sunrises and sunsets are breathtaking , the smells, the sights, everything is wonderful, but I have just one problem. It's these breast you have given me. The middle one pushes the other two out and I'm constantly knocking them with my arms, catching them on branches and snagging them on bushes. There a real pain... Eve went on to tell God that since many of her body parts came in pairs, such as h
  15. This one me me laugh every time I see it.
  16. A guy runs into a childhood pal. "Hey, long time no see, what are you doing for yourself these days?" "I'm a fireman." "Really!? My 15-year-old kid wants to be a fireman." "Well, if you want some good advice, you've got to install a pole in your house so your kid can practice. The hardest thing for a fireman is to jump off into space and catch that pole in the middle of the night." Ten years later, the two guys happen to meet again. "So, did your son become a fireman?" "No, but I have two daughters who are Exotic Dancers!
  17. I think you should have waited longer or had more replies before you made your list. Maybe you should repost it in the poll section or ramble on section. Just a thought.
  18. Since I've Been Loving' You The Ocean Achilles Last Stand Ramble on The Rover
  19. Khandie

    Roberts Jeans

    Well he really doesn't do it for me. I'll take Jimmy any day over Robert. Sweet Dreams Deb!
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