Give him incentive, lol. Explain "if the living room was neater, i might want to fool around on the floor" for example. If he needs some "messy" space maybe you can designate one room where he can be a slob, but tell him the rest of the house is a team effort to keep clean. You may need to do more of the work, but in many relationships that's the way it is. My main point has been, consider all the good you receive from this relationship and don't dwell on your part of the bargain. If someone feels it's not worth it (to be a housekeeper to their man, lol) then they should move on. You obviously love your man, so continue to try to persuade him to cooperate, but don't lose sight of what you find most important about the love affair.

This sounds similar to what i was talking about on the pet peeves thread. Sometimes a partnership includes picking up after someone, lol. So maybe instead of doing it so bitchy, you could use a little humor to get your hubby to understand your desire. Train him, Medhb! Ragging on men almost never works! It just leaves you both frustrated. At this point, i want to hear your man is picking up his own trash!

Well it was yesterday. Realizing my newest friend finally knows i'm on his side and maybe he accepts my love, too. and Wooty is sleeping so soundly!

Real friends and family do protect one another. It's nice to be involved in this kind of relationship. You don't have to ask yourself if these people are loyal, you just feel it. When the love is coming from someone capable of loving, it is indeed the answer. I always love to hear a John Lennon mention, btw. So here's to family, friends and friends who love each other Don't slam the door in their faces, lol.

Sanford and Son was funny. I had a neighbor who would put so much junk out the night before trash day my ex spouse would imitate the song to that show as we watched her putting her crap out, and we would crack up. Well thanks to TV land you can still catch that sometimes, and i also love The Jeffersons, and for Del, All In The Family.

I was anticipating a cat fight, lol. I said i was sticking up for the men because frankly, sometimes they get a bad rap. Maybe i've heard your gripes about your man so, so, many times before that i just feel like, hey, we get it. How about cut him a break, OR teach him to come over to your way of thinking. It can be done. I have done it. Maybe i should have been more clear. My pet peeve is: women who bitch about good men they are lucky to have in their lives! I don't live with you guys (so i don't know) maybe you don't rag on him as badly as it sounded to me. btw...i know it's part of the culture for women to talk this way in the Delaware Valley and nearby outskirts

I was replying to a post someone made to me. Sorry i gave advice that was kind, instead of bitchy...next time i'll try to remember what thread i'm posting in. My humble apologies, again.

We still have the ice cream man, in fact he came by the house around 4pm this afternoon.

Not a twin, but she's younger...lol. I have learned what i find important in a relationship, that's all. It's all give and take, compromise, and hopefully good communication. If you have those things, it shouldn't be so difficult to gently train your partner to be more considerate with his trash. If that doesn't work, consider what you are getting out of the deal and just assist him if he needs it. Like your sig says, don't sweat the petty stuff (or something like that). We ALL have annoying habits i'm sure.

Well when you play in the woods nowadays you wind up with Lyme's disease, lol. But i get your point. I loved playing in dirt and fields where you could run around and walking in the woods to the nearby stream. It was adventurous and got your imagination flowing and developed brain power.

I'm a girl and i have lived with a few men in my lifetime. While i know this kind of thing happens, it peeves me to hear women complain so vehemently about it. You choose to live with this man and you probably love him. Everyone has flaws and that's something you accept when you live with someone. My exhusband was a "slob" and i would say the reason was his mom did all the cleaning up for her 3 children. He never learned to clean or clean up after himself. I taught him over the years, but expected i would sometimes still have to clean up after him. However, he did plenty for me, so it balanced out. It's just the same old ragging on your man story i have heard from friends over the years, and my feeling is, if you love this person, why air your "dirty laundry" to everyone. Respect him. Resolve these issues with him or just give up if you find it's a lost cause. Think about why you are involved with him in the first place and realize the relationship is worth the give and take that it requires. Yes men, i'm sticking up for you, at the risk of a cat fight ensuing! I just feel like i am more than willing to learn to live with the flaws of someone i want to be with. I will try to change habits i don't care for, but i don't want to tell the world how annoying they are about the man i choose to live with and love. In fact, when you love someone enough, the flaws are barely noticable and of little importance.

Whatever happened to good sitcoms like "Who's the Boss" and "Full House". Remember when "The Honeymooners" and "I Love Lucy" were on the tube, funny stuff.

reminds me of "Immigrant Song"

My favorite artist, especially love the gardens at giverny and the water lillies:

The Cure - Trust there's no-one left in the world that i can hold on to there is really no one left at all there is only you and if you leave me now you leave all that we were undone there is really no one left you are the only one and still the hardest part for you to put your trust in me i love you more than i can say why won't you just believe?

An atypical response, all the other guys are making the comments i would expect, lol. You show respect and that's really nice.

