IpMan Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 That goes for all the self righteous in this ridiculous virtual circle jerk of a thread. If you feel that way why do you keep commenting? For someone who dost protest so much you seem to be doing all the "tugging" in the circle as the rest of us are staring in concerned disbelief. See, we are empathetic, even toward those lacking manners. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Badgeholder Still Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 If you feel that way why do you keep commenting? For someone who dost protest so much you seem to be doing all the "tugging" in the circle as the rest of us are staring in concerned disbelief. See, we are empathetic, even toward those lacking manners. Because it's a public opinion forum and i have an opinion. And an opposing opinion does not a troll make. Don't feign concern for me with mock empathy. You're just proving my point. You refuse to address the content of my post and frame me in an unflattering light. You're a passive aggressive hypocrite which is what i expect from someone who is an "expert" on religon, the original elitist and exclusionary club. It's a discussion forum. Take a passage from my post and refute it. Or otherwise your the troll. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IpMan Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 Because it's a public opinion forum and i have an opinion. And an opposing opinion does not a troll make. Don't feign concern for me with mock empathy. You're just proving my point. You refuse to address the content of my post and frame me in an unflattering light. You're a passive aggressive hypocrite which is what i expect from someone who is an "expert" on religon, the original elitist and exclusionary club. It's a discussion forum. Take a passage from my post and refute it. Or otherwise your the troll. Only you can frame yourself in an unflattering light, don't put that off on others. Talk about an oxymoron, I am commenting on a general lack of manners in society today and I am the hypocrite, I am passive aggressive why, because you don't like my opinion? You know that road goes both ways. I do respect your opinion, I just don't agree with it. If you wish to go through life being an unpleasant chap be my guest, just don't act surprised when people either avoid you or don't like you in general. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cosmic_juice Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 Only you can frame yourself in an unflattering light, don't put that off on others. Talk about an oxymoron, I am commenting on a general lack of manners in society today and I am the hypocrite, I am passive aggressive why, because you don't like my opinion? You know that road goes both ways. I do respect your opinion, I just don't agree with it. If you wish to go through life being an unpleasant chap be my guest, just don't act surprised when people either avoid you or don't like you in general. Ummmm...BOOM!!!.... Now lets see the back pedaling... Wait for it... Wait for it... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redrum Posted March 29, 2015 Share Posted March 29, 2015 Just the other day a teenager held the door for me and I was still about 15 feet away. You have to appreciate that. I still do it despite some people who act like it's your job and you're some kind of doorman with nary a thanks. When I rode the bus I would always give up my seat for the elderly or a woman. Chivalry still lives, at least from my point of view. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slave to zep Posted March 29, 2015 Author Share Posted March 29, 2015 I tend to disagree of your definition of meaningless. When a clerk accknowledges me and says hello, or have a nice day, I accept that it is just good common courtesy. I know after I walk out the door he/she won't give me another thought. But to be acknowleged as a living breathing human being has plenty of meaning, and the same goes back the other way. I feel the same, and even though I do work in retail, I am also a customer at other times of course. And I guess I tend to notice this stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slave to zep Posted March 29, 2015 Author Share Posted March 29, 2015 Just the other day a teenager held the door for me and I was still about 15 feet away. You have to appreciate that. I still do it despite some people who act like it's your job and you're some kind of doorman with nary a thanks. When I rode the bus I would always give up my seat for the elderly or a woman. Chivalry still lives, at least from my point of view. Hi Redrum. That's great to hear Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ScarletMacaw Posted March 30, 2015 Share Posted March 30, 2015 I tend to disagree of your definition of meaningless. When a clerk accknowledges me and says hello, or have a nice day, I accept that it is just good common courtesy. I know after I walk out the door he/she won't give me another thought. But to be acknowleged as a living breathing human