Spats' Loveblahblahblah Thread

[jimmie ray]

I guess you mean you have to kiss their ass and stroke their ego. .

So don't kiss their ass, and stroke something else...

[spats]

I'd rather be with a man who if he could, would wish to be smart, cultured and sophisticated rather than hot. That would tell me the things he values most about people and himself. And therefore make me more attracted to him.

Think about it.

If he was smart, cultured and sophisticated but looked bad would you still hook up with him?

[spats]

So don't kiss their ass, and stroke something else...

I hope you are kidding.

[Electrophile]

If he was smart, cultured and sophisticated but looked bad would you still hook up with him?

Isn't that what I just said? Read much?

I hope you are kidding.

If you're scared of touching a woman's genitals, get thee to therapy STAT.

[spats]

Isn't that what I just said? Read much?

If you're scared of touching a woman's genitals, get thee to therapy STAT.

I think you are just saying that to prove a point. Nobody completely ignores physical appearance. Especially not at your age.

I thought he meant something else. But i am not very close at all to doing that with this girl right now either.

[Rock Action]

I think you are just saying that to prove a point. Nobody completely ignores physical appearance. Especially not at your age.

I thought he meant something else. But i am not very close at all to doing that with this girl right now either.

And you never will. Ever.

The only thing you'll ever fuck is your fist. Unless of course, you don't think your fist is a "hottie".

[spats]

And you never will. Ever.

The only thing you'll ever fuck is your fist. Unless of course, you don't think your fist is a "hottie".

What i meant was that it's going to take a lot more than singing a bad version of Happy Birthday while under the influence of beer to get me in THAT good with her.

[Electrophile]

I think you are just saying that to prove a point. Nobody completely ignores physical appearance. Especially not at your age.

I didn't say I completely ignore physical appearance. What I said was this:

Smart, cultured, great personality, sense of humor, can carry on a conversation about current events + average looks (not like a male model or porn star = YES

No intelligence, doesn't know who Tolstoy was, shitty personality, no sense of humor, can't find Iraq on a map + drop dead looks = NO

Now, if I can find the first part of A with the second part of B, that would be the ideal, obviously. But that doesn't really exist. So what you do is you look at things that matter more than looks. And that's what I do. None of my previous boyfriends would get a second look from a woman anywhere, because they aren't your stereotypical Abercrombie & Fitch models. But they had far more attractive qualities than looks to me, which is why I was with them. All you do is focus on looks. Looks are a part of the equation yes, but the minor part of the equation. If someone can turn you on with their mind, that's more important.

[spats]

I didn't say I completely ignore physical appearance. What I said was this:

Smart, cultured, great personality, sense of humor, can carry on a conversation about current events + average looks (not like a male model or porn star = YES

No intelligence, doesn't know who Tolstoy was, shitty personality, no sense of humor, can't find Iraq on a map + drop dead looks = NO

Now, if I can find the first part of A with the second part of B, that would be the ideal, obviously. But that doesn't really exist. So what you do is you look at things that matter more than looks. And that's what I do. None of my previous boyfriends would get a second look from a woman anywhere, because they aren't your stereotypical Abercrombie & Fitch models. But they had far more attractive qualities than looks to me, which is why I was with them. All you do is focus on looks. Looks are a part of the equation yes, but the minor part of the equation. If someone can turn you on with their mind, that's more important.

Thanks for clarifying.

I don't only think about looks Elizabeth. I have mentioned that they should be nice, independant, and have a good personailty and other things. i

But i have to say i have never wanted to have sex with a girl because she was an expert at knowing American History.

[spats]

This is the last weekend that Harbourfront festival is open. I like it so much better than the clubs. Unfortunately the girl i like doesn't hang out at the clubs. Don't know how much i will be seeing her after this weekend. Should i try six beers???

[Medhb]

I don't sit and wait for it. I realize it is a privilege. And it's one i never get. If women don't compliment me i will never know if they are attracted to me or not or if i am good looking or not. If a person does not get compliments then they won't think anyone likes how they look.

Rock n roll stars get attention from women no matter what they look like.

Why don't you try DOING something to get complimented instead of BEING something you wish you could get complimented for. People get compliments all the time for things other than their looks.

1. Oh, that's a great shirt, you look good in that color
   
2. Thanks for the laugh, I needed that!
   
3. Oh, you are so kind, thank you for holding the door for me
   
4. Wow, that's great! You are so generous so contribute your time to xxx charity
   
5. Oh, thank you for the compliment! It's so nice of you to comment on xxx
   

In other words, get a life and get a personality. They take you way further in life that 'looks'.

Edited to fix formatting error

[Medhb]

This is the last weekend that Harbourfront festival is open. I like it so much better than the clubs. Unfortunately the girl i like doesn't hang out at the clubs. Don't know how much i will be seeing her after this weekend. Should i try six beers???

How bout 2 and work up the balls to ask for her phone number and then don't be a cheap skate and take her to dinner (doesn't have to be any place fancy) or even lunch! And then see what happens....

[spats]

Why don't you try DOING something to get complimented instead of BEING something you wish you could get complimented for. People get compliments all the time for things other than their looks.

1. Oh, that's a great shirt, you look good in that color
   
2. Thanks for the laugh, I needed that!
   
3. Oh, you are so kind, thank you for holding the door for me
   
4. Wow, that's great! You are so generous so contribute your time to xxx charity
   
5. Oh, thank you for the compliment! It's so nice of you to comment on xxx
   

In other words, get a life and get a personality. They take you way further in life that 'looks'.

Edited to fix formatting error

I know what you mean but those compliments don't tell me that the woman is interested in hooking up with me. Those compliments will just tell me i am a nice guy. I would rather a woman tell me i am cute or great looking than thank me for holding a door.

And i have a life and a personality.

[~Bonnie~]

Yes, those type of guys. Clean cut, well groomed, all american boy looks. I see guys downtown like that with some of the prettiest girls.

I don't know what the women on the forum find physically attractive but it's painfully obvious what a lot of pretty women in my city find to be a turn on. And it's those type of guys.

Dude, I guarantee you, in a city the size of Toronto, you CAN find people not like that. It's just that You yourself are a square, and you hang out with square-ass people, and do square things, and go to square places, and listen to square music, etc. etc. etc. Boring, boring, boring. Try going somewhere you haven't been for once and see what happens.

[longdistancewinner]

I know what you mean but those compliments don't tell me that the woman is interested in hooking up with me. Those compliments will just tell me i am a nice guy. I would rather a woman tell me i am cute or great looking than thank me for holding a door.

And i have a life and a personality.

And, believe it or not, some women like nice guys.

As far as I'm concerned the girl thought it was sweet you sang Happy Birthday to her. That's a compliment. As Medhb said, compliments aren't just directed to your appearance. They can be as subtle as a 'thank you'. Either way, you were complimented. And now you're complaining women don't compliment you? I sure hope that the girl you like isn't reading this.

You may rather have a woman tell you how cute you look, but I guarantee that, come a few years time, you'd be sick to the back teeth of hearing how 'cute' you look. And you'd really be up shit creek if you should start to loose your looks. You'd have become so vain, you'd start to loose whatever redeeming personality traits you once had. And if there's no one to feed your ego what will you do?

You're thinking women won't be interested in you because of the way you look. You're not only assuming women are that superficial, but you're also undermining them.

So here's a hint: It's okay for a guy not to look 'All-American'. It's okay for a guy to sing Happy Birthday to a girl. It's okay for a guy to act goofy infront of her, especially if he likes her. It's okay for a guy to not look and act like every other generic guy out there. It's endearing to some girls.

[~tangerine~]

This is the last weekend that Harbourfront festival is open. I like it so much better than the clubs. Unfortunately the girl i like doesn't hang out at the clubs. Don't know how much i will be seeing her after this weekend. Should i try six beers???

Ask her out. If she says no, at least you won't be running into her for a long time.

[Katuschka]

I would love to look like the all american guy, You know the type of looks i mean.

You would love to look like a slimy idiot?

Clean cut, well groomed, all american boy looks.

[Katuschka]

Smart, cultured, great personality, sense of humor, can carry on a conversation about current events + average looks (not like a male model or porn star = YES

No intelligence, doesn't know who Tolstoy was, shitty personality, no sense of humor, can't find Iraq on a map + drop dead looks = NO

Now, if I can find the first part of A with the second part of B, that would be the ideal, obviously. But that doesn't really exist.

Oh yes, it does.

[spats]

How bout 2 and work up the balls to ask for her phone number and then don't be a cheap skate and take her to dinner (doesn't have to be any place fancy) or even lunch! And then see what happens....

We'll see. I will know better when things are happening. If i feel the nerve to do it I may do it. Or hopefully if she is interested in me she may decide to do it.

I am not a cheap skate. I like to split the bill for other reasons than that.

[spats]

Dude, I guarantee you, in a city the size of Toronto, you CAN find people not like that. It's just that You yourself are a square, and you hang out with square-ass people, and do square things, and go to square places, and listen to square music, etc. etc. etc. Boring, boring, boring. Try going somewhere you haven't been for once and see what happens.

Like where?

[spats]

And, believe it or not, some women like nice guys.

As far as I'm concerned the girl thought it was sweet you sang Happy Birthday to her. That's a compliment. As Medhb said, compliments aren't just directed to your appearance. They can be as subtle as a 'thank you'. Either way, you were complimented. And now you're complaining women don't compliment you? I sure hope that the girl you like isn't reading this.

You may rather have a woman tell you how cute you look, but I guarantee that, come a few years time, you'd be sick to the back teeth of hearing how 'cute' you look. And you'd really be up shit creek if you should start to loose your looks. You'd have become so vain, you'd start to loose whatever redeeming personality traits you once had. And if there's no one to feed your ego what will you do?

You're thinking women won't be interested in you because of the way you look. You're not only assuming women are that superficial, but you're also undermining them.

So here's a hint: It's okay for a guy not to look 'All-American'. It's okay for a guy to sing Happy Birthday to a girl. It's okay for a guy to act goofy infront of her, especially if he likes her. It's okay for a guy to not look and act like every other generic guy out there. It's endearing to some girls.

But i want to be complimented on my looks. Not being nice. I know i am nice. I wouldn't get tired of compliments on my looks.

Tons of women are superficial and i would wager that's why have i been rejected in the past. First impressions are everything. What do you mean i am undermining them?

All of that maybe endearing to some girls but those girls i don't think are the majority and i don't want to be one of those guys. I want to be the opposite.

[spats]

Ask her out. If she says no, at least you won't be running into her for a long time.

You have a point there. Wouldn't it be cool if all the worry about asking her out was thrown out and she asked for my number??? That would make my weekend.

[spats]

You would love to look like a slimy idiot?

That's what women are going for.

[Katuschka]

That's what women are going for.

Are you saying I'm not a woman?

[spats]

Are you saying I'm not a woman?

All am saying is that whenever i see those guys downtown they always have pretty girlfriends and whenever you hear women chat about what they find hot or celebs they find hot they usually look like that.