~tangerine~ Posted June 20, 2008 Share Posted June 20, 2008 Nope. When I arrived home tonight she told me she is meeting her old boyfriend at Outback for drinks and dinner. I said fine. Should I be worried? :blink: Sorry to be blunt, but, Yeah she sucks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tyedye Posted June 20, 2008 Share Posted June 20, 2008 Nope. When I arrived home tonight she told me she is meeting her old boyfriend at Outback for drinks and dinner. I said fine. Should I be worried? I think if she really meant to leave you, she would have done so by now and she is playing mind games with you. She needs to get off her power trip. Call her on it. Tell her she needs to step off or get on and stop playing games. We all say and do things to the one's we love. We are human and make mistakes. If she's going to take this to the 'nth degree, then maybe you should offer her a ride to her date with the x. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dancin'Days Posted June 20, 2008 Share Posted June 20, 2008 Nope. When I arrived home tonight she told me she is meeting her old boyfriend at Outback for drinks and dinner. I said fine. Should I be worried? :blink: Uh......I think I would be worried! It sounds like she has had this planned for awhile. People get bored when they have a lot of time on their hands. "Been dazed and confused for so long it's not true wanted a woman never bargained for you"............... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3hrsoflunacy Posted June 20, 2008 Share Posted June 20, 2008 Jethro, Dude, you need to man up. Sorry to hear you got in a fight, but that's part of married life. If she is this bitter, it sounds like there may be some underlying or unresolved issues going on. Do your best to sincerely apologize, but tell her that meeting an old boyfriend is not acceptable, especially if she is just throwing that in your face. At least it sends a message that you care, although she'll probably just say you are trying to control her. Saying fine is giving up. If she does go, I might be worried if I were you. I would tell her that it was really helpful, I mean hurtful, and ask her straight up what her intentions are about your marriage. Then seek professional help as a last resort, instead of asking people here. 3hrs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marolyn Posted June 20, 2008 Share Posted June 20, 2008 Nope. When I arrived home tonight she told me she is meeting her old boyfriend at Outback for drinks and dinner. I said fine. Should I be worried? :blink: the fact that you said "mean things" and "fine" speaks volumes... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virginia Posted June 20, 2008 Share Posted June 20, 2008 I think if she really wanted to carry on with her ex, she wouldn't tell you she was going to meet him. But she is pretty hurt/PO'd though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hotplant Posted June 20, 2008 Share Posted June 20, 2008 Whoa. This has turned a bit eh? You must've said some really ugly things to her, or I doubt she would announce going out to dinner. That said, a dinner with an old "pal" isn't the end of the world either. I'd be curious to hear her side. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spats Posted June 20, 2008 Share Posted June 20, 2008 I think if she really meant to leave you, she would have done so by now and she is playing mind games with you. She needs to get off her power trip. Call her on it. Tell her she needs to step off or get on and stop playing games. We all say and do things to the one's we love. We are human and make mistakes. If she's going to take this to the 'nth degree, then maybe you should offer her a ride to her date with the x. Exactly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JethroTull Posted June 20, 2008 Author Share Posted June 20, 2008 I heard her come through the front door at 2:30 am. I woke up at 6 am for work and noticed her bra in her handbag. WTF!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spats Posted June 20, 2008 Share Posted June 20, 2008 I heard her come through the front door at 2:30 am. I woke up at 6 am for work and noticed her bra in her handbag. WTF!! Are you making this stuff up???? If you are serious then get her to pack her bags and hit the road. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eternal light Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 I heard her come through the front door at 2:30 am. I woke up at 6 am for work and noticed her bra in her handbag. WTF!! It depends on why it's there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suz Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 I'm no expert, but if you do this long enough, it seems to me, that it may turn into passive aggressiveness and that is when people go nuts. You ARE an expert! That passive/agressive shit is the worst. I hope Jethro and his wife aren't playing mind games with each other, now. It kind of sounds like they are. God, what a waste of life. Man up, woman up, see a marriage counselor, whatever it takes. Anything but that half-assed moping and stewing crap. Ugh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zepyep Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Hi all, I heard her come through the front door at 2:30 am. I woke up at 6 am for work and noticed her bra in her handbag. WTF!! Jethro,man I am sorry.s**t hurts,I know.Chin up,if you can work it out,great.But it takes two to tango.If not then move on,at your own pace,do what you need to do to heal.Get support,don't be like me, an island,... The tango is that both of you might want to give it a second go.Yet from what you said,meettng a old flame,over an arguement,has been done over and over again,the grass is always greener on the other side,sure it is,..... And this not good folks is a womens/mans point of view,we all do it. PM me if you need too,.... KB(from the island) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lzfan715 Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 I heard her come through the front door at 2:30 am. I woke up at 6 am for work and noticed her bra in her handbag. WTF!! I'm really sorry you have to go through this. Maybe you could confront her about it, don't lay blame, just ask her. You may be surprised on her answer. I know I