Dzldoc Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virginia Posted March 13, 2008 Share Posted March 13, 2008 Lordy I can't believe I'm putting this up, but enjoy! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zVoIT7oUC3s Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Rover Posted March 13, 2008 Share Posted March 13, 2008 Mandy Farting http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=avSoKXtaA68 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zepyep Posted March 14, 2008 Share Posted March 14, 2008 A fart it is a pleasant thing, It gives the belly ease, It warms the bed in winter, And suffocates the fleas. A fart can be quiet, A fart can be loud, Some leave a powerful, Poisonous cloud A fart can be short, Or a fart can be long, Some farts have been known To sound like a song...... A fart can create A most curious medley, A fart can be harmless, Or silent , and deadly. A fart might not smell, While others are vile, A fart may pass quickly, Or linger a while...... A fart can occur In a number of places, And leave everyone there, With strange looks on their faces. From a wide-open prairie, To a small elevator, A fart will find all of us Sooner or later. But farts are all bad, Is simply not true- We must never forget....... Good old farts like you! KB (BOF) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dragster Posted March 14, 2008 Share Posted March 14, 2008 This thread looks like it's a bit...............................SMELLY!!!!............anyway, for the affacinados, there plenty of websites out there to "FART AWAY ON THE THIN ICE OF THE NEW DAY, HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!!! Dedicated to all the farters out there, courtesy of Butthole Surfers! : Ten foot tall and the nurse stuck a needle in my arm Well Uncle Doc's nurse use a needle with ungodly charm Walkin' down the hall the dentist loomed through the door I Saw an X-Ray of a girl passing gas The one shot theory got a query things got rolling at last Hey, hey hey daddy, why die in the war Jesus Hitler Buddha Santa Mary Klaus Barbie (???) Well Ben got arrested and the sky was the ocean that day Words got twisted and history didn't know what to say God dog sex death life and now I'm feeling old These images were conjured up by talking on the telephone I Saw an X-Ray of a girl passing gas Oh my God it seems like just the other day But it might have been one hundred years before And I know there is no other way We only have to wonder what it's for Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redrum Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 Pull my finger! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Del Zeppnile Posted March 19, 2008 Share Posted March 19, 2008 How about when a little kid is running down the hall, farting with every step? Those are called "the walkin' farts" but usaully they apply to grandmas. Also when somebody farts in one place and then walks to another spot with the fart following behind them is called "tug boat". Example: Wow, dude did you just fart? Oh sorry, I think I tug boated one out of the restroom with me. When I worked at the supermarket and had to stand for hours at a checkstand and needed to let out a little "pressure" --- I would wait until a really old person was near by and then let it out. I figured most people would immeadiatily blame it on the old guy in the wheelchair. I know, people go to hell for stuff like that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
donkey Posted March 19, 2008 Share Posted March 19, 2008 Who farted? donkey Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dragster Posted March 19, 2008 Share Posted March 19, 2008 FART AWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYY!!! :) http://farts.netcarver.com/index2.htm Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*I*LOVE*JIMMY!! Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 The quote I ment to respond to was virgina'sMandy Farting http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=avSoKXtaA68 I just woke up the people upstairs in my flat! I laughed so loud. GOOD ONE Virgina!!!! Nice thread Ledsabbath Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*I*LOVE*JIMMY!! Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 An a serious note: Man Dies from Breathing Own Farts A terrible diet and room with no ventilation are being blamed for the death of a man who was killed by his own gas. There was no mark on his body but an autopsy showed large amounts of methane gas in his system. His diet had consisted primarily of beans and cabbage (and a couple of other things). It was just the right combination of foods. It appears that the man died in his sleep from breathing the poisonous cloud that was hanging over his bed. Had he been outside or had his windows been opened, it wouldn't have been fatal, but the man was shut up in his near airtight bedroom. According to the article, "He was a big man with a huge capacity for creating 'this deadly gas.'" Three of the rescuers got sick and one was hospitalized." If it wasn't so sad it would be funny, I still couldn't help myself...lol:whistling: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
L 7 Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 Beans Beans! Good for the heart The more you eat The more you fart The more you fart The better you feel Eat pork and beans For every meal I can`t believe I resorted to potty humor. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Ace Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 Had the window been open, the news item might've read : Neighborhood drowned in gastric gases.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*I*LOVE*JIMMY!! Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 Here's one just for Tomy! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3hrsoflunacy Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 The definition of SURPRISE: A fart with a lump in it. That's called a "SHART" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3hrsoflunacy Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 This one time (at bandcamp) during my Sophomore year in high school a bunch of us guys were letting "silent but deadly" ones go during class. So, I tried to chip in, but mine didn't come out silent. It was LOUD and I was quite embarrassed because not only was it loud, but I got blamed for all the silent ones. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoubleNecker Posted April 1, 2008 Share Posted April 1, 2008 Who doesn't like to fart? It's classic! Sometimes they are funny, sometimes they are a pain. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jabe Posted April 1, 2008 Share Posted April 1, 2008 Fart spelled backward is "traf" In highschool,when I would casually mention someone "traffed"nobody knew what the hell I was talking about. Unless they got a whiff and figured my lingo out. I never told anyone my codeword and nobody ever told me they knew what the hell I was talking about. Of course,this didn't occur everyday.Maybe once to twice a week,if that. True story. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dragster Posted April 2, 2008 Share Posted April 2, 2008 Here's one just for Tomy! That's quite effective! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dragster Posted April 2, 2008 Share Posted April 2, 2008 An a serious note: Man Dies from Breathing Own Farts A terrible diet and room with no ventilation are being blamed for the death of a man who was killed by his own gas. There was no mark on his body but an autopsy showed large amounts of methane gas in his system. His diet had consisted primarily of beans and cabbage (and a couple of other things). It was just the right combination of foods. It appears that the man died in his sleep from breathing the poisonous cloud that was hanging over his bed. Had he been outside or had his windows been opened, it wouldn't have been fatal, but the man was shut up in his near airtight bedroom. According to the article, "He was a big man with a huge capacity for creating 'this deadly gas.'" Three of the rescuers got sick and one was hospitalized." If it wasn't so sad it would be funny, I still couldn't help myself...lol:whistling: Get ya gas masks out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redrum Posted April 2, 2008 Share Posted April 2, 2008 When my kid was little, she would fart on the dining room chair with her bare butt, and crack herself up. It had a sharp, percussive sound. When I was a kid, my mom sometimes wore a girdle, and one time she farted in a restaurant- you could hear it coming all the way up that damn girdle like a whistle. The whole family then busted out laughing. My friend's pit bull used to cut farts and then look at his bunghole with such a surprised expression. My other friend John would be walking and all of a sudden with each step he'd lift his leg and out would come a Vut! Vut! Vut! Vut! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dragster Posted April 2, 2008 Share Posted April 2, 2008 Dogs fart the best!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JethroTull Posted April 3, 2008 Share Posted April 3, 2008 My former female boss used to release short and to the point one's, while I would be having a private business related discussion with her. I think it was her way of coming on to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dragster Posted April 3, 2008 Share Posted April 3, 2008 My former female boss used to release short and to the point one's, while I would be having a private business related discussion with her. I think it was her way of coming on to me. Quite a smelly way too!! :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoubleNecker Posted April 3, 2008 Share Posted April 3, 2008 I had it bad a little bit ago. I had some pizza and it was some farts, and STANKY ones at that. They could kill an animal they were so bad....damn! Got rid of the problem though! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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