being has plenty of meaning, and the same goes back the other way. I guess I don't need that type of acknowledgement. I want the clerk to leave me alone unless I want help. By the way, I have worked in retail. I remember that I had plenty to do helping customers select items. I sold Home Fashions for Lord and Taylor when I was in college. I don't recall getting the impression people wanted to chit-chat. They wanted to know what would be a good gift for their niece, what would be a wine glass that wouldn't break too easily, where the Christmas decorations section was. I didn't expect them to ask me how I was or even smile. I never gave it a moment's thought. The people I chit-chatted with were the other clerks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slave to zep Posted March 30, 2015 Author Share Posted March 30, 2015 [/q I worked in retail when I was younger but I notice stuff too. I feel bad for clerks and cashiers when I see them say hello to a customer who it too busy twiddling with their smart phone to even look up and acknowlege them with a reply. So when it's my turn I try to get at least a smile out of them by saying something nice if it is possible. I love customers - PEOPLE like you. It's always a pleasure to serve someone like you. Believe me, we cop so much crap and are pretty well flat oyt all day, so when we get a pleasant person like you it can make our day. Pity some others just don't get it.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slave to zep Posted March 30, 2015 Author Share Posted March 30, 2015 I don't think I need it, but I do appreciate it. But I do hear what you say about chit-chat when that spills over into taking time from other customers. But I'm kind of goofy that way still, sort of like Crocodile Dundee saying g'day to eveyone he passed on a busy NY street. Oh yes I am mindful of talking if others are waiting, which is most of the time! I'd love to chat for much longer a lot of the time, but usually it's just a minute or less, and I have always got heaps of work waiting. ... but I do believe that a lot of people tend to shop where they feel most comfortable (among other reasons of course! ). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slave to zep Posted March 30, 2015 Author Share Posted March 30, 2015 I have my favorites at the market and will usually wait in their line even if it is longer. It just makes going to the market so much less of chore when everyone is friendly. At the end of my day a smile and a hello goes a long way. Thanks. Yes I have a few that will only be served by me . They are all quite elderly, and I enjoy helping them. And its the same for me when I am a customer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kiwi_Zep_Fan87 Posted March 30, 2015 Share Posted March 30, 2015 FWIW, when someone be it a total stranger or a staff member at a deli or at a supermarket actually takes the time to smile at me and ask how I am, I do feel the need to respond! My mentality is such that I think that it is very kind of that person to actually think of me for at least a couple of seconds and ask about my day or how I am feeling! Perhaps that might seem strange to some, but I guess that's how I am! Also, even if I don't require any help in looking for something at say for instance, a book shop, if a store clerk comes up to me and asks me if I need any help, my response is to smile and say, no, thank you! Perhaps some people would consider the behaviour of the clerk to be intrusive but I would like to reiterate a point that I made in an earlier post. It does not take much time at all to smile at someone and say thank you. There have also been quite a few instances where, while shopping for music CDs, I have struck up interesting conversations with some very friendly store clerks who have not only recommended the names of bands and artists who were previously unknown to me, but who have above all, made my shopping experiences very happy ones! There is also a nifty little saying called "Manners Maketh The Man" which simply translates into manners emerging out of the goodness of our hearts (due to genuine kindness), irrespective of how busy and preoccupied we all might be, in this "fast-paced" world of ours. Bottom line: A store clerk (or anyone on this planet for that matter!) need not take the time to be kind to you, let alone even acknowledge your existence. It is not their job. So, don't take anyone's kindness and good nature for granted. For instance. I had a horrid experience at a bakery a few years ago, where a lady who was briefing customers on the range of pastries being made along with other details, practically shouted at me, when I asked her a few simple questions : "Do you make egg less cakes as well?" (since my dad is a diabetic) and "for how long will these cakes stay fresh?". I thought these were perfectly normal and innocent questions but after shouting at me for committing the crime of asking these questions, she even accused me of making her look like a fool in front of the other 'guests' in the store! Needless to say, I told her to get stuffed and never set foot in that bakery again! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimmie ray Posted March 30, 2015 Share Posted March 30, 2015 ^One quaint thing about city/urban folks who move to the suburbs, is that they do tend to sit out on their porch and say hello when people pass by. Most people don't tend to do that in neighborhoods, any more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimmie ray Posted March 30, 2015 Share Posted March 30, 2015 ^I happen to support that - shaming people into acting normal, if they can't recognize offensiveness by themselves. But that's not the way society is heading, now. Everyone is encouraged to be themselves, in spite of how rude or how much it offends the norm. Chivalry and other values are viewed as bowing to some imaginary oppression. Pathetic way to view the world... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slave to zep Posted March 31, 2015 Author Share Posted March 31, 2015 ^One quaint thing about city/urban folks who move to the suburbs, is that they do tend to sit out on their porch and say hello when people pass by. Most people don't tend to do that in neighborhoods, any more. Yep I agree. I am from a small country town. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slave to zep Posted March 31, 2015 Author Share Posted March 31, 2015 ^I happen to support that - shaming people into acting normal, if they can't recognize offensiveness by themselves. But that's not the way society is heading, now. Everyone is encouraged to be themselves, in spite of how rude or how much it offends the norm. Chivalry and other values are viewed as bowing to some imaginary oppression. Pathetic way to view the world... Yes sadly it's all about ME these days. and kids are rewarded for the smallest thing... some schools give trophies to every child in the race for " participating".... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pagefan55 Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 ^^^ That's classic. I once saw a bumper sticker that read, "Our child was inmate of the month at County Jail." Lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kiwi_Zep_Fan87 Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 I grew up in the suburbs of a big city. My way of thinking is just like my mum's. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kiwi_Zep_Fan87 Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 Great post, Kiwi! I worked in the hospitality industry for a number of years while in high school and college. Being generally kind to others is part of my overall attitude. My wife is always blown away when she goes to our usual local grocery store or take out restaurant in my place and they treat her like royalty because she is my wife and the know me well. It's not like I'm in there kissing ass, just being pleasant and friendly to them and they remember my name when I call in an order or immediately recognize my face when I walk in. It's just about treating others as you would want to be treated. Remember "the golden rule"? I don't do it for those favors, just that I remember being on the other side of the counter. Thank you, Walter! I can tell from your posts that you are a very pleasant, well mannered and nice guy, overall. It doesn't surprise me in the least that the staff at your local grocery store or the take out restaurant treat you and your family well! I am sure you loved interacting with at least some of the customers whenever you could, during the time you worked in the hospitality industry! I used to help out sometimes during the summer at the Uni library in the City Campus, to earn a bit of extra cash and to make myself useful! There used to be a couple of very studious students who used to walk in and ask for hard to find books (which were available only at other libraries at other campuses) and when there wasn't a very long queue, I also got a chance to chat with some of them (who happened to be specializing in the same subject as me, but were a year or two junior to me) about all sorts of aspects like course work, professors, future plans and one kid even asked me (after requesting for a rare book on Econometric modelling) whether the library stocks Mick Wall's "When Giants Walked The Earth" Apparently, she had just started discovering Led Zeppelin, thanks to her older brother and wanted to read about the band! Ah! Fun times!! And the phrase "treat people the way you want to be treated" is such an important life lesson but most people, unfortunately seem to forget it! *Sigh! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slave to zep Posted March 31, 2015 Author Share Posted March 31, 2015 I love what George Carlin said about parents who plaster their cars with bumper sticker about their kids. Carlin- “Here’s a bumper sticker I’d like to see: “We are the proud parents of a child who’s self-esteem is sufficient that he doesn’t need us promoting his minor scholastic achievements on the back of our car.” love it ^^^ That's classic. I once saw a bumper sticker that read, "Our child was inmate of the month at County Jail." Lol. oh dear ..... yeah, Walter is a good guy and you are one of the nicest people I have never met ♥ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kiwi_Zep_Fan87 Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 ^^^Hi Julie! It has been an incredible 5 year journey for me here on these forums wherein I have met some really lovely people like you, Strider, Magic and Walter and I consider myself incredibly lucky, to be honest! Looking forward to more wonderful conversations and friendships, aboard this forum! In the midst of the recent Germanwings aviation tragedy, I must say that I was incredibly scornful of that co-pilot who took his own life, without in the least bothering about the 100's of lives he was responsible for in one go, just because he knew that he was unable to fulfill his own ambitions. Now, today, I came across a heart warming letter, written by a lady (who is a frequent flyer) to the pilot of the plane she was on, to extend some compassion and understanding his way, in the midst of all the recent aviation tragedies. This is what she had to say: Dear pilots of the plane taking me home, In light of the very recent tragedy in the French Alps and the loss of those poor 150 people, I feel the need to reach out to you and extend a compassionate hand. At the end of the day, we are all humans just trying to live this roller coaster of a life, we have been handed. I understand an event so horrific as this one, affects those with your responsibility, and maybe sometimes, a kind word, random but heartfelt, can make a difference. I'm hoping to create a ripple effect and spread some compassion and understanding. Thank you for taking me home. Thank you for doing so safely. Thank you for allowing me to live the life I do in Spain and split my time with my family in England too. You make the excitement I feel now, to see my family, possible. I hope you get to see your families soon. I've had a wonderful flight and I hope you had too. You're making a massive difference and you're the reason I can smile tonight. Take care and spread love, Kindest regards, Bethanie. Honestly, after reading this letter, my faith in humanity was restored! Julie, I firmly believe that chivalry is not dead. You just need to know where to look for it and you just need to rise to the occasion and do the right thing by "paying it forward"! Edited to add: Here is the link to the original article : https://nz.totaltravel.yahoo.com/news/a/26883114/heartwarming-letter-to-pilot/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slave to zep Posted April 1, 2015 Author Share Posted April 1, 2015 ^^^Hi Julie! It has been an incredible 5 year journey for me here on these forums wherein I have met some really lovely people like you, Strider, Magic and Walter and I consider myself incredibly lucky, to be honest! Looking forward to more wonderful conversations and friendships, aboard this forum! In the midst of the recent Germanwings aviation tragedy, I must say that I was incredibly scornful of that co-pilot who took his own life, without in the least bothering about the 100's of lives he was responsible for in one go, just because he knew that he was unable to fulfill his own ambitions. Now, today, I came across a heart warming letter, written by a lady (who is a frequent flyer) to the pilot of the plane she was on, to extend some compassion and understanding his way, in the midst of all the recent aviation tragedies. This is what she had to say: Dear pilots of the plane taking me home, In light of the very recent tragedy in the French Alps and the loss of those poor 150 people, I feel the need to reach out to you and extend a compassionate hand. At the end of the day, we are all humans just trying to live this roller coaster of a life, we have been handed. I understand an event so horrific as this one, affects those with your responsibility, and maybe sometimes, a kind word, random but heartfelt, can make a difference. I'm hoping to create a ripple effect and spread some compassion and understanding. Thank you for taking me home. Thank you for doing so safely. Thank you for allowing me to live the life I do in Spain and split my time with my family in England too. You make the excitement I feel now, to see my family, possible. I hope you get to see your families soon. I've had a wonderful flight and I hope you had too. You're making a massive difference and you're the reason I can smile tonight. Take care and spread love, Kindest regards, Bethanie. Honestly, after reading this letter, my faith in humanity was restored! Julie, I firmly believe that chivalry is not dead. You just need to know where to look for it and you just need to rise to the occasion and do the right thing by "paying it forward"! Edited to add: Here is the link to the original article : https://nz.totaltravel.yahoo.com/news/a/26883114/heartwarming-letter-to-pilot/ That is wonderful to know that there still is such thoughtful people out there. Very heart warming ♥ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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