If the parents don't get along, the kids know. IMO, the kids don't necessarily benefit from the situation. My parents have been married 40 years and all i can remember since i was 4 or 5 is them fighting and yelling alot. I remember at age 11 or 12 wishing they would divorce. My mom has claimed to be miserable for many years now, but in their case there really isn't any reason to divorce at this point. They are both too old. On to the song, have you heard it? The way it's sung makes me believe no question. That song reminds me of many people i know (some lovers, some good friends, some siblings). Anyway, i'm not saying everyone will find that, i'm just saying that is WHY people look for happiness and love. Oh hey, i just wanted a reason to post that song, i heard it yesterday and it always makes me feel good.

Don't be fooled by all the positive stories, lol. For every one you hear there are at least three bads ones in real life.

I have had many good and a couple not so good long term relationships. I am not at all jaded because the good ones seriously overwhelm the not so good. I am presently crazy about someone, time will tell if things evolve (i'm hopeful). My marriage failed because i married a wonderful friend who i didn't want intimacy with. To anyone who is presently staying married 5 more years for the sake of the children (and refers to the marriage as a prison sentence) i would say get out. There is no reason to stay with someone you feel is your prison warden. At least in my marriage, i was catered to, lol. That made it hard for me to leave. I don't believe another person can make you happy if you don't already love yourself. But if you do, finding that special person can make your life so much more fulfilling than being alone (i know this for a fact). For Spats: to answer your question, from earlier, i offer what i consider to be a beautiful song with meaningful lyrics. This is what i hope my next mate and i will have. This song exemplifies why people want to be "happily together". btw (you need to listen to the song to get the feeling if you aren't already familiar with the song). Incubus Dig Lyrics We all have a weakness But some of ours are easy to identify. Look me in the eye, and ask for forgiveness. We'll make a pact to never speak that word again. Yes, you are my friend. We all have something that digs at us, at least we dig each other. So when weakness turns my ego up I know you'll count on me from yesterday. If I turn into another dig me up from under what is covering the better part of me. Sing this song remind me that we'll always have each other when everything else is gone. We all have a sickness that cleverly attaches and multiplies No matter how we try. We all have someone that digs at us, at least we dig each other. So when sickness turns my ego up I know you'll act as a clever medicine. If I turn into another, dig me up from under what is covering The better part of me. Sing this song! Remind me that we'll always have each other when everything else is gone. Oh, each other when everything else is gone. If I turn into another dig me up from under what is covering the better part of me. Sing this song remind me that we'll always have each other when everything else is gone. Oh, each other when everything else is gone.

I think all couples should have to dress identical so they lose their identity, lol. and so others know they are "together". Seriously that was a joke. A Pet Peeve is: feeling rotten.

I'm in awe of anyone who can play it half as good as Jimmy does. My favorite Led Zeppelin song.

I'm not suggesting it's okay for a woman to treat her significant other that way, either. But this situation was a man grabbing (or two men) a woman. The reverse would be just as wrong imo. Despite it being his mother, i think he could have attempted to handle the situation without grabbing that dumb girl. He could have gotten in her face and said hey back off. I would imagine that would have been intimidating enough. As for his girlfriend, since he seems to think it upset her i think he should discuss it with her and find out how she feels.

I agree with Electrophile's above statements. The situation could have been dealt with in a more tactful manner. By all means you should have defended your mom, but physical contact seems to be an indication of a possible anger issue. Now if she had put her hands on your mom, then i would say retaliation with the same amount of force wouldn't be out of line. I don't know you, so i'm not making judgement on you, just going by my "first impression" in the context of your account of the events.

I went clothes shopping for MYSELF! I found a few nice things, too. It's been a long time since i spent money on clothes for ME! I also got to do it by myself without anyone to slow me down. I love shopping with friends when i'm not on a mission, but today was me time.

I like that approach, DRUNK. It's true actually. I was in a relationship with a liar. Once i became aware of them i took the approach DRUNK mentions. I did catch him in some of the lies, called him on them, and he "sort of" admitted to them, some of the time, lol. Anyway, i would have to say alcohol played a big role in this person's issue with lying. I can see how someone with Borderline Personality Disorder would also have a problem with lying. I know my closest friends are very honest and loyal people. If i had a friend who was a compulsive liar, i would have to decide if the benefits of the relationship were worth dealing with the difficult behavior. My one sister lies a bit, to get others to do for her. The most frequent example is she will ask family members to watch her children because she has something "important" to do, but in fact she winds up going to the mall. Now if she were a friend and not my sister, i would probably end that relationship. Spats, i think you should decide if this friendship is beneficial to you or not. If not then i wouldn't feel guilty if you decide to be finished with it. If you stay friends, I would definitely call this person on their lies as the arise. I wouldn't care if they deny it, i would still tell them what i think.