Oh Honey, what you are sharing with all of us here is you unfolding out of your cocoon and blooming into the beautiful butterfly you were always meant to be. I'm so touched that you have shared this story with us.
We probably talk to people every day who have been through similar tragedies and we aren't even aware of it. We can be blissfully unaware because so many victims do exactly what your mom would have liked you to do....brush it under the rug. But it seems that what many of us don't understand is that it isn't dust that you can just get rid of, it's now become part of your essence, who you are, and how you view life.
I am so proud of you for making it to this point in your recovery and I just know you will go even further! You are such a caring individual, maybe someday you will work in a field that counsels victims of aggression and abuse.
Plus, you are tearing down the walls that are the stigma to these types of crimes. If someone pushed you down on the sidewalk and kicked you in the stomach everyone would be enraged! And you would tell people about it with indignation, not shame! Our culture has made sexual assault something 'dirty'....and it is a shame that the victim is made to feel like THEY are the dirty ones! Oh Honey, keep your head proud and keep seeing your therapist. You have come so far! You have soooo much to be proud of!! It's people like you who can share their stories that will change the way other people view and deal with these situations. And one day, the world will be a better place.
Many Hugs to you....Love, Light and Blessings....Medhb