can't really do too much, but if you need to, you can pm me. If you just need someone to talk to, it's fine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roblindblad Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 (edited) Without having read anything just be good and honest Edited June 21, 2008 by roblindblad Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~tangerine~ Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 (edited) It depends on why it's there. I remember doing that when i was a teenager and was out fooling around with a boyfriend that night... pretty strange... Edited June 21, 2008 by ~tangerine~ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lzfan715 Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Jethro, I just read the part about her going out to dinner with an ex. There are two ways to see it, she told you, so at least she's being honest about it. At the same time, do you know this guy? Did she ask you to go? Don't jump to conculsions, just ask her about it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ledbaby Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 (edited) Nip it in the bud. Ask her if she will take the car and leave you with the house. As far as professional help? It wont work unless you need an attorney. Talking to anyone but her will only delay the inevitable. Nip it. In the bud. Edited June 21, 2008 by ledbaby Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ZepFloyd Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 just read the thread...wow crazy...why not go get divorce papers and test her? say if you're going to see your old b/f i need you to sign these..see what her response is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Del Zeppnile Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 (edited) For craps sake! I can't believe some of sappy advise the men have given out in this thread. Is Spats the only guy here who isn't a total wuss? Look, everybody has fights with their woman, and even if you did say some mean things to your wife, that is all just part of what goes on in any relationship. Truth is she probably did some typical wife things that pissed you off and caused you to go off on her. So yeah, then you go and hurt her feelings. But running to apologize right away is not a good move, especially if she is REALLY pissed off. Women just don't cool their jets that fast. They aren't like a guy who can get mad fast, blow up and then get over it and have a beer. Women love to savor their anger; they like to drag their anger around with them for awhile like a dead cat on a rope for everyone to see and smell. If you just run in there and apologize right away, or run out and buy flowers (what a lame idea that is), then you deny the woman of her natural inclination to be pissed off. She wants to be pissed off at you -- she NEEDS to be pissed off AT YOU! You can't forget that this thing (a woman) is a biological creature the bleeds 5 days out of every month. Of course she has to be pissed offf and hurt, who wouldn't be with a voodoo curse like that hanging around their necks? You just gave her a reason to blame you is all. YOU fell into her trap in all likelyhood, so don't beat yourself up over this too much. My best advise is just to go on with your normal routine. Get up everyday and go to work, mow the lawn, take out the trash, feed the dog and all the other 'man stuff' that you are supposed to do. She will get over whatever you said in due time, if all you do is just pay a minimal amount of attention to her. I'm not saying you need to buy flowers (a fatal error and needlessly expensive precident). Just try and listen a little more... and letting her hold the TV remote control for a week or so will probably do the trick. Edited June 22, 2008 by Del Zeppnile Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zepyep Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Hi all, Del,er,am in the spats pool? KB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ledbaby Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 just read the thread...wow crazy...why not go get divorce papers and test her? say if you're going to see your old b/f i need you to sign these..see what her response is. Sounds to me like she's gaming him and if he let's her she will carry on with it as long as he lets her. Nip it. IN THE BUD! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rosiegirl Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Hey, I am really lost. In the beginning you said she was leaving for a few days becouse you said some mean things to her. Now she went out with an old boyfriend? What happenend in between? I guess I'm not keeping track of the days, becouse I'm all confused here. Did she take the dog and leave, and then come back and say she was going out with an old boyfriend? Did you try to make up for the things you said to her? It would be nice if you could explain what happenend from you're first post on this thread until now, instead of just popping in and out with new things. Some people including me, were really trying to help you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Del Zeppnile Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Hey, I am really lost. In the beginning you said she was leaving for a few days becouse you said some mean things to her. Now she went out with an old boyfriend? What happenend in between? I guess I'm not keeping track of the days, becouse I'm all confused here. Did she take the dog and leave, and then come back and say she was going out with an old boyfriend? Did you try to make up for the things you said to her? It would be nice if you could explain what happenend from you're first post on this thread until now, instead of just popping in and out with new things. Some people including me, were really trying to help you. Sucker Do people really think that you can get or give help on a rock and roll internet forum? Isn't anyone just a little bit suspect of a thread like this one? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JethroTull Posted June 22, 2008 Author Share Posted June 22, 2008 My wife's FATHER called today. He told me what a great time he had with his daughter on Thursday night at Outback